Emssim

Simply stating

some ideas that crossed my mind 

one day, when I was on a holiday,

away from everyone in every way

with a bottle of absinthe to keep me sane:

You can’t miss what you forget

and with days like these I do it best,

there’s no predestination

just progression and recession 

of self identification,

and there’s some confidence

with one’s lonesomeness.

It takes time and clarity

to welcome life eagerly

and be in uneasy situations,

where loud places close in

and the world spins

so better let your breathe relax,

It was just some blood stained finger tips

that I used to wipe away the sweat of a day,

from above my brows, below the tip of my bangs

that I used to gently race around the brim of your face

as we remained embraced. 

While my fingers remained sore and I was

searching for a reason not to leave,

I was just beguiling myself

into thoughts I wanted to believe. 

It probably wasn’t wise 

to use my finger tips at the time

to etch any resemblance of you in my chest.

And I am clueless beyond belief

why I thought repeating this 

would simply sanitize me.

By the end of everything anyway

I guess I just had nothing left to say,

just a “I’ll see you around someday”

It’s hard to carry the weight

of sleep in my eyes

as I walk the day away

when there’s nights where the ceiling

simply stares me down, 

catching my gaze fixed on dim stars

between the black and broken 

open window blinds behind me.

It’s nothing more than seconds passing

and trying for sober sleep, failing

so I’ll stay up until I succumb

to the weight gaining on my eyes

to remain silent for hours.

And if I wake up in between

then and alarm clocks,

it’s because I want to disappear

with you, transcend time and illuminations

wide awake in a dreamscape,

since that improbable place is probably

propagated by the plausible fact

I’m at least always half asleep

and can’t possibly think straight.

But at 5 am, it’s too early to settle

my mind with a drink

cause who wants to pass out

right when the beauty of the sun

stops its sleep, 

settling for seconds

on the horizon of the new time cycle.

I guess the day is gonna come

and I’ll just have to settle for

my tired eyes to finally wake up