his perfection 🖤

The next time he sees me I’ll be smaller I promise. 🖤

I’m so fucking stupid

My friend made me eat real dinner tonight. He’s clearly catching on and worried about me but he also knows I’m fat as fuck so I don’t know why he cares. Now I’m nauseous and hate myself even more yay

I don’t get it. I have such a good day. I go swimming and walk along the pier and stay under 500 calories and I feel like I’m on top of the world. But I can’t stop thinking about him. I have everything right now, things are so good. But I can’t stop thinking about him. Missing him. And the stupid thing is I’m the one who walked away. I know it wouldn’t work, I’ve seen that it didn’t work. But that doesn’t stop me from thinking about how good it felt when things were good. From missing him. It’s so stupid to still be this heartbroken but holy fuck I think I’m going to love him forever. I would give everything for him to still be the guy I fell in love with.

Put on fake nails tonight that are so long I can’t do anything but most importantly eat. Tho if anyone has tips on how to game with them lord knows I need help lmao

Why does food have so many calories good god

Tried psyllium husk this morning and now I’m convinced I’m going to choke and die I love having health anxiety lmao

Alright well won’t be pretty by summer at this rate but time to lock back in

After four months of no contact my boyfriend wants to get back together and I know it’s a terrible idea but I want to so badly. I feel like my heart has been ripped from my chest a second time

How am I down 2.5 pounds this morning when I also started my period today? Surely my body is pranking me

Has anyone ever completely refreshed their tumblrs? My feed is so dead and I wanna follow new people but don’t even know where to start with finding them