*Insert real name here*

Oh they reallyyyyyy switch up so fast 😂

Ik it’s been a year since we talked but we made plans. In 172 days will follow through.

It’s sad when u find something on the internet that u think someone would like so u save it to send to them but u never get the chance to send it cause they switch up at the last minute

How can u go from texting me any chance u have free to leaving me on read in any conversation in 2 days? Like I’m so confused, did I do something or? I swear u are one of the most confusing people I know. It’s annoying honestly that u switched up that fast but ok sure it’s fine.

HOW, can people literally be so hypocritical. Like ok yea u say that... but then u do that. Okkk cool. I’m tired of lies. Like if u don’t like me tell me straight up instead of playing around. Ik a lot of people that play around have the best in their hearts but honestly just leave if u don’t like it because I don’t want to be around someone that doesn’t want to be around me.

I want a story I can tell. Ofc I have little stories but I want a big high school story. I wanna go out more but I’m too tired and I don’t have the energy. I want to have an anonymous friendship with someone that ends up becoming a big part of my life. I think this just shows I watch to many movies and I spend way too much time inside.

Everything is broken right now. My plans have changed and I don’t like it. Nothing feels real. I want everything, but its all too much too haha. I’m just ou there listening to the front bottoms. Where has my sleep been ?

I am always the first one to notice the slightest change in someone. The difference between sad and tired is very slight with how people portray it. Idk even with my closer friends I will be more obviously sad and they don’t notice, it kinda saddens me sometimes but like its fine i get it. I think I am just an observer. I don’t have to be told something to know it and I think it kinda freaks my friends out. Now that I am thinking about it prolly started in middle school when my close friends told me literally nothing and I had to wait weeks or figure it out on my own to know. Even with relationships or little things. Idk just a random little post.  

What do I do when my mental health is depleting at a rapid pace ? Dye my hair a new color and shave half of it :).

I’m getting tired of people only hanging out with me, because they have no one else to hang out with. or only talking to me because they are in a bad situation. Like I am fine being there for people, but if I literally stayed on the phone with u for hours so you can rant and then after the situation blows over u don’t talk to me, thats bullshit. I’ve had this one friend and he was calling me every night for like a week, because of a break up. I texted him a month ago and he hasn’t even opened it. Idk why this is the biggest theme of my life, but it is so stupid.

I hate with my whole heart not being able to be heard. I don’t really notice this often, but I was talking to my Councillor about this nightmare I had, rn I don’t remember what it was about, because it was months ago, and it linked a lot with not being able to be heard. A lot of people interrupt me, which is fine, unless you are making it literally all about yourself and won’t even listen to one think I have to say (that a whole other rant). I just hate when people are listening to what i’m saying, but not hearing me. Idk its really effecting me tonight because I was trying to get something across to someone and they were taking it in a whole different direction. It just really aggravates me, and I know its not always their fault, but I can’t do anything about it and it just bothers me. In middle school I went mute for a week (because my friends were being dicks and ignoring me so I was gonna see if they noticed) and I feel that might be where this all started. I just wish everyone could understand what I am saying. so I am aggravated. (Haha when I tried to post this it wouldn’t post for like 10 times... kinda ironic)

Explain to me how. My mom went into surgery in the summer for 2 meniscus tears and it was 19 minutes. She went back later to the surgeon to say something was wrong and he said no its back pain: UPDATE her meniscus tears are still there but larger. 

Explain to me how people have the audacity to call me dry when I am the only one asking the questions or trying to start the conversation. I’m gonna be dry if I am the only having the conversation. I miss the times when people would ask me a question or just listen to me rant. Not in like a conceded way because I like hearing what people have to say but its more of a conversation thing and a caring thing. If u are the only one asking questions and they aren’t even asking the question back then it really seems like they don’t care but its whatever. I really don’t understand. 

I really need one of those friends again who will face time with me at night for hours or will text me consistently throughout the day. I haven’t had one of those in a while.

It really is one of those days where you just listen to Guardin, nothing, nowhere, guccihighwaters, and the thebreathingbackwards and doing nothing else. I’m just annoyed at this point that imma be alone in my room for 2 weeks (Because of break) with nothing to do. But at least I have my blue tongue onyx.