MINE. 

Now these are the stats I care about

The hands. The Home Depot spackling tools. The RAW taco seasoning. I’m....

we’ve all done this

Imagine going to a party and you see this bitch doing this on the counter

In cars two at the airport the cars have to go through tsa checks and take off their wheels and stuff which implies the cars Universe had a 9/11

Wait. Oh my god. But planes are sentient in the cars universe. Did cars hijack the plane or did the planes fly themselves.

Nobody knows

Buddy they have car pope. A car jesus died on a car cross and we’re worried if car bush did car 9/11

I could not comprehend a word of this initially and I thought I was having a stroke

anyone else got problems

no you’re the only one

ok. sorry

before i hit play i was like “I’m sure ‘bad music’ is subjective” … and then

This is me every time I’m making a new song on garage band for iPhone

im losing my mind….shes jus a lil baby…

What’s the most simple thing you’ve ever had to explain to a fully competent adult?

That you cannot fax money to someone.

Had someone accidentally fax us some paperwork. They then asked if we would fax it back due to the paperwork being confidential…

I have received a fax in an envelope. like… they took the documents, put em in an envelope, then faxed me a picture of the sealed envelope.

That’s one of the cutest things I’ve ever heard.

I like that this just turned into stories about faxing