So homo

Have fun in the war dumbass I’ll be at home fucking military wives

Damn. Good way to get your fucking windows kicked in

shut the fuck up and raise my son bootlicker

All fun and games until someone with 3 confirmed kills shows up at your doorstep with a baseball bat

im not at my house tho, im at yours with your wife

But he’s got shooters all over the world 🌎 even when he’s away

just shot a load in his wife

You ungrateful asshole. My bf might be fighting for your freedom and you’re here mocking him for keeping your pathetic ass safe from the threats of the world. If a war comes to our country, we’re not saving you, you dumbass ungrateful fuck up of a human being.

Your bf is fighting for oil and killing civilians and probably cheating on you he’s a scumbag, which is why I just fucked his mom to make a better son

Can I get the name of this song?

*Sitting in front of my computer like a Jarl from Skyrim*

I can’t think of a worse mod

Jesus

I bet those two are couple now..

I’m gay

me too

This is such a great story

Me, wearing a blanket as a cloak, stirring my mac'n'cheese in a dimly lit room: potion

as funny as “those are his hooves you bitch” I’m mad that it overshadows that lil wayne really did have socks on in a jacuzzi 

can y'all stop just throwing random words together and expecting us to understand it

you had to be there

Cargo shorts are one of the ugliest clothes ever invented. Next to overalls.

Cargo Shorts are useful when you’re meeting a white bear in the desert and have to carry Gun Oil, condoms, weed, a crowler of craft beer and your 3DS XL with pokemon moon so

Just carry a purse…

But I told him I was masc :(

:(

intellectually its fine for cishet people to refer to their cishet s/o as their ‘partner’ bc it helps normalize the phrase and allows gay/bi people leeway in terms of not outing themselves while also not lying but like. emotionally the toll of someone saying ‘partner’ and meaning her cishet bearded microbrew hipster boyfriend whos into pegging is like. severe

Why does he have two bottles of mouthwash?

Ones for his ass

Alcohol free, peppermint fresh, accurate 😂

that one extremely homoerotic painting of a babylonian man listening to a babylonian twink playing babylonian harp. that one

this is my favorite painting full stop

that “babylonian twink” is King David

The baffled twink composing Hallelujah

y'all have issues