Icarus

reassurance kink bc my brain makes me feel unlovable

how do i stop wasting my devotion

nobody ever talks about bpd and age regression. most people would assume you regress back to childhood, and while that does happen, a lot of us regress back to our sad, miserable teenage years without even really realizing

Daydreaming to cope, but then make everything worse by projecting onto my daydreams, which makes my emotions more intense

Coping? nah I’m raw dogging life with untreated mental illness

fuck i just remembered i’m fundamentally unlovable

What doesn't kill you leaves you bleeding for the rest of your life wishing it did

BPD is a mix of I have so much hate in my veins reserved for me to no one is better than me, I’m the greatest bitch alive, I could fucking surpass God to I’m so dead and numb and I can’t get anything accomplished. how do I function again?

Am I really capable of change or am I doomed to repeat the same cycles because I’m inherently evil and rotten: A novel by me

having quiet bpd sometimes makes me feel stupid or whatever, but god i wish i could express my emotions loudly and unapologetically instead of letting it eat at me forever ..

Like it does bother me how often people's only criticism of forced medication with antipsychotics take place when it explicitly happens outside the context of psychosis like I actually think being forced to take heavily sedating and debilitating meds with often severe side effects against your will indefinitely is still really wrong and traumatizing even when the person in question did hallucinate

what doesnt kill u is just another void in u

crazy how with bpd your expected to shut up, suck it up and suffer alone for your whole life because otherwise you’re a burden and causing stress for other people who don’t deserve it, they treat us like we asked to have bpd and we’re doing it all on purpose

how much fucking clearer do i have to make my abandonment issues for people to stop casually abandoning me as simply as one takes out the trash