the clown makeup is permanent

hate when I type :) and this 🙂 fucker appears. Go away you evil soul

“scientists don’t want you know” is a phrase that always cracks me up because if you actually meet a scientist they will be shaking and crying like an overstimulated chihuahua with the need to let you know

big fan of whatever the youth is doing to torment scientology buildings

if you go looking for doom and gloom all you will see is doom and gloom. if you go looking for reduced items at the grocery store you may find a littol treat

“there’s an ai tool for that” okay ?? there’s probably an ed sheeran song for it too who gives a fuck

hey did ya'll know that ed sheeran is working on a series of 6 albums named after media player buttons and the first one released last year and the last one is to be released posthumously on the day that he dies

That doesn't sound right but I don't know enough about Ed Sheeran to prove otherwise

what do you mean i get to come home after a yoga class and take a shower while a beautiful girl cooks me dinner and then we watch a movie together!!!!!!!????????

AND SHE LIKES ME BACK AND WE GET TO MAKE OUT ALL THE TIME NOW!!!!!!!!!!

update: she’s officially my girlfriend :)

How do I explain Plato's allegory of the cave to my cat?

i'm gonna keep it real with u guys i don't think we're ever becoming the new pdf like this

what do you mean i get to come home after a yoga class and take a shower while a beautiful girl cooks me dinner and then we watch a movie together!!!!!!!????????

AND SHE LIKES ME BACK AND WE GET TO MAKE OUT ALL THE TIME NOW!!!!!!!!!!

im completely addicted to Open Link in New Tab

if Open Link in New Tab is wrong then baby i dont want to be right