Grapey

Thinking about Rhaena Targaryen, who no matter how perfect of a lady she was, she felt like by virtue of birth, she was born losing.

Baela got the cradle dragon, and got the future king.

Lucerys got Driftmark.

You got the love of everyone.

Jacaerys got you.

It was supposed to be a secret, but the walls of Dragonstone had eyes, ears and lips. And even without the aid of the walls, Jacaerys Velaryon had eyes, and the way that they looked at you was enough to put two and two together.

He had been bethroted to Baela since infancy, but his eyes had followed you. And Baela, far from helpless, wished to share. But not share her husband, share you.

The fondness she had for Jacaerys paled in comparison to her love for you. Not everyone knew that.

But Rhaena did.

She was sure you had kissed Jace, maybe once, maybe often, but she itched to know when, and how, and how it had felt, how you had tasted, if you had been shy or eager, or both. And most importantly, she itched to know if she would ever know.

Jacaerys had kissed you, surely, Baela perhaps did.

But Rhaena hadn't.

She followed your gaze at dinner, to find you looking at Jacaerys like a pup in love and she wanted to feel rage, but she felt only heartbreak.

And still a part of her was glad you chose him, because he was sweet and gentlemanly and perfect.

A perfect young man.

And Rhaena could never be that. Because Rhaena was a perfect lady.

And still Rhaena was the one you talked to when you couldn't sleep, Rhaena was the one you sneaked out with, Rhaena was the one who braided your hair as she laid seated at the frame of your bed, Rhaena was always with you.

Or at least she used to be.

You were no longer hers, perhaps you had never been, but she will be eternally yours. Quietly, longingly, yours.

And when she saw you one day, your face hidden in his chest, giggling and with kiss-swollen lips, she knew.

Rhaena knew that she had been born losing.

And after he died, after you died, not once having given her a shy kiss, or an eager kiss, or none. She knew she had been born losing.

And in lonely nights, where she could no longer hear your laugh, or braid your hair, or tell you she loved you, she tried to comfort herself by thinking that even if you died his, a part of you had been hers. She needs to believe it was.

In the end, you and Jacaerys left together.

1. I think it fits really nicely, especially because it sounds like someone piecing together history ans trying to bring humanity to the almost-martyr that reader was. Perhaps it's Sansa, perhaps it's Daena, finding a book about reader while she's in the maidenvault. Reader is especially tragic because she was so loved by everyone around her, and though she can take any path, because she represents you, the core element of her is how much she loved her family, and how trusting she became because of it. Even when she's not being a perfect angel, she is not someone one could ever call "bad" or "evil". She was so loved and yet her death brought so much suffering for the people she wanted to protect.

2. You're so right, this is Daeron and though in less capacity, Aemond as well.

I think the both of them were really messed up by the concept of "being a man". For Daeron, being a man was having unshakable honor, and that honor was not flexible enough to let him run away with reader, which led to her death.

And for Aemond, being a man is seizing what you want, being dominating so you, and those around you, can never feel insecure or unsafe. Aemond's concept of masculinity, since is more about a state (the state of being "undefeated") than principles, it's fragile, and that's why he reacts so badly to reader leaving him, if he allows her that, he will no longer be a man.

So in short:

Daeron: Are you man enough to accept that your honor and righteous behavior killed the one you loved? And not mourn the reality where you betrayed your concept of masculinity for love?

Aemond: Are you man enough to take the hate of a person you have always tried to please, and from whom you crave love and understanding, so you can remain a man? So you can remain her man?

3. Ok I adore this song for this theme.

It fits very well, and I think it would fit everyone 😭 but for different reasons

Criston: "And I dare you to tell her

Won't you tell her she was wrong?

And I dare you to wake up

And pretend she isn't gone."

Criston wants to draw the parallel between reader and youbg Rhaenyra, he really wants to. He wants to think that reader had it coming for disobeying, for trying to bring down Daeron with her as well. But he can't.

He can't think of her without feeling guilty, much less speak against her. In the same vein, I think he also mourns Aemond, he raised the boy and was probably more of a father to him than Viserys after the whole eye incident. So now, seeing him destroyed for his own ambition, for his own fear of vulnerability... Was Criston responsible for this?

Otto: "And that girl in the mirror

She's the one that I hate the most

And I'm beginning to fear her

Now that love's become a ghost"

He, along with Alicent orchestrated the usurpation, knowing a conflict could break out, Otto and Alicent traded reader for Aegon, knowing the kind of man Aemond was.

The life of a bastard girl, for a king, to Otto, is a more than fair exchange. So why is he being haunted by her? Why does he keep hearing her voice from back when she was the little princess of Flea Bottom?

Rhaenyra, Rhaena, and Joffrey: "Now, that girl in the mirror

She's the one that I miss the most

And she appears so much clearer

Tonight, love becomes a ghost"

They are haunted as well, but not guilt. Her fate was not directly in their hands, and that might be worse. They can mourn and they can curse out, but they know that there was no way for them to know, no way for them to stop it all.

Aegon: "Don't you dare ever tell me

Don't you tell me I was wrong

Cause I'd rather keep sleeping

I'll pretend she isn't gone"

Aegon is probably the one that is most in denial. He drowns his grief in cups and milk of the poppy, he wanders life almost as if he is a ghost himself.

But he doesn't pity reader like others, instead he makes it about himself. Why was reader not given to him? Aegon would have made her happy, Aegon loved her more than Aemond. Surely Aemond didn't love her, and surely she would have never ran away had Aegon been her husband.

If he wore the conqueror's crown, name and sword. Then why could he not have two wives? Why was he denied his Rhaenys?

Reader called him a knight when she was little. What is left of him is a drunken, broken fool. He wishes he could have made reader see him as a knight just one more time before he died.

Aegon the younger and Viserys: (She's not dead, she's alright) oh

(She's just sleeping, just sleeping) oh

(She's not dead, she's alright) oh

(She's just sleeping, just sleeping) oh

They are far too young to really understand, especially Viserys. So when their parents say their sisters is "gone", they naturally think you will come back.

And even once they grow old enough to comprehend what happened, and not only your death but everyone else's.... for some reason they keep thinking you will come back.

4. Ok I love you for mentioning Rhaena

And yes, I think it fits her so very well. Both during and after the war, she probably was in the best position. She was safe, she pampered, and tourneys were celebrated in her honor, and after the war, she is the only one in the world with a living dragon, and she married for love.

Yet she still feels like a loser.

I'm getting a lot of Robert Baratheon vibes from her, in the sense that she might be alive and well, but a part of her died with her family, and she will never be able to have it back.

Can you imagine Rhaena seeing Morning's egg crack open for the first time? All her prayers finally answered in the form of a hatchling that is barely bigger than her own hand, and she excitedly looks around to share this joy, only to realize she is alone. Her mother is not here, her sisters are not here, neither are her father and stepbrothers.

And when Morning is finally big enough to ride, she enjoys the wind on her face, the freedom of it all. She now knows why Baela cut her hair, as she winces when she feels her hair flying into her mouth.

Morning might have been the fastest dragon in the world, and no one is there to attest to it. No races with Moondancer and Dagahrion, no reason to teach her dragon air maneuvers, no excitement to see who will become Morning's mate. Nothing.

5. LITTLE SIBLINGS I'M DYING 💔💔💔

"You were bigger and brighter and wider than snow

You screamed at the make-believe, screamed at the sky

And you finally found all your courage to let it all go."

They know more about reader than anyone else alive, and less of her than anyone else who is dead. Their sister is almost a fairytale, they never got to truly know her. Baela only speks of her when drunk, Rhaena can hardly do so without crying. And they will never understand how much she would have loved them.

"Slow drowned, you were angels

So much more than everything

Hold for the last time then slip away quietly

Open my eyes, but I never see anything."

This is Viserys. The youngest, the one with less memories, and the one who only remembers his older siblings as heroes, bright and bold and brave. And dead.

Viserys learned far too early on, that heroes exist, but they seldom win.

6. YES

Alicent bets on losing dogs, in Helaena, Aemond and reader. Because she herself was a losing dog, she goes for the vulnerable ones, hoping to save them, but is like as if all that her hands touch is cursed.

"Where I'll be looking in their eyes when they're down

I'll be there on their side."

Alicent wonders if you being raised by her would have prevented all this, or on the contrary, only ruin you before you were even on the ground.

7. I think this is definitely Jace, but let me introduce a third option: Daemon.

"The apple falls far from the tree

she's rotten and so beautiful

I'd like to keep her here with me

and tell her that she's beautiful"