starless eyes, for heavens sake

asked one of my coworkers how she's doing today and she goes "could be better, could be worse," and another coworker nearby who was eavesdropping chimes in with "could be a lil bit o' alligator curse!" i have no idea what he meant by that but i do know that it has been immediately added to the lexicon.

I'm so old i remember when people liked using Windows

in my high school a few years ahead of me there was a polyamorous girl named luna who was dating a guy and a girl and the girl was named (i swear to god this is her birth name) marea. they were named moon and tide and they were lesbian lovers. i thought it was the most romantic fated thing ever as a tiny baby queer it would make me sigh in adoration. the boyfriend's name was frank

i love seeing my friends interests mentioned somewhere. its like woaaah. thats My Friends interest. from My Friend. wow. epic friend reference

i think it is important to recognize the ways in which your favorite thing sucks. i think it keeps u normal

“word hashtag my word #myword” has done irreversible damage to my vocabulary

i always fall for opening the comments section and then go ahhh right i forgot. the concept of nuance and non-universal experiences just doesn't exist to some people

The mythical disabled person who is so disabled that everyone consistently supports and accommodates them without question is a straw man which only exists as a hypothetical for the political purpose of denying real disabled people care while still being able to argue that said care would be accessible to disabled people who "actually deserves it"

When I am king, we will valorize sanitation workers the way we currently valorize the military

So heroic posters showing trashmen battling allegorical monsters? I'm down.

Yeah but that's just the beginning. I also want Sanitation Worker Discounts at every business and blockbuster movie propaganda glorifying sanitation work. I want random people to salute garbage collectors and thank them for their service. I want drivers who get impatient with the recycling truck and honk at it and swerve around it to become social pariahs