pumpin'

I just love barking so I really couldn’t give a fuck if this is the right tree or not haha

i hate it when the ball is in my court get that shit out of here

pokes your dinner gland

WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHARKS HAVE BEEN AROUND THE GALAXY TWICE

It’s a very good design

has anyone figured out how to turn off the thing where you love your pet so much it slides inexorably into grief-borrowing

“For me this glass is already broken. I enjoy it; I drink out of it. It holds my water admirably, sometimes even reflecting the sun in beautiful patterns. If I should tap it, it has a lovely ring to it. But when I put this glass on the shelf and the wind knocks it over or my elbow brushes it off the table and it falls to the ground and shatters, I say, ‘Of course.’ When I understand that the glass is already broken, every moment with it is precious.”

went to the ER cause I got punched in the head by a mouse

i havent seen the strong as fuck ice mummy in a while. i hope shes doing ok

spring thaw. weak as fuck water mummy now

i love the phrase "sex pervert" like. as opposed to what? abstinence pervert?

i think they're called catholics