naomishq:
it’s not that the anger in naomi has died. it’s still there, but it’s an ember burning quietly now and not the flames that had always threatened to engulf everyone when her temper flared. there’s still some residual hurt lingering that had settled in her months ago when she realized that he had left without a word, worrying her and daphne beyond belief. all to get comfort in the arms of luci. but this wasn’t about her. she knows that if they’re silent long enough, he’ll speak again and her suspicion is confirmed as his tone lingers heavy between them. “ it is who you are right now. but maybe that’s not who you have to be. ” she was always going to be brutally honest, especially with him, and now was no exception. she didn’t reach out to him like she usually would, her hands in her lap and her gaze straight out. “ you’ve told daph everything. i think, anyways. now, you just have to wait. ” the mention of his drug addiction takes her off guard for a minute. she knows that he’s always been careful around the party scene but he had never told her. “ is that why you went to luci? ”
normally, isco feeds off naomi’s honesty because they work the same way. isco liked to believe that he was as honest as naomi was, but here he is, only a shadow of the man that he once was months ago. he’s become so selfish that he has let go of who he really is and hearing it come out naomi’s mouth makes it even heavier in his heart, it’s no longer just daphne who believes he’s not the same guy, it’s now naomi too. his best friend, the one that he normally comes to when he’s feeling lost. “i did. i told her everything. but i can’t—i can’t keep doing this to her, or to you. to everyone else. i can’t keep hurting everyone around me and just wait for forgiveness. it’s all i do with my parents...wait for forgiveness that i will never get.” isco bites down on his bottom lip as she questions why he went to luci, a small shrug of his shoulders, there’s no way he can keep hiding, so he lets it all out. “i didn’t call her because i wanted to sleep with her, naomi. i would never drop off the face of the earth for that. i was desperate. i just—i was so happy with daphne this summer. i was so fucking happy. but i had a whole second life that no one else was aware of and it was breaking me apart.” he sniffles a little, closing his eyes to try to get his thoughts in order. “i relapsed when we went to new york at the beginning of the break and before you feel guilty, there’s no way you could have known. trust me, i hid it from my friends and my family for years, there’s no way you could have known. i called luci because i was reaching that point where i just...didn’t feel like i had enough. i didn’t feel like myself anymore. she was the only person that knew. at the time, i just told her everything. i just wanted someone to listen to me and not judge me. i asked for help. at first all we did was...try to get me sober. and we did. it took us a whole week. honestly, it comes and goes for me, you know? my memories of that week. then...i guess we just found comfort in each other.” he whispers slowly, his own brain trying to make sense of everything. “i will never forget everything luci did for me. i messed up and i didn’t know how to be honest without losing daphne when i got her back less than a week ago. i know that makes me a fucking asshole, but it’s the truth.”












