I don’t know why I’m writing this because I kind of gave up on this blog forever ago. You can take this an unnecessary life update that nobody asked for 💁♂️
It’s almost 2am I’m currently 24 and enlisted in the marines as of August I think? I can’t remember rn lol
I think my life really started changing after I broke up with my ex. Messy break up and I ended it pretty shitty but it is what it is now 🤷♂️
That break up broke me but I think in the long run I needed it. That was 2+ years ago now but it feels like it was a lifetime ago instead.
Even tho I don’t feel like I don’t believe in God anymore, I stopped going to church. I stopped going earlier this year. After the break up life was really dark for me. I almost rammed my car into a light pole, I was googling ways to kill my self and if you couldn’t tell now I was a total mess, in some way I still am but a happy mess ? Haha. Life goes on as they say
I used to be so involved in church but I started questioning God a lot in 2016. Pretty much all of my friends were at that church but towards the end of 2016 and since then I started seeing who were really my friends. I had a lot of issues with people there and so many people were seeming to turn against me that I finally just left after a year of thinking about leaving.
I currently work at a data cabling company and spend way too much money on games, records and electronics but oh well that’s nothing new I guess haha
But yea I work 40-60 hours a week and have no friends anymore. I don’t have anyone who really hits me up or checks up on me. I just kind of live in my own head in isolation waiting for boot camp to come in November. I get sad when ever I stop and think about it so instead I buy and do things to distract my self
I leave for boot camp November 12th to become a marine. The military isn’t going to solve all of my problems. Hopefully tho it does help with my finances 🤷♂️💁♂️😂😂
Again I feel like this is pointless . This blog has been dead for so long and I don’t see how anyone would even still be paying attention.
I do miss the days I had friends even the virtual ones I had on here. Most of the relationships I developed on here though have dicipated. No one talks to me anymore and it sucks lol.
I think about what I’ve done with my life and how much I messed up and I just wish I could go back and fix all the pain I’ve brought people in life. They didn’t diserve it and I have a hard time believing anyone would a guy as shitty as me but like they say, life goes on
Maybe I should just delete this blog?
“Till next time space cow boy ✌️”
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