WHO ARE YOU REALLY?

tips for walking in an abandoned graveyard

kingsley finds it perturbing that kieran is somehow related to nathan . kieran and charlotte ? he can see . but kieran and nathan ? there's no clear connection or alikeness , except perhaps their cheekbone structure . to kingsley , nathan is the perfect politician . bill clinton in the 90s -esque ' cool ' to anybody dumb enough to believe it . kieran on the other hand always speaks truths , hard jawed to understand why people do what they do . when kingsley stares at nathan ( which he does , long enough for it to turn into a squint ) , he can't differentiate how the two can be halves of each other . " damn , mr mayor . that's nice of you , and some shit . you pay your respects to everyone here ? i don't think i've ever seen you here before . " kingsley doesn't mean for it to be a dig , mainly just curious and surprised ( suspicion leaking back in as always ) . as nathan's eyes skim over the epitaph , kingsley finds himself frowning , leaning deeper onto his shovel that it cuts into some of the grass . one hand reaches up to scratch along the short coily hair growing across his cheeks . " would it be less of a shame if she was old ? " he questions aloud . kingsley shrugs , skinny boned , hard shouldered and glances along the graveyard . the headstones are plentiful , further then the eye can see , like some simba lion king shit . he's surprised at nathan's question . surprised that the mayor is trying to engage , because kingsley thought the both of them knew better then to try chat garbage to each other . " nah , i didn't know her . not really . " kingsley tells him , but allows his gaze to look back at her gravestone . " everyone said she was nice , though . she had a really generous service . " some people may not understand what makes some funerals more beautiful then others . kingsley himself would often find that to be a lot of hogwash nothing. . . but after working here for as long as he has , he can tell the difference between vainness and genuine love . ALAINA HAD PEOPLE WHO GENUINELY LOVED HER . " did you ? as the mayor . . or . . whatever . " he moves his hand in the space between them , eyes floating back up to where nathan's still haven't moved from her gravestone . a brief frown flickers over his lips . maybe he was wrong . this is the most human-esque he's ever seen the mayor .

renee closes her eyes for a moment and can immediately feel like she's back in the life that she used to have . her and mattias were never going to work , she tells herself ( HAS told herself ) this numerous times . but it's still a shock to the system to see him here , now , of all places and all times . it feels vaguely embarrassing , like being caught trying to steal a loaf of bread . as he speaks , his voice still sounds the same as she remembers it . smooth and assertive . it feels warm as she allows it to fill the space between them . a quiet laugh escapes her as she reopens her eyes . " you still know how to flatter me . " renee informs him , with a bemused look . her heart pulsates in the way it always will when you see someone you knew you loved . mattias was good to her . he was sensitive and protective . he was confident and loud in the way he felt about her . her wedding ring feels heavy on her hand and she glances down at it , unable to prevent the reminder that in the end , she chose demetrius . she chose redcreek . she would still never swap that for anything else in the life or any other . " is your mother okay ? " renee asks , tone inflected gently with concern . at his sudden change in tone , the urgency there , renee feels her face crack . SHE STILL CARES FOR HIM . she doesn't want to hurt his feelings but . . . " no . " renee says , with a shake of her head . " no , i'm sorry , mattias . i'm still with demetrius . i have a daughter now . josie . she's incredible . " it's a rejection she wasn't prepared to give , was never GOOD at giving . as if for proof , she waves her hand slightly , the one with the wedding ring on it , connected right to her heart line . " it's really good to see you , mattias . " it always would be . her heart still feels remnants of what it used to , but nowhere near to the same extent . the fire has dwindled . it only exists for one man now . and he's not the man in front of her now . " but this is a . . . wild , unforeseeable coincidence . " another small laugh ripples through her . " i've lived here for a while now . i forgot you even knew of redcreek . " she gives another shake of her head . " i never expected to see you again . "

fawn's head whips around as kingsley speaks up and she snorts, "i never suspected you, trust me, but i would support you if you were." she tells him as they fall into step together, lengthening her stride slightly to keep pace with his longer legs. "you're right, though, it's definitely some annoying white guy. but the idea of a hot girl or NB is a nice thought, y'know as i support women and queer people's wrongs." she may draw the line at serial killing, but it really depends on how hot the perpetrator ends up being. plus, maybe they have a really good reason — you never know. fawn hums, inclining her head slightly in thought, "yeah, i hear you, but boogeyman kinda gives me scooby doo villain and that's a little less scary than just saying 'oh yeah, the brutal serial killer tormenting red creek.' it could be somethin' scarier like... the red creek ripper. that's more threatening, i think." not that fawn will admit any fear regarding the situation. she has enough going on in her life to worry about. "you'd make a really good shaggy if we were doin' real life scooby doo." fawn muses with a teasing grin on her face, "i don't think i fit the velma or daphne archetype unfortunately. plus, i'm sexier than both of them, no offense to hanna-barbera or whoever the fuck." the thought evokes the memory of mornings, siblings sat on the trailer floor watching reruns of old cartoons as she tried to make breakfast, but she shakes the remembrance away quickly, "ritten can be scooby, just a lot more temperamental."

kingsley shrugs , not too surprised that he isn't high on the list of suspects . he slows his pace slightly , finding his own long legs able to more easily match fawn's pace now that he's caught up with her . " i'm just saying , the whole idea that there probably are HEAPS of women serial killers out there but they haven't ever been caught cause they're smart ? it holds up . " he pauses . " not that i'm hoping people die . but we all know this life is a game anyways . you die and respawn . come back different . " kingsley does an one shoulder shrug that moves throughout his whole body at a tepid pace . as fawn speaks again , kingsley does pull a face in silent agreement . touche . this is why he and fawn can always get along . she bounces off him , can keep up effortlessly , and her brain works in the same manner that his own does . " anyone ever tell you how smart you are , fawn ? really . i think it's underrated . or misogyny . probably misogyny . " he informs . kingsley flashes a quick grin as they continue walking . he's been told that he'd make a great shaggy numerous times and he has to agree . while he hasn't watched that much scooby doo , he fucks with the dog and shaggy generally . " i dunno . i reckon velma's super hot . " kingsley feels the need to counter . he can't look at fawn and think of her as hot . it feels strange and beyond objectifying . while they're not similar in any sense , he feels the same way towards her as he would to tori . FAMILIAL . " where are we walking to ? "

kingsley has seen mina in front of people . she has a sureness to her , a confident way of speaking . it doesn't marry with the girl he sees when it's just them two , though . i'm not sure . i don't really know . the words trail out of her like the smoke pilfering out of her mouth , gasped into the night air then disappearing without a second thought . " quiet's good . " kingsley testifies , with a small , singular nod . the graveyard makes sense for kingsley . it always has . " what else do you find creepy ? black cats ? halloween ? " kingsley is a believer in things only having strength if you GIVE IT STRENGTH . and that's why he doesn't believe in anything . that's why his arms are like noodles , flapping in the wind aimlessly . HE HAS NO STRENGTH . but he also has no fear .

renee leans back in the bar stool and contemplates a second glass of wine . she is practical and practiced and refrains from having more than one glass in public for many reasons - but most of redcreek being a present or past client is the MAIN ONE . it'd be a bit strange to see your therapist intoxicated in public . speaking of which . . . her eyes carefully glance to nicolas , and calculate his expression . his eyes look tired . the bags under his eyes are the same , light discolouring . she wonders if he still hasn't been sleeping that well . they're not in session though , and that's a line she'll never cross . but renee mentally reminds herself to ask him about it when their next appointment arises .

RENEE BLINKS AND THINKS SHE CAN'T POSSIBLY RECOGNISE THE MAN IN FRONT OF HER . but she does . she always will . it is like a light left on at the porch , a doorbell ringing , a reminder of home . renee blinks at him , half expecting him to disappear - but he's cool and calm as he tells her to follow him . any better woman would huff , would lift her chin and walk in the opposite direction . renee has tried for so long to be a better woman . instead , she glances around to ensure nobody is watching and follows him discreetly out the backdoor . the quiet darkness envelops them and renee takes a step back , allowing the space that's been between them for DECADES to remain slightly larger . " mattias - " it's good to see you ? it's been so long ? what are you doing here ? what do you want ? i have nothing to say to you . we shouldn't be talking . every word dies on her lips and she swallows them down , burying them in the pit of her stomach . " you look almost exactly the same . " the attempt at small talk is brutal , like a knife pressed to the inside of her palm . " what brings you to redcreek ? "

kingsley pulls a face at kieran's question . despite his disenchantment towards the fuckass MAYOR aka kieran's dad , kingsley has always found kieran to be a lot more pleasant and likeable ( maybe HE should run for mayor ) . there's strict no bullshit , no phony smiles , or purposeful chances to try and get a photo to look as DIVERSE as possible . when kieran talks , he says every word with meaning . this is something that kingsley appreciates , as his own brain moves far too quick and scattered to always keep up . PURPOSE and PRECISION are his best friends , and kieran is good at delivering both of them . the moonlight bathes both men . no matter how many times kingsley tries to smooth out the clump of dirt , it won't sit the way he likes . he grumbles to himself before moving his shovel again , in the same routine movements that's he so accustomed to and which kieran has probably watched him do countless times by now . " people talk a lot . " kingsley agrees , half unable to focus properly until this dirt sits RIGHT . he lets daniela and alaina's names wash over him like raindrops . he's been asked his thoughts a few times now ( surprising ) and kingsley wishes he had more to say on the topic . " man . . i dunno . but something's up . security's been locked down tighter of late , and i don't mean after alaina. i mean . . before that . firewalls and shit . " hacking suddenly became a harder task in a way that it previously wasn't . " someone high up knows something . it's always the high ups . they make a deal with the devil then get surprised when they gotta pay up . pied piper shit . " kingsley tries not to implicate kieran's DAD in it , but he'd be lying if he said he didn't think there was a plethora of guilt there . he rests on the shovel for a temporary moment , crooks his head up to meet kieran's gaze , watching smoke puff out of him . " i liked daniela . and alaina . like , shit , dude . " kingsley gives a half shrug . " most people liked them . so why the fuck were THEY chosen ? no way is that a coincidence or circumstantial . " kingsley looks back down at the eroded dirt before them . " last time , they went after heather , right ? she was also liked by everyone . " kingsley allows his brain to tick , and tick . " so . . they'd want someone like EZRA next , right ? if they're trying to do copycat shit from 1999 i mean . . . "

renee hadn't even realised she was in a daze until she's promptly pulled right out of it . the first thing she realises is that her wine glass is empty . the second is just how quiet redstone is tonight . people are hardly falling over themselves to be out and about with fear and terror leaking throughout the town . SHE BLINKS AGAIN , gives a small shake of her head , as if physically rearranging her thoughts . " god , sorry . i really was a thousand miles away . " not in the vanessa carlton way , either . " days feel like they're getting longer . " she admits lightly , before clearing her throat and sitting up straighter in her chair . she can already hear the way her old agent would say posture , renee . posture is everything . " i think i had the most amount of back-to-back clients today then i've had in a long time . people are scared . it's bringing up a lot of old memories for some . " she isn't sure why she's telling nicolas this , other than he's always been so very easy to tell things to . renee sighs quiet and to herself , letting the air escape her lungs . IT'S BRINGING UP OLD MEMORIES TO HER , TOO . last time , renee had her daughter strapped to her chest . now . . . she wishes she could strap josie right back up to her again , because if anything ever happened to her , renee has no idea what she'd do . renee pulls her thoughts back again , trying not to ruminate for too long on them . " i guess it's been the opposite for you around here . "

kingsley's smile is ever-present , a potentially rare sight . he offers smiles but they're usually brief , a ' blink and you'll miss it ' type of thing . he leans back in his bar stool , not wanting to crowd in mic's space too much ( as addictive as that sounds ) . his eyes flick up and down her one more time before he busies his gaze by flicking it around the bar . it's quiet tonight , a direct result of the fear and worry people are feeling about everything that's happening . a small smile lights him up again , but he keeps his gaze on his drink , as if fascinated by the brown liquid , swishing it around the glass dully . " if i'm the perfect gentleman , what does that make you ? " he asks , one eyebrow quirking up in tandem with the side of his mouth .