…drittney?

it’s drittney bitch

it’s drittney ditch

*walks around my house looking for scissors while making a scissor motion with my fingers*

drink some water you beautiful and capable but dehydrated bitch

person about to invent hummus: man fuck these chickpeas *beats the shit out of them*

me, sitting on a throne barechested but wearing ornately engraved plate armor on my arms and legs and cloaked in fine almost translucent silks with an enormous snake draped over my shoulders: i got lost in the fantasy of this dope outfit and forgot what kinda post i was gonna make

I can’t.

me: *smacks my own butt* you are hot and irreplaceable

Mood for 2019

so im sitting there, tit in hand, dissociating

i dont even have guilty pleasures anymore i just like stuff and if people have a problem with that they can go fuck themselves

“Not All Men” you’re right. Kevin Spacey would never do this

As it turns out, Kevin Spacey would in fact do this

This fuckin aged like milk

whats the best way to trim the crest+beard of a silkie? this lady can barely see with all that floof! 

80s chickens

i love them thank you for the advice

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!