Reading is a Bloodsport

This is physically sickening.

Totally, especially because it’s pretty clear they don’t intend to keep these children with their parents at all, hence only carseats. 

So my new English professor is my uncle only he has no idea because he hasn’t talked to my mom in about 20 years so do you think is should tell him

You know what nevermind he’s a dick I’m going to talk to my mom to get dirt on him so I can blackmail him if the need arises

You should write a story about a boy for an assignment and include loads of life details about him that your mum tells you so that it’s obviously him but change all the names then hand it in and be really confused if he questions you about it

Oh my god

I think this tweet does its own point a disservice by not adding that Lord Falconer was formerly the Shadow Minister of Justice

I’m so glad this implies that we can go beat the up with really large swords

The funniest thing is Oblivion is widely remembered for being unable to create decent looking faces. The fact that this is so amazingly accurate… Just what IS Ted Cruz?

WISHBONE WAS SO LEGIT.

please be careful with these, they’re antiques