this dog sucks 

fuck your entire life

stop watching porn

fucking make me

me when I drink water to pass a kidney stone

mike’s hard bubble tea

It’s just marbles

Sorry I’m late I was touching soft moss on a stone wall

sign me the fuck up

i’m not against vaping, but man, vaping two inches from my face on the subway is a ridiculous asshole kind of move. this dude was billowing like he was auditioning for the role of haunted house fog machine. the humidity in the whole car changed, he was ruining haircuts. just jump starting the water cycle. condensation was dripping down my glasses. people were slipping off poles, it was chaos. it was like watching one man try to terraform the moon. a planet with one dense, root beer scented atmosphere blocking out the sun and choking all life. 

i consider this a sort of prose poem to be honest