I want to wear a mask forever

TW: animal death he was 18, I haven’t cried yet im in a virtual class with my cam and mic off dead inside listening to capitalists blackpill ramble at each other like theyre not an echo chamber, every industry is hustlers this entire country is going to sink into the ocean fuck i hate america but I love it too its like watching game of thrones if everyone was Ramsay Bolton. You wont succeed if what’s under your skin is anything but snakes I my family kept my cat trapped in one house or another his entire life like a prisoner because we loved him but we knew he’d run away and die free from our containment, I found his body at the top of the stairs, I thought he was sleeping, it wasn’t until I noticed he was in the same awkward position as he was earlier that day I got down tho scratch his chin he was stiff and he looked like one of those bad taxidermy jobs, I realized why badly taxidermized cats look like that, the shitty taxidermist only deals with dead cats so when he or she or they wraps the skin around the wooden mannequin they fashion them after the only cats they see, dead ones

but yeah inspo

I know you think this is for attention, or cringe, or mental illness, maybe its all or none of those things. But to me, its important a part of me wants to not be there for everyone, I want to keep my insides, inside. When I’m sad I want to be the person who knows it before everyone has to tell me that I’m sad, I want to be in control of who I present myself as. I want to be me not my face.

I want to wear a mask forever

Still need to read Bratpack but this is a good creed to live your life by

I wanna be like these guys

I want the surface of me to disappear, I always thought My art wasn’t self expression now I realize it is. I want a divider between me and everyone so I can set the rules of who I am, I want other people to fuck off