incorrect book of life quotes @incorrectbookoflifequotes - Tumblr Blog

What do you mean that this didn't happen in the movie?

*in class*

Manolo: I think I know the answer teacher!

Xibalba: Meh meh meh meh meh meh mehmeh!

Manolo: Shut up dumb ass!

Xibalba: AY! Don’t call me dumb, you fuckin’ mortal!

La Murete : Xibalaba! Did you just say the ‘F’ word?!

Xibalba: *acting innocent* Mortal?

Manolo : No, he’s talkin’ about FUCK. You can’t say FUCK in school, youfuckin’ dumbass.

La Murete : Manolo!

Xibalba: Why the fuck not?

La Murete: XIBALABA!

Candle Maker: Dude, you just said fuck again!

La Murete: CANDLE MAKER!

Joaquin:*lifts head up from nap* Fuck

La Murete: JOAQUIN!

Xibalba: What’s the big deal? It doesn’t hurt anybody! Fuck, fuckity, fuck, fuck, fuck!

La Murete: How would you like to go see the school counselor?!

Xibalba: How would you like to suck my balls?

*Class gasps*

La Murete: WHAT DID YOU SAY?!

Xibalba: Oh, I’m sorry, I’m sorry! Actually, what I said was,

Xibalba: *Holds up megaphone*

Xibalba: HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO SUCK MY BALLS, LA MURETE?

Maria: Holy Shit Dude.

#nsfw text #swearing #submission #ask-savannaroonie #source: south park #the book of life #xibalba #la muerte #maria posada #manolo sanchez #joaquin mondragon #candlemaker

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After a while between Manolo and Xibalba arguing on if mortals are better than gods or not...

Manolo: Wager cheater!

Xibalba: (gasps) Take that back, you… (Xibalba runs out of ideas.) not…dead person…

Manolo: You can’t even come up with another name! That proves it!

Xibalba: Proves what?

Manolo: That mortals are better than gods!

#the book of life #xibalba #manolo sanchez #submission #robowil #source: spongebob squarepants #Source: SpongeBob SquarePants Pressure

“Here I come, you creep!”

Joaquin, to Chakal (probably)

#the book of life #joaquin mondragon #Source: Sonic Adventure 2 #submission #robowil

After accidentally ruining Candle Maker's first dollar

La Muerte: (referring to all of the methods she and Xibalba did on attempting to get the paint off the dollar) Nothing’s working!

Xibalba: Wait! We’re not cavemen!

(Xibalba points to a computer.)

Xibalba: We have technology!

(Xibalba repeatedly slams the computer on the dollar, causing the computer to get destroyed in the process.)

#the book of life #la muerte #xibalba #source: spongebob squarepants #Source: SpongeBob SquarePants Wet Painters #submission #robowil

Manolo: Hey Maria, watch me do the “Grouchy Joaquin!”

Joaquin: Stop naming moves after me!

Manolo: (imitating Joaquin) Everybody’s an idiot except for me!

Joaquin: Well, it’s true.

#the book of life #manolo sanchez #joaquin mondragon #source: spongebob squarepants #Source: SpongeBob SquarePants - I Had An Accident #submission #robowil

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La Muerte: Hi, Xibalba! What are you doing today?

Xibalba: Stringing lights so Santa knows, in no uncertain terms, to go away! (The lights he strung up on his castle read “GO AWAY.”)

La Muerte: Oh…kay…

Source: It’s a SpongeBob Christmas!

#the book of life #la muerte #xibalba #submission #source: spongebob squarepants #Source: It’s a SpongeBob Christmas!#robowil #sorry i must have missed this one!

During a blackout at Joaquin's mansion

Manolo: (to Maria) Joaquin’s in the corner wearing his eyepatch.

Joaquin: (in a spooky voice) But is it my left eye, or my right eye? You don’t know!

#the book of life #manolo sanchez #joaquin mondragon #submission #robowil #Source: Phineas and Ferb - Blackout!#source: phineas and ferb

Xibalba and La Muerte play with a stick and a cup

Xibalba: (bored) La Muerte?

La Muerte: (also bored) Yes Xibalba?

Xibalba: Do you think it will make the game more exciting if we played with…

(Xibalba brings out another stick.)

Xibalba: …two sticks?

(La Muerte makes a ridiculous facial expression and takes the sticks from Xibalba.)

La Muerte: Two sticks?! That’s against the rules! You can’t change the rules, Xibalba, just because I’m winning!

Xibalba: I’m sorry, mi amor. I’m just so bored playing “Stick in a Cup.”

Source: SpongeBob SquarePants Whirly Brains

#the book of life #la muerte #xibalba #Source: SpongeBob SquarePants Whirly Brains #source: spongebob squarepants #submission #robowil

“Oh yeah? Well I’ll show YOU! Bring it on!”

Joaquin, to Chakal (probably.)

#the book of life #joaquin mondragon #Source: Sonic Adventure #submission #robowil

After someone tattled on Sartana to Xibalba

Sartana: Papa, what are you doing? Xibalba: Uh, nothing mija. Sartana: What did I tell you about talking to strangers? Xibalba: Now she’s gonna kick MY butt!

#the book of life #xibalba #sartana #source: spongebob squarepants #submission #themusesproxy

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Xibalba: Let’s have another.

(La Muerte makes a shocked face)

#the book of life #xibalba #la muerte #Source: SpongeBob SquarePants Rock a Bye Bivalve #submission #robowil

Joaquin: Hey, Cap'n, got a second?

General Posada: It’s “Captain.”

Joaquin: What did I say?

General Posada: “Cap'n,” like Cap'n Crunch.

Joaquin: All right, but to be fair, Cap'n Crunch was a war hero and the primary male role model in my house, growing up, so…

#the book of life #joaquin mondragon #general posada #source: brooklyn nine nine

Maria: Are you just gonna do stupid bullshit for the rest of your life?

Joaquin: You mean like for work or, like, in general?

#the book of life #maria posada #joaquin mondragon #source: bojack horseman #swearing //

“Let’s find Chakal and show him the REAL power of teamwork!”

Manolo to Joaquin and Maria (probably)

#the book of life #manolo sanchez #Source: Sonic Heroes #submission #robowil

Meeting Xibalba in the dining room

Manolo: I lost. I lost? Wait a second, I’m not supposed to lose! Let me see the script… (Everyone pulls out their “Book of Life” scripts) Carmen: He’s got to have another shot! Xibalba(grumbling): Yeah, yeah he does.

#submission #themusesproxy #the book of life #xibalba #manolo sanchez #carmen sanchez #source: robin hood men in tights

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Manolo: Remember when you said you weren’t gonna interfere with my love life?

Xibalba: No, that doesn’t sound like me at all.

#the book of life #manolo sanchez #xibalba #source: baby daddy

You cheated on me? When I specifically asked you not to?

La Muerte to Xibalba, probably

#the book of life #la muerte #xibalba #source: the office

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