Insights of a Teenage Poet

I felt this deep shame whenever i found myself attracted to a guy and i had absolutely no idea why. i would just feel disgusting every time i thought about guys in that way

i thought i was a bisexual girl for awhile because i was more comfortable being a girl’s girlfriend than a guy’s girlfriend

would feel attracted to guys but have zero desire to date or have sex with any of them. the idea of them seeing me naked absolutely horrified me. i identified as ace for years because of this

piv sex made me feel physically ill. still does tbh

despite being very much attracted to guys, i absolutely despised any attempts at flirting because i knew they saw me as a girl and that repulsed me

i know other trans men have brought this up but the whole “do i want to fuck him or do i want to look like him” thing ruined my life lmao

gravitated towards lgbt people even while still deep in denial. no im not trans or anything im just…..really open minded i guess hahahaha

girls flirting with me (which happened fairly often. still does) felt more comfortable than men flirting with me for some reason, despite not really being attracted to women

i was/still am very bad at hiding when im into someone. this led to multiple people figuring out who i was crushing on and doing the typical 14 year old asshole thing and announcing it to everyone. This made me feel much more humiliated than it should’ve. not typical “kid embarassed over crush” stuff but like intense shame and panic that i can’t even describe

my cat: i am going to run in front of you. i am going to sprint in front of you so fast mid step and you are going to punt me into the sun

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