you don't scare me anymore

I really like this scene because it’s coy and direct at the same time, like May and Tommy both know why he’s there, he wasn’t “in the area”, this wasn’t a “stop along the way”, he starts with those things-you-say excuses when he first arrives and May pokes holes in them

so he does the same thing with discussing the petrol, and it’s so fun because neither one of them are allowing the other to hide behind excuses and pretenses, they are both like, if this is something you want to do, if I am someone you want to spend time with - in whatever capacity - then be honest about it, tell me, say it, except at the same time, they’re still not quite saying it, they’re still flirting and talking around what’s drawn them to each other.

Which leads to, I have seen a couple of takes about how May “uses” Tommy or sees him as a tool or as a means to an end because of this exchange with Grace

and I always thought that was reductive because Tommy wants to make her feel alive, we see it with this exchange:

and I appreciate it because 1) I think there’s a level of recognition, considering that Tommy sees himself and there is this perception of Tommy as a sort of island unto himself

2) that look suggests, ‘Well, I’m not like ‘anyone’, I won’t steer clear and then

3) it finally leads to the bluntness. Now after briefly consoling her

and after she sort of admits a view of herself as isolated and ghost-like, now he’s telling her that they are going to have sex that night 

i.e. “you’re not a fucking lighthouse keeper”

This leads me to their first exchange, which sets the tone for all of their conversations afterwards because it’s straightforward but also under pretense at the exact same time.

They’re talking about the filly and they are certainly both interested and love horses so that’s not only an excuse to talk but they’re also sizing each other up and letting the other know of their interest, like when Tommy confirms that the man with May is her father and not her husband

or when May let’s Tommy know she’s unencumbered because her husband is dead:

and then when they end the conversation: 

Tommy plays coy but is also saying don’t be coy, you know what I do even if you don’t know what I do:

I also found this exchange interesting because he brings up the idea of whether or not May wants to slum it with him:

and although she is attracted to him and wants to have sex with him so her saying otherwise is a lie (although she also really is there for the horse)

it’s not really about the class difference, the thrill of him being a gangster, I think it’s actually about him and the conversations they can have

which is why it’s after this conversation that he makes a “small diversion” to her house. 

I won’t turn this into a Grace-bashing post even though I hated her character and their “relationship” haha, but there’s this sense that Grace knew Tommy because of this:

and I won’t even get into my problems with that entire storyline but May recognized something in Tommy:

that his other love interests claim to understand and yet seem to be constantly surprised by:

I don’t know the episodes of series 6 well enough to find the parts I’m looking for but Lizzie essentially always seemed to be surprised/disappointed by the way Tommy behaved/grieved Ruby and/or Polly when there’s honestly no indication that he’s responding to things differently than how he normally would (despite the dialogue saying otherwise with nothing to back it up) except for him abstaining from whiskey instead of constantly self-medicating.

I’ve also already spoken about how I feel like there’s a certain earnestness and softness and courtesy that he expresses with May

and that he actually does feels like he’s  lighter with her

(and she gets goldfish because she thinks it would make him smile)

and that he also understands her stubbornness and unwillingness to back down as qualities that he has in himself

as opposed to: Something I never got over is when Grace visits from the States and Tommy calls Campbell to rub it in his face that he was about to fuck her, I was like, oh but she’s supposed to be “different”? He’s supposed to be different with her? Where?

but this part

because he could’ve just left, he could’ve made a clean break but he decides to stay 

and sure, Tommy loves the ladies but if he simply wanted female company then he could’ve done what we’ve seen him do, which is pay for the services of a sex worker or, frankly, it seems like he could’ve just spent the night at Lizzie’s but he chooses to stay.

I also think this part is telling because it keeps up with the honesty of their relationship, she knows what he may be thinking and she’s unashamed:

and then their moment together at the Derby, I think it’s so telling that he needs her to know that the time they had together was good and that there are no regrets between them

and the little arm touch!