Zachary

I bet they make each other laugh all the time. <3

Are you hydrated?  If not, have a glass of water.

Have you eaten in the past three hours?  If not, get some food — something with protein, not just simple carbs.  Perhaps some nuts or hummus?

Have you showered in the past day?  If not, take a shower right now.

If daytime: are you dressed?  If not, put on clean clothes that aren’t pajamas.  Give yourself permission to wear something special, whether it’s a funny t-shirt or a pretty dress.

If nighttime: are you sleepy and fatigued but resisting going to sleep?  Put on pajamas, make yourself cozy in bed with a teddy bear and the sound of falling rain, and close your eyes for fifteen minutes — no electronic screens allowed.  If you’re still awake after that, you can get up again; no pressure.

Have you stretched your legs in the past day?  If not, do so right now.  If you don’t have the spoons for a run or trip to the gym, just walk around the block, then keep walking as long as you please.  If the weather’s crap, drive to a big box store (e.g. Target) and go on a brisk walk through the aisles you normally skip.

Have you said something nice to someone in the past day?  Do so, whether online or in person.  Make it genuine; wait until you see something really wonderful about someone, and tell them about it.

Have you moved your body to music in the past day?  If not, do so — jog for the length of an EDM song at your favorite BPM, or just dance around the room for the length of an upbeat song.

Have you cuddled a living being in the past two days?  If not, do so.  Don’t be afraid to ask for hugs from friends or friends’ pets.  Most of them will enjoy the cuddles too; you’re not imposing on them.

Do you feel ineffective?  Pause right now and get something small completed, whether it’s responding to an e-mail, loading up the dishwasher, or packing your gym bag for your next trip.  Good job!

Do you feel unattractive?  Take a goddamn selfie.  Your friends will remind you how great you look, and you’ll fight society’s restrictions on what beauty can look like.

Do you feel paralyzed by indecision?  Give yourself ten minutes to sit back and figure out a game plan for the day.  If a particular decision or problem is still being a roadblock, simply set it aside for now, and pick something else that seems doable.  Right now, the important part is to break through that stasis, even if it means doing something trivial.

Have you seen a therapist in the past few days?  If not, hang on until your next therapy visit and talk through things then.

Have you been over-exerting yourself lately — physically, emotionally, socially, or intellectually?  That can take a toll that lingers for days. Give yourself a break in that area, whether it’s physical rest, taking time alone, or relaxing with some silly entertainment.

Have you changed any of your medications in the past couple of weeks, including skipped doses or a change in generic prescription brand?  That may be screwing with your head.  Give things a few days, then talk to your doctor if it doesn’t settle down.

Have you waited a week?  Sometimes our perception of life is skewed, and we can’t even tell that we’re not thinking clearly, and there’s no obvious external cause.  It happens.  Keep yourself going for a full week, whatever it takes, and see if you still feel the same way then.

You’ve made it this far, and you will make it through.  You are stronger than you think.

This post is available as a downloadable one-page PDF here.

it’s okay to have fat, because it’s natural and it doesn’t make you ugly or unlovable

stretch marks, scars, moles, etc are totally ok

your body is wonderful exactly the way it is

please be kind to yourself

First of all, what is a liminal space? A liminal space refers to a place or time that is in a period of transition between two phases. These are usually places where reality feels altered because you are neither moving forward or backward, like a rest stop. The word liminal originates from the Latin word limens, meaning threshold. These places often give off a sense that time stands still and that you are experiencing some sort of reality shift. 

        In magic and witchcraft these spaces are considered to be the boundary between our world and the other, it is known as “the in-between”. These places are considered areas of great magic because it is believed this is where the veil is thin. These places are great for divination, spirit work, meditation and astral travel; they are ideal for hedge witchcraft.

Times & Spaces of Liminality:

crossroads manmade or natural

river, creek or lake shores/ beaches

hallway/corridor/stairwells/landings/doorways

graveyards

dawn, dusk, afternoon, midnight

valleys

forest glades

many more!

      Samhain/Halloween is considered the best time to communicate with spirits and faeries because of its liminality, it is a time of transition between autumn and winter. Irish folklore tells that this is the day faeries and ghosts come out to play because of the veil thinning. The equinoxes and sabbats like Beltane and Imbolc are also days of liminality because the time of day and night are equal (equinoxes) or it is a transition between seasons.  

       Mental states of liminality are also times of spirit communication. While being in a meditative state we are in a state of transition between our concious and sub-concious minds, this is where we sometimes experience astral projection or messages from spirits. People often experience spirit while falling asleep because this is another state of liminality. 

     In my craft I often practice in liminality in order to connect with the faerie realms.

“She didn’t stop!”

If you ricochet off the side of a moving wheelchair, YOU ARE AT FAULT.

But apparently because you’re Abled you’ve decided to go ahead and try to Ablesplain this situation to me.

Because in your Ableist reality the disabled person is responsible for speeding up or slowing down while the Abled person plows right through in a straight line.

Which is exactly the point I was making.

Abled people do not have right of way over people in wheelchairs.

You don’t get to bitch that we didn’t stop when you come out of left field and crash in to us/our mobility aids.

I stopped making way for men a long long time ago (back when I was walking), which if you haven’t tried it makes for a lot of collisions and a lot of pissed off entitled assholes.

Pro tip: when colliding with entitled men, lead with your shoulder.

It’s interesting how women can see that this is an issue when men do it, but somehow Ableds are still going to Ablesplain to me how disabled people should get out of their way. I’m no more interested in the entitlement Ableds have towards disabled people than I am in the entitlement men have towards women.

If you think I’m going to make way for Ableds now that I use a wheelchair any more than I made way for men when I was walking, you’re in for a surprise.

And in the vast majority of cases, an abled person can move easier and quicker than someone in a wheelchair.

And yes we can’t stop immediately - if you step in front of me and stop imma run you over while trying to stop. Your fault.