good morning to everyone except the death eater who killed the ice cream guy
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@invalid-wallflower
good morning to everyone except the death eater who killed the ice cream guy

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So I walked into the dentist this morning. My dentist asked me how my weekend was. I said “Good, I watched Captain America last night. I really liked it.” And my dentist says “Oh, my son is in that movie.” At first I thought he was joking but then I realized
Dr. Robert Evans
I looked it up
My dentist is Captain America’s dad
omfg
i like how he said he’s in the movie as if he’s an extra and not the main character and also crhis fucking evans

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This Little Girl Went As A “Spirited Away” Character For Halloween And Became A Meme
“She managed to scare her classmates and one cried,” she said. “Her wish came true, so she’s very happy.”
Me as a child
Just a reminder to check if you are accidentally using your data and not your wifi so you can swap back over
YES LADIES PLEASE DONT BUY THINGS YOU NEED FOR NORMAL BODILY FUNCTIONS AROUND US GUYS.
Am I the only one distressed that he included toothbrushes on this list?
i didn’t reblog this before, but this got better.
so ppl know
I’m so relieved that he wasn’t serious and I’m sure his dentist is too
dude I’ve seen this post a thousand times and I NEVER saw the last bit and I am so shook.
I legitimately thought he was serious before now as well
In our defence, would it really be a shock if somewhere out there are men who seriously believe stuff like “Lol toothpaste is FOR GIRLS”
Stephen Colbert and Stephen King concoct a scary story
Best Trump shade I’ve seen so far
REACH FOR THE SKY

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Stephen Colbert and Stephen King concoct a scary story
Best Trump shade I’ve seen so far
When I grow up I want to be Ming-Na Wen.
She’s the voice of Mulan, as if she wasn’t amazing enough.
She broke it with her fingers. Not a fist, her fingers.
Girl is 50 years old.
FIFTY. YEARS. OLD.
fun fact: When you break things with your hands like that you have t break your fingers on purpose before so that they heal stronger. So basically this woman is so badass she broke her hands just to do this.
You asshat, you’re making it sound like she snaps her fingers in half.
Martial artists like Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee (and yes, fucking Ming-Na Wen, that beautiful badass) will build up their bone strength by repeatedly (and fairly gently) striking sand, gravel, wood and steel - this creates tons of microfractures in their bones (smaller than even a hairline fracture) so the bones will heal over again and make the bones stronger and denser with increased deposits of calcium.
This has to be done over long-ass periods of time, so the bones have time to heal, and none of the fractures expand into actual breaks.
Oh, and she’s doing precise-ass kicks in HIGH HEELS.
she kicks ass like a coursing river
Saw this post so many months ago and I still think about it from time to time lol so badass
Had the absolute pleasure of meeting her. She’s indeed a kind-hearted and gorgeous badass.
tbh America is passing bullshits laws just to be passing bullshit laws at this point

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