THE AGENT*

AstroSkiploom: I told you so many things about me that nobody knows

AstroSkiploom: And we got married and everything

AstroSkiploom: But is all of it a lie? 😔

AstroSkiploom:

AstroSkiploom: Gio's my best friend. My best man

AstroSkiploom: I'm going to be sick

AstroSkiploom: Please don't tell anyone, I beg you

Ryemon: And I told you a lot too...i mean, not all of it was true but some of it was

Ryemon: EXCUSE ME. MARRIED? You're married to RYAN?????

Ryemon: Oh god. Probably? Did you marry him because he likes pokemon because newsflash, I'm not Ryan, I like pokemon, not him.

That sounds highly unlikely. Especially since your fishing for my advice—which is to be honest, probably. I don’t know. Isn’t that the usual advice people give?

You know I’m right, unless it’s just the fact girls don’t listen to me. I’m Ryan, so you have a name for the guy that’s giving your heartfelt funeral speech. Didn’t we go to school together? I recognize you from somewhere. 

It’s probably just you. Girls listen to me all the time. Ryan....Thomas? Oh god. No. No, you don’t know me! You don’t know me and I don’t know who Dennis is at all! Look, a bird!

Oh shoot. That doesn’t work over the internet.

Oh yeah, and he was a loser. I tried to talk her out of it but girls never listen. No problem, I’ll give some heartfelt speech about how dedicated to relationships you were. Put your other half off the scent. 

As a girl, I resent that. Oh, thank you so much! Say, I’m Imogen. Just so you’ve got a name when you come to my funeral.

AstroSkiploom: I'm so confused but um

AstroSkiploom: Are you or are you not Ryan?

AstroSkiploom: Because I asked him and he said

AstroSkiploom: He had no idea about this chat

AstroSkiploom:

AstroSkiploom: So all of this was a lie?

AstroSkiploom: Dear Arceus, it's a lie

AstroSkiploom:

AstroSkiploom: Please don't tell anyone what I told you

AstroSkiploom: I already feel dumb enough

AstroSkiploom: 😔

Ryemon: ....

Ryemon: no im not. but in my defense, how the hell was I supposed to know you'd end up knowing ryan after highschool at all????

Ryemon: god you're so nerdy

Ryemon: why would I? it'll mean admitting to this whole chatroom and I'm trying to bury this deep

              Well if your friend hasn’t had an engagement party yet, they could always do that just to get the presents. Once that’s over with they just gotta go 👻 — happens enough on that tinder thing right ?? 

Not everyone was made to be comforters though, some were made to feel very awkward in those situations. Marcus - we went to school with him? Very hot but also very confusing and I can’t wrap my head around this whiplash feeling. But it is what it is.

I’m guessing you’re also someone who feels awkward in those situations too? Marcus? That Marcus? He broke your heart? That cheeky bastard. I love him. If you can wrangle him into settling down I’ll personally pay for your wedding. But don’t be too hard on him, he’s the love of my life. 

My aunt dated an undertaker, she might have his number? All you need is a good coffin and a fake funeral. 

“Yeah, someone stole my passport. I was dumb and I fell asleep on the train, of course I got my passport stolen.” Beck wrinkled his nose. “I don’t know, I want to see the positives in life, even when my passport gets stolen,” he joked with a grin. “I don’t see the point in being so damn dreary.” Beck shrugged. “Change of pace. I don’t know.” 

“No, nothing, forget it. I didn’t mean anything.” Felix shook his head, hoping Imogen wouldn’t go back to the topic, and the brief seconds away from her as he bagan walking gave him a break to collect himself and mentally remind himself to not screw things up, no matter how much he wanted to tell his old friend what was going on with him. As she pulled him back, the man rolled his eyes. “Believe it or not I grew up, so no, no flask in here.” He said in a mocking tone, alhough in those moments he wished he had one. Then, Felix frowned listening Imogen’s words, was it possible that it was not just him who found himself in this upside down life? He wanted to believe so, desperatedly, because that would mean he wouldn have somone to freak out with but he dared not dare to trust completely on her in case it was a trick.

Those were his thoughts until she mentioned the news he had indeed hear about James’ death and then not knowing who she was engaged to, when that happened and mostly, until he heard the dispare in her voice. It couldn’t be possible she was faking this. At least he hope she wasn’t or else, things would go well for him. Felix lowered his head and spoke in almost a whisper. “Fuck, Immo, are you for real? I swear I’ll kick your ass if you’re fucking with me.” Looking left and right, he kept talking. “I woke up and suddently I’m old and engaged and other shit I have no momories about. And I know what you’re thinking about James, it went through my head too.” Felix could hear his hear pounding in his ears as he waited for the blonde to reply, hoping he hadn’t made a mistake by sharing with her what he was going through.

“Felix...” she breathed out in a sigh, letting it carry across the room. If he didn’t want to talk about it, she wouldn’t force it out of him...but if anyone needed things forced out of him, it was probably Felix. When he mentioned the flask, she smiled, thanking the moment of levity. “Are you sure?” She grinned, “I won’t tell if you have on. I would. Teenagers are hell. I say that because I remember how I was vividly.” She couldn’t imagine the youth changed much from when she was here, and if that were true, she felt sympathy for Felix.

“Oh please,” she rolled her eyes, diving at the change to poke fun at Felix despite the topic, “we both know you can’t kick my ass. I’d kick yours first.” But even that wasn’t enough to lift the atmosphere, the dread surrounding Imogen. “No, no,” she gestured wildly, speaking in a rushed whisper, “me too! I don’t remember anything either! I woke up just like that too! Engaged and old!” She dug out her phone and held out the threatening text she’d received to Felix, “look at this and tell me he wasn’t murdered! Not only will people think we’re crazy, but there’s some freak out there trying to keep our mouths shut.”

AstroSkiploom: Pokemon Trainers til the end!

AstroSkiploom: You're the Champion and I'm an aspiring Professor

AstroSkiploom: I love your Shiny Vulpix, I EV trained him and got him all these ribbons. Sometimes when I'm said I look at his profile screen and listen to his cry and think about us going on adventures together

AstroSkiploom:

AstroSkiploom: Um, well, funny story about threesomes... I kind of did ask him by accident... heh...

AstroSkiploom: Maybe I want both of you...? 😅

AstroSkiploom: I don't know, I never thought I was this kind of person who does... stuff. I just want both of you in my life

AstroSkiploom: And you? You're doing okay tonight?

Ryemon: Really?? that's it??? why the hell are you so wound up about kissing someone who's not me then

Ryemon: That's...cute. really cute. sorry. excuse me. i need to go cry. you're adorable.

Ryemon: DID HE SAY YES??? please tell me he said yes

Ryemon: who does "stuff"? how old are you? just say sex

Kiran resists the urge to say anything about Imogen eating directly from the pan, dreading how much of her mother she was starting to turn into. She dismisses the thought and listens to Imogen thoughtfully. “I was told I could dry up a local bar if I wanted to. Maybe those weren’t his exact words, but hey, I’m going through a midlife crisis at twenty six. I wish I was living that fun divorce life but all I’m getting is no sex right now and pathetic begging instead of lavish gifts. Maybe it’s something I’m doing wrong.” Half joking. “Well yeah, it’s all about the wedding. I got thousands of dollars of useless stuff at mine. You just have to wait it out.” Kiran tilts her head to the side, not sure how much prying would be appropriate. (How appropriate was the situation with two women lightheartedly talking about the problems in their lives?). “I love that we’re in the same boat right now. –That came out wrong. You guys still have a chance, and I mean that in the least depressed way possible.”

A friend. Sure, you’re asking for a friend. That totally seems plausible right now.

“You haven’t changed one bit Imogen. Why am I not surprised?” she replied flatly. Isobel did not appreciate the mockery that was hidden behind the woman’s words and she certainly would not get any answers from Isobel. She didn’t own Imogen anything. Even now she paraded around like she was queen B, but for once Isobel didn’t care about the titles the other wore like a crown. This all felt like it was a dream, better yet, a never ending nightmare. The last thing she remembered was departing ways with those of her past yet her some were reappearing. “Seriously though, what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be attending to some man. Being his personal trophy of sorts?” 

I don’t think there is one, is there? Like, just ghost them, I guess. Clean cut from their life.

Sounds good except I own our apartment and I’ve got too much stuff to just pack up and run. If I ghost them though, can I still get the wedding cake?