fairweatherprincess

everyonez welcome ꉂ(˵˃ ᗜ ˂˵)

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just to Be. Lear.

can I feel fucking normal for one day??

TW: huge rant, mentions of meltdown/breaking points, generally a hard read

I’ve been finding moving on very difficult. Then again, it’s only been a week. I’ve never wanted someone to come back more than I do now. Not even necessarily to be my boyfriend again I just miss talking to him. I miss him so much. I feel so fucking sick, completely ill without him. I would tell him everything, now I just feel like it was such a waste. hopefully my medication helps me feel less like I’m ready to end it all lol.

I had a meltdown when he broke up with me, it felt like my entire world was collapsing. I sobbed and screamed and asked him “why”, over and over. I wish he hadn’t handled it with such patience. I’d rather him be genuinely evil than still such a kind person. it’s completely unfair and confusing. I wish he was able to give a better explanation. And I wish he didn’t have to struggle and figure things out without me. I wish our relationship didn’t feel like such a weight. a part of me thinks that I’ll never get that back, I pray I’m wrong.