do u ever just think about the fact that molly weasley saw HARRY POTTER, the boy who defeated voldemort, and went “i’m gonna knit this kid a christmas sweater”

what i love thinking about is in the book ron says he told his mum that harry wasn’t expecting any christmas presents and that’s why she sent him them and knowing ron can be a bit scatty/oblivious he probably didn’t mention it til like two days before christmas so i just like to think of molly sitting up all night knitting harry his sweater and baking him homemade fudge or whatever because she’d be damned if she’d let harry go present-less at christmas

Or maybe Harry is just as dismissive. Like, Ron is dreaming aloud of him mom’s homemade fudge and asks Harry what he wants and Harry shrugs “the Dursley never give me anything, last year I got a half-used eraser” and Ron is like 0_0  because what, no one is going to give a gift to his new best friend? So he takes poor Errol telling Percy it’s an emergency and Percy’s like no! and Ron’s like HARRY NEVER GETS CHRISTMAS GIFTS YOU GIT and Percy’s like Oh. Ok. Write mom. And Ron’s letter is mainly MOM HARRY NEVER GETS CHRISTMAS GIFTS FROM HIS MUGGLES WHAT DO I DO and then it’s December 23 at night and Arthur is ready to go to bed and sees his wife get the yarn and the knitting needles out again and Honey I thought you were done? Did we get another child while I was at work? YES, she answers, furious. Ron’s new friend, little Harry. If I get this done by tomorrow morning I can make a batch of fudge and send Errol back with it. And that’s when Arthur Weasley realized they did get another kid when he wasn’t looking but, honestly, once you went past the five kids mark you stopped counting.

“ Did we get another child while I was at work?” “YES”

my ultimate life hack? i like, never wear makeup except for occasions where i want to feel overly hot/professional. this way, people who see me everyday won’t be shocked when i don’t wear makeup, they will instead be shocked at how much hotter i can become. how much potential i don’t unlock for no reason other than laziness

if youre a writer and you want to know what multilingual ppl are really like, today I was giving directions to a Chinese couple but they were having trouble understanding me, so I turned to my gf for help and she explained it very slowly to them in English and sent them on their way. when they were gone I said “babe… you’re Chinese. Why did you give them the directions in English?” and she looked at me with utter horror, and that’s the story of how my gf forgot she spoke her own native language

I need to find a foley artist so I can study their brain. It must be a wonderful state of mind.

I wish my friends would take random pictures of me when we hang out because I’m an arrogant prick and I want more pictures of myself that aren’t selfies.

Someone finally said it

I’m sitting on my front porch when it happens: The ground starts shaking. I’m a small Good Omens meme farmer, enjoying life in my small Good Omens community, but I have seen life in the big fandoms. “They’re coming…” My youngest son, a stringy chap who only knows this peaceful way of life, stops sweeping the porch and looks at me. “Who’s coming, Ma?” I stand up and stare at the horizon, waiting for Them. “The Tennant fans, lad. The Tennant fans.”

me when offered soda: yes. love the bübblés me when offered water: yes! a fresh and sexy beverage me when offered sparkling water: Why Are You Trying To Murder Me Under The Guise Of Hospitality

ah yes they call me “No Queue” Jones because I post everything I reblog at once with no breaks in between and then vanish into the night for extended periods of inactivity

Look, the only live action Disney remake I want is the Emperor’s New Groove and I want there to be no CGI, I want Kuzco to be played by two actors in a cheap llama costume