"Not having a carrd is a red flag!" No a red flag is you thinking you're entitled to a little pamphlet full of someone else's information.

idk whats funnier: that tumblr got people to spend multiples of $7.99 to add fake verification checkmarks to their blog to ""make fun of"" twitter's latest fuckup, or that these checkmarks literally do not show up for mobile users and thats why i had no idea this amazing feat of opportunistic capitalism was even happening until just now

New people with empty accounts that are suddenly following me, I really need you to do something that looks like a human person. I've been here long enough now to remember the old wars, and you are coming into my home wearing the uniform of our enemies.

nobody bitch about the tumblr checkmark this is the funniest shit staff has pulled in months and its absolutely contributing to the landlord-firing-gunshots-at-passing-cars vibe of the past week