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@ineedsomeserioushelp
90% of the reason I love whump shit so much is so I can project my PTSD through it
If I’m never going to escape my trauma at least I can live it through my character’s post-whump recovery. If I never get words of comfort and reassurance at least I can hear it through a nonexistent caretaker
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Twisted positivity.
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I hate it how people will say shit like "you don't have to get over your trauma, you just have to stop letting it control your life" like bitch that's entirely out of my control, and I am not "letting" my trauma control me, my trauma made me severely disabled FOR LIFE!!!!
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Online therapy really do be like "instead of having an acute stress response, have you tried a cute stress response?"
Weaponized positivity.
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When I say this site has a toxic positivity problem, i mean that a lot of yall dont understand how to truly help those with trauma or mental illness. Positive affirmations, sunshine, and exercise are all well and good but they're just aren't enough. I hate how saying this is considered negative. The reason many ppl are suffering is due to their environmental circumstances. A simple "remember to drink water! You are loved!" does not fix poverty or pollution or chronic illness or abusive parents. If we want to actually improve society, we gotta be honest about the cards some ppl are dealt.
telling people to "be grateful" for the good things they have when they live(d) a traumatic life often misses the mark completely
being depressed is a natural and understandable response to trauma. it's not an issue of whether the person is grateful for what they have or not. it's not an issue fo character.
it's about human, emotional pain. it's about how they've lost hope for themselves. telling someone who's lost that to be grateful for things outside themselves can be deeply invalidating.
sometimes what someone needs isn't a reminder to be grateful for the good things they have. sometimes people need to be reminded that they deserve the good things they have, in spite of all the bad things that happened to them.
trauma can leave you with sense of worthlessness or helplessness. you think it's your fault. you think you should be better than this. you think no one can or will help you. you forget that people really can & do love you.
gratitude comes after believing you actually deserve any of the good things "you should feel grateful" for in the first place. happiness and joy come from there. you don't get any of that if you just moralize someone else's distress.
people deserve to feel like they matter and their pain is seen with depth - not just the same toxic positivity over and over. self-gratitude is important too.
Toxic Positivity, Toxic Masculinity.
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i am so tired of how often someone will like, flat out actively admit that an experience was horrifying and painful and deeply distressing over and over again for a prolonged period of time and then go "but i'm sooo grateful, that was the only way i could've gotten better, the only way out is through :)))" and its just like. I Don't Think That's Inherently True??? maybe we should stop conflating the true fact of "sometimes you have to do things you don't like" with "sometimes you are asked to do way more than is actually fair or reasonable and then gaslight yourself into thinking it was as a coping mechanism, which is just going to set you up to suffer even more, and encourage others to suffer as well, because now you have a skewed and eroded boundary in regards to what you think is fair and reasonable" like sometimes "you're so strong" rhetoric just loops into another form of toxic positivity by just conditioning you to think that ignoring limits and warning signs is good, and should be some kind of expected default, and not like, an emergency skill to only call upon when absolutely necessary.
Ah yes, let's suppress complex emotions in favour of superficial “positive vibes". I genuinely don't understand why everyone is running away from negative emotions. You don't have to smile all the time or be in a good mood 24/7 and you don't have to fake positivity if you're not feeling positive. Allow yourself to feel negative emotions every now and again, they're normal and healthy.
“People ask me, “Have you tried yoga? Kombucha? This special water?” And I don’t have the energy to explain that yes, I’ve tried them. I’ve tried crystals and healing drum circles and prayer and everything. What I want to try is acceptance. I want to see what happens if I can simply accept myself for who I am: battered, broken, hoping for relief, still enduring somehow. I will still take a cure if it’s presented to me, but I am so tired of trying to bargain with the universe for some kind of cure. The price is simply too high to live chasing cures, because in doing so, I’m missing living my life. I know only that in chasing to achieve the person I once was, I will miss the person I have become.”
Alice Wong “Disability Visibility: First-Person Stories from the Twenty-first Century”
Something really not talked about with trauma disorders is the paranoia.
Being scared and jumping to conclusions when people stand a little too close to you, not believing people’s compliments and thinking they have hidden motives, not believing when people tell you they like/love you, thinking that strangers you see on the street want to hurt you, etc.
i find it impossible to explain this even to other traumatized friends without sounding like a freak. i have a hard time seeing people as “people” and not “threats”. i assume strangers might attack me, i assume words have hidden meanings, and that secrets shared are just ploys to get me to open up.
the worst part is knowing this and knowing it’s unhealthy, but all you face is blame. the symptoms aren’t your fault but you get all the shame.
i guess that’s why i hate the whole “your trauma isn’t your fault but it’s your responsibility” shit. even if i agree with it on some level i find it so triggering. when do i get to fucking rest? when is anyone who caused me to be this way going to take some fucking responsibility?
so. i just want to be alone, focus on myself, vent here, and decorate my room
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Something really not talked about with trauma disorders is the paranoia.
Being scared and jumping to conclusions when people stand a little too close to you, not believing people’s compliments and thinking they have hidden motives, not believing when people tell you they like/love you, thinking that strangers you see on the street want to hurt you, etc.
When people just making small talk sets off your fight or flight response. Shaking with adrenaline and trying not to cry because somebody started asking you questions about yourself. Being unable to use the laundry room because someone else might be in there.
Something really not talked about with trauma disorders is the paranoia.
Being scared and jumping to conclusions when people stand a little too close to you, not believing people’s compliments and thinking they have hidden motives, not believing when people tell you they like/love you, thinking that strangers you see on the street want to hurt you, etc.
