Jack Nasty's Nasty

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"Protection"

My face is hot as I run out of the living room, pushing past the sweaty bodies of the party. Who decides to have a party in an apartment with no ac? I find myself behind the door. As I rested against the apartment's door I couldn't tell if the noise of the party pulsed against my body or it was my heart thumping through the moments which just happened behind me. My head was spinning, mixed with the alcohol and the adrenaline of spin the bottle, Sans... his mouth. I need more alcohol but I can't seem to go back in there. I'm frozen. I left Sans in there alone; with that fire freak. He probably wanted to be alone anyway,  and he definitely didn't want to kiss. I find myself being dragged back to the party by my wandering mind. I need to know what Sans is up to. Just going to check on him, then leave, that's all. I walk back in and search for my big brother...until I hear a recognizable shout.           "Grillbs, you're DRUNK." Sans yells into the bathroom, door just slightly ajar.           "S...s..so are you." He slurs. This is completely unlike Grillby. He's a bartender, he knows how to hold his liquor. "You were soooooooo careful about being with me... b'cause of the guy... in your claasssss. But you kept at the opportunity to kiss your....asshole brother....who you constantly complain about. All the goddamn time." Sans sighs, a sound I know all too well. "Grillby that is completely inappropriate of you to think that, yes I was a bit tipsy but that is disgusting to believe I would... want... to do that." He's right. It is.           "So you looooveee me again?" Grillby perks up, the toilet creaking as he stands, pushing down on Sans and kissing him. I continue to watch through the crack of the door. Sans tries to jostle his way out of Grillby's grasp but he is significantly bigger than my brother. I find myself questioning my next course of action; should I avoid the possible outburst I'll get when Sans finds out I've been spying on him, or help him with this fireball groping him? Unfortunately, my conclusion of being a jealous- no, protective younger brother affected my decision making.         "What the fuck are you doing?" I bust through the door, "Get the fuck off of him!" I command, pushing Grillby off of my brother and back towards the toilet.           "Papyr-"           "Sans, let me deal with this asshole." I turn my attention back onto Grillby. "My brother doesn't fucking want you because you are PLASTERED, get it? You come onto him one more time and I'll break your fiery fucking face." I grab Sans' wrist and pull him out of the cramped bathroom, guiding him out of the party. When we reach the hall he pulls away and looks towards the floor.           "I can take care of myself y'know."           "Prove it," is all I say before turning and leaving. I hold the door for Sans. "Let's go." He follows. He keeps his head down and hands in his pockets as I drive us home. Even as we get into the apartment he stays silent, just heading to his room and softly shutting the door. I sat on the couch in the living room, staring at his door. Did I fuck up? He has to just be torn from being attacked by a friend. The rest of my night is spend pondering about Sans and his feelings. Why does it even matter to me? My last waking thought was about Sans; our kiss. What had it meant? Did it mean anything? Maybe I have a shot with him; now that Grillby is out of the picture I can try to see if Sans does really have feelings for me, or if it was just the best tipsy kiss of my life.

The next morning I arose from my bed, ready to see Sans and hopefully begin my process of getting closer to him. I head into the living room. Although he is notoriously known for sleeping in well past noon, I knock on Sans' door.           "Bro, you in there?" Was I being too friendly? Did it come off as fake? I hear muffled grumbles through the door. "What is it?" he says hoarsely. I sigh, feeling heat trail up my spine as I know I am getting softer. "Want breakfast?" There is shuffling from behind the door, and Sans opens it, sweatshirt open and in his classic shorts. "Sure, bro." he smiles softly.

"The Party"

The morning after, Grillby and I added our finishing touches to the decorated apartment. We laid out plates and napkins to welcome eating the presented fruit bowl along with chips and dip. The doorbell rang and we exchanged a nervous glance, I giggled— excited and fearful about who'd be behind the door. Our first guests were Cole and Sydney. "Hey guys!" Cole dove in for a hug, wrapping his arms around Grillby's neck. "Hi," I say sheepishly as Syd steps forward and pats my back. "This place looks AWESOME," Cole exclaimed, taking in the place, "Didn't expect this haste from you, Cuz. You've been busy." "Well, couldn't have done it alone." Grillby turns to me as do Cole and Syd; the attention causes me to become flustered. "Uh..." I want to say something to diffuse my awkwardness, "I—" The doorbell rang again, then the party began.

There weren't many people, but it was enough to distract me from noticing when he slipped in. And after I knew he was there I still didn't hear the questions he was asking about me and Grillbs, nor did I see the glances he was shooting at me until Cole confronted me with all the questions. I was quite shocked by the off-topic fixation.           "So? Are you guys like... together now?" Cole pushed. "It's not just me that's wondering. You two are quite the conversation piece tonight. Even your brother is curious." I whipped my head around in response to that statement to find Papyrus deflecting his gaze from me to Undyne, acting as if they were in conversation. A girl I'd never seen before—I think I had overheard Syd call her Patty— jumped into the conversation. "Yeah! What's up with you two? Are you trying a second take at this?"           "Well—" Grillby doesn't deny.           "That's so exciting!!!" Patty gives no chance for either of us to answer. "You two were so cute back in the day." She leans forward towards me and Grillbs and his warm hand catches my back when I take a step away from her. I don't want him touching me in front of all these people. In front of him. He's definitely looking at me, Patty's making such a scene. Her breath reaches me and it smells like she's helped herself to Grillby's liquor cabinet we haven't had the time to present yet. Maybe that's what this party needs—what I need; a way to diffuse all of this tension: alcohol. I reject Grillby's hand making his way south in an attempt to comfortably rest on my hip and I push through the wall of people. Heads turn and follow my trail. I then whip open the cabinet loaded with bottles of assorted liquor. That's when the real drama began.

It was an hour later and my third shot convinced me I was being a good host though Grillby was the one who was really carrying the party. He was familiar with being surrounded by needy, drunk people he had to tend to, sadly he wasn't being paid for this shift. I'm not sure if it was me or a fellow drunken guest, but somewhere the idea of playing "Spin the Bottle" was brought up. Against our better judgment, we found ourselves forming a circle on the floor with an emptied wine glass in the center. The liquor numbed my nerves enough to the point where I wasn't looking at the people around me, I wasn't sure where I was, I was just memorized by the bottle spinning, its whirring sound slowing, people cheering in reply to it stopping and chanting "kiss, kiss, kiss," I hardly noticed—never mind cared—Grillby was caressing my back while the bottle was being passed around the circle. Finally its majesty was handed down to me. I centered the glass sculpture in the center of the circle and with anticipation, watched its hollow tip go round and round, sizing its next victim.  Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh. Once it halted it took me a moment to register that it was my turn to participate, I forgot how to move my limbs, and I was almost dizzy from watching the bottle swirl around for what seemed like hours. I manage to look up at my selected match; the rim of the bottle pointing directly in front of me. I look up to face him.  Instead of the onlookers cheering and chanting, there's a pause where no one knows what should happen next. As if the simple rules of the game were suddenly lost.           "Dude, Sans," I hear Syd's voice. "You don't need to do it. I feel like you can re-spin..." The rules of the game are quite simple, they don't ask for much. So why would I defy them? Just because I am expected to be with Grillby, I should only kiss him? Or is it because the bottle chose the one person no one would expect me to want to kiss, but the one person I most desperately want to kiss: Papyrus? We stare into each other's gaze, waiting, but as I begin to crawl towards him, his eyes frantically search around the circle, reading the crowd's confused faces. My advances towards his side of the circle do not linger or pause. I steadily arrive before him, but he does nothing to prevent the path I'm on. I want to kiss him. I don't notice our spectators. I need this excuse to kiss him because there very well may never be another chance I get so close to him. This is my desperate attempt to fulfill this impossible lust for my brother. Maybe after this, it will all cease. Nothing would be between me and Grillby if I could just put all of this chaos behind me.  Once Papyrus' eyes trace back to mine I lean into him, keeping eye contact throughout the entire exchange. My tongue feels inside his mouth as if searching for a response; reciprocation. I search inside his eyes for it as well. Unblinking, confused. The silence in the room surrounds us as I come to question how long our faces have been interlocked; how long the party has been holding its breath. I release our locked lips, unable to hide my wide grin.           "Thank you for coming," I say practically in his speechless mouth.  No one in the apartment knows what to say next, so I spring up—with minimal stumbling—and shake off the awkward interaction with a loud, "A good host ALWAYS keeps company entertained." They laugh and I pave my way out of the circle and into the bathroom to relive the fantasy I've just made a reality. 

"Party Preparation"

ears continue to flow down my cheeks as I storm down the stairs in a hurry. I don't have a clear idea of where I'll go, but I have a sense of security in the name that had just been thrown around. He still crosses my mind even still knowing he couldn't give me what I truly yearn for. I look up once I see my two feet hit the gravel of the apartment's lot. Like destiny, my wishes for saving come true when I see Grillby's blue car still parked, and himself patiently sitting with his window rolled down, as if he was waiting for me to join him. I quickly approach his car and I hear its doors unlock as I near the passenger side.           "Hey," Grillby speaks and my body unravels as I sit down and close the door. I don't reply to his greeting with words but with a sniff, as I attempt to catch my breath. He takes out a handkerchief, but instead of handing it to me he gently uses it to brush away my tears and snot. He directs me to slow my breathing and eventually, I do.           "I'm sorry if I caused all that noise."           "No..." I manage to get out, "That was not your fault, he can just be like that after a long day."           "I don't think you should allow him to get like that. His 'long day' ruins yours. It's not fair to you to have to put up with his attitude."           "I know how to handle him. You just have to let him win sometimes."           "Listen... you shouldn't be taking his heat, at least not in this instance. I—" He pauses briefly, considering his next words, "I didn't just overhear loud voices. Your window was open and I heard every line perfectly. Look—I'm sorry if you feel the same way about me as you do with him. I never meant to boss you around or take you from more important things in your life. I don't want to be the reason you miss out on opportunities for success. I really enjoy your company and love having you be a part of my life, but I can't be the cause of why a family is falling apart."  Grillby turns away, his hands still holding onto me, still comforting me. This reoccurring rush of guilt comes back.          "Grillbs, no—" I grab at his wide shoulders and tears surge through my sockets once my eyes move against the air. "You might've been our topic of discussion but fights like these happen all the time. It truly does not involve you. I can't imagine trying to survive without your support. You've been such a good help to me these past months but Papyrus doesn't see that. He doesn't understand what good you're doing because I don't show him my bad." These three words slip through my teeth and there's no withdrawing them after this moment full of intense emotion: "I need you." It comes out sounding desperate as more tears push through my skull. Grillby turns back to me with a soft yet eager smile. I wrap around him and we hug for a strong few seconds. I gasp for air because the dramatic occurrence brought more emotion into my sensitive state. I shift my body back into my seat and look at him closely. I rest my face onto his and they press into a kiss which turns into a few soft—but passionate—minutes of our lips latching onto each other.

Grillby consoled me. He had a few hours before he had to go to work but he told me he had a couple stops to make before heading back to his apartment where he requested I stay at. For the past few weeks, we invited some of our friends to his place and have sort of an opening party to celebrate Grillby's new and improved apartment—but mostly it was a way for us to make up for the times we had to miss out on social events to straighten out the house. I didn't mention it to Papyrus but it'd be a good place for him to understand me and Grillby's relationship. Maybe if he comes around in the next 24 hours I can convince him to show up, but I don't know if I'll be back home before the party starts tomorrow. 

Grillby unlocks the door to his apartment, he steps in after me. We put down a few bags with our decorations for the party. I'd begin decorating his place while he worked his shift. Once he left I started to hang fairy lights and paper garlands. I stepped off the stool I used to reach where the wall met the ceiling; my phone buzzed just then. It was Cole.

COLE: hey man!!! COLE: syd  and i are so stoked for tmmr

SANS: Hi Cole! I'm glad you're both able to hang out!! SANS: It's gonna be SOOO much fun :D

COLE: yea! COLE: i cant wait to see the happy couple heh...

SANS: Oh??? SANS: WHOOOO

COLE: haha, u and grillby dude! COLE: hes been talking about you nonstop to me and the other cousins COLE: im happy you two are back at it bc you both seem happier with each other around

I freeze, unsure of how to respond. Does Grillby really talk about me to his family? And so highly? 

SANS: You really think so? I guess I haven't thought about it xD

COLE: totally man ;) COLE: see ya

I exit our chat and see my most recent texts. I look at Papyrus' unread message from a few days ago, asking me if I had a class then. I debate texting him "Hey," or something just to start a conversation that might lead to an apology, but my plans were cut short when he sent "sans i'm sorry." I stare at the screen in shock at how he was able to text me right I open our messages. I respond with a short "Me too."

PAPS: sorry i got all pissed off about grillby. PAPS: he's an alright guy, i think i just used him as an excuse to get mad, and that's not fair to either of you.

SANS: No, it's okay! It's understandable. SANS: You thought I was skipping class and you probably had a rough day anyways... we were just the first people you came in contact with to let it out on. SANS: Neither of us blame you, I just hope you can forgive me for messing up so much! SANS: Take as much time as you need, I'll always be your bro :)

PAPS: of course i forgive you. PAPS: i just want you back home, i'm already missing you.

SANS: Oh, I'd love to be back home but tonight I'll be busy helping Grillby set up for this party we're throwing tomorrow. SANS: And it would be REEEEEEEEALLY awesome if you'd show up!

PAPS: i dunno... i'm not a big party monster.

SANS: If you don't show than you won't see me for a whole other day :( SANS: And you said you already miss me SOOO much...

PAPS: well i don't know if i miss you SOOO much...

SANS: But maybe enough to stop by tomorrow? ;)

PAPS: if that's what it takes :)

SANS: HEHE!!! Love you, Paps! <3 SANS: Don't worry, it'll be a lot of fun!!