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Matthew Tkachuk: Stop asking me if I’m straight, gay, bi, whatever. I identify as a THREAT.

#nhl #incorrect quotes #hockey #matthew tkachuk #florida panthers #stanley cup champions

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Connor McDavid: I have no idea why people say they struggle with anxiety. It comes so naturally to me

#nhl #incorrect quotes #hockey #connor mcdavid #scf 2024 #edmonton oilers

Aleksander Barkov: Did you have to break your stick over his back?

Matthew Tkachuk: You were on the bench. You didn’t hear what he said to me

Barky: What did he say?

Chucky: He said ‘what are you gonna do? Hit me with your stick?’

Sergei Bobrovsky: That’s fair

#nhl #incorrect quotes #hockey #aleksander barkov #matthew tkachuk #sergei bobrovsky #florida panthers

Matt Duchene: My kink is when people actually care about my feelings and what I have to say

Tyler Seguin: Too unrealistic. Settle for bondage like the rest of us

#nhl #incorrect quotes #hockey #dallas stars #matt duchene #Tyler Seguin

Mitch Marner, arguing with William Nylander: I am an excellent secret keeper! I’ve kept all of your secrets

Auston Matthews: Secrets? What secrets?

Mitch: Oh no. No. Matty. I’m not going to tell you because I’m an excellent secret keeper!

[Willy walks away]

Auston: You’ll tell me later?

Mitch: You already know

#nhl #incorrect quotes #hockey #mitch marner #toronto maple leafs #william nylander #auston matthews

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*Connor McDavid explaining the wonders of hydration to a group of rookies*

Connor: Water is so good for you! It can solve so many problems! Want to lose weight? Drink water. Clear skin? Drink water.

Leon Draisaitl, from across the locker room: tired of someone? Drown them

#nhl #incorrect quotes #connor mcdavid #leon draisaitl #edmonton oilers

Brady Tkachuk: I have a bad feeling about this

Matthew Tkachuk: what do you mean?

Brady: don’t you ever get that little voice in your head that tells you if something is going to get you in trouble

Matthew: no?

Brady: that actually explains so much

#nhl #incorrect quotes #hockey #brady tkachuk #matthew tkachuk

William Nylander: You shouldn’t be using a straw

Mitch Marner: Yeah yeah it’s bad for the environment or whatever

Willy: No, it’s just a weird way to eat spaghetti

#nhl #incorrect quotes #hockey #mitch marner #william nylander #toronto maple leafs

Trevor Zegras: Send dudes

Jamie Drysdale: You mean nudes?

Trevor Zegras: No, I’m about to get jumped and I need some backup

#nhl #incorrect quotes #hockey #anaheim ducks #trevor zegras #jamie drysdale

Literally any player on the entire NHL: Uh you know we just gotta pucks deep

Waiter: I asked if you wanted fries with that

#nhl #incorrect quotes #hockey

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Coach Mike Sullivan: Where are you??

Evgeni Malkin: You said I’m healthy scratch

Coach Mike Sullivan: I never said that

Evgeni Malkin: oh, well can I be a healthy scratch?

#hockey #nhl #nhl players #pittsburgh penguins #evgeni malkin #mike sullivan #incorrect quotes

Trevor Zegras: ARE YOU-

Mason McTavish: fucking

Trevor Zegras: KIDDING ME? YOU-

Mason McTavish: fucking

Trevor Zegras: IDIOT. WHAT KIND OF

Mason McTavish : bullshit

Trevor Zegras : CALL IS THAT? ARE YOU

Mason McTavish : fucking

Trevor Zegras: BLIND?

Troy Terry: what was that?

Mason McTavish: Jamie said that he finds swearing unattractive. I’m just helping Z out.

#incorrect quotes #anaheim ducks #trevor zegras #mason mctavish #troy terry #jamie drysdale #nhl

William Nylander: A drunk mind speak sober thoughts

Auston Matthews, drunk af: Mitch I think I’m in love with you

Mitch Marner, drunk af: hehe stomachs think all potatoes are mashed

#incorrect quotes #nhl #hockey #toronto maple leafs #william nylander #auston matthews #mitch marner #1634

Jamie Drysdale, coming down the stairs: Is something burning?

Trevor Zegras, leaning seductively across the counter: Just my desire for you *winks*

Jamie Drysdale: Trevor the toaster is on fire

#incorrect quotes #nhl #hockey #trevor zegras #jamie drysdale #trevorjamie #jamietrevor #which one is it?#3446 #well now it’s #611 #but I’ve also seen it as #116 #which one? I really don’t know #anaheim ducks

*Playing Scrabble*

Kris Letang: I will put down my “A” and my “T” to spell “AT”

Evgeni Malkin: I will put down “R” to make “RAT”

Sidney Crosby: And I will add to your “RAT” to make

“BIOSTRATIGRAPHIC”

Evgeni Malkin: *flips board*

#incorrect quotes #nhl #hockey #pittsburgh penguins #kris letang #evgeni malkin #sidney crosby #it’s not because Sid is smarter #it’s because he’s more competitive #he studies the dictionary just so he can beat 2 guys that English isn’t their native language at scrabble

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Bryan Rust: It’s funny how when you get older, you start to enjoy things you hated as a kid

Jake Guentzel: Like taking naps

Brian Dumoulin: And getting spanked

Bryan Rust:

Jake Guentzel:

Brian’s Dumoulin: *loudly sips drink*

#hockey #nhl #pittsburgh penguins #bryan rust #jake guentzel #brian dumoulin #dumos looking at you tanger #incorrect hockey quotes

Jonny Toews: You’re pretty dumb.

Patrick Kane: Thank you, that’s very nice of you to say.

Jonny Toews: I literally just insulted you, why are you thanking me?

Patrick Kane: All I heard was “You’re pretty” I’m choosing to to focus on the positives in life.

#hockey #nhl #incorrect quotes #jonathan toews #Patrick Kane #Kazer #1988

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