avp presents —

welcome to the jungle. i can’t speak to games, but we do have fun. but fun doesn’t mean willy nilly chaos. no, there are some rules. i like following the rules. it makes me feel nice.

name: vesta

age: old

timezone: est

activity: i work full time, and working towards getting a store of my own as well. i'm also a part time student, and serve as cook, housekeeper, driver, and secretary for my 87 year old father. do i have free time? no. do i still want to write and interact? yep. so as long as everyone is chill with expected lag, we're good. think of it as insanely laid back. and if no one has told you today, i love you.

also-

i get enough gossip drama at work, i have zero interest in being involved with it here. that said, legit concerns will always be noted, and if appropriate, shared or added to.

additionally, i will not reply to messages or ims that shuffle the bare minimum effort together in the form of “wanna play :)” because no, i do not. not with you. begone.

finally-

Insta - vestaandpals

Email - [email protected]

Fbook / text / bondage dot com / etc - ask via email

Me, after my medical leave: one job, two stores, three departments, 60-70 hour work weeks, no light on the horizon, resigned.

But instead of that boring stuff, they had her BRUTALLY tortured and killed. Not just killed, HUMILIATINGLY killed. Pointedly left physically exposed, blatant use of a penetrating object, -a crossbow bolt through her breast. The implication that Ros would have been cut down and thrown out with the trash, no one even speaking her name. No years shed, no mention made anywhere. One beautiful, intelligent, shockingly educated AND clever woman, discarded like trash.

I think about that often. More lately, actually, as Esme stood up, saying no, I will not be a victim. It's a kind of bravery I'm struggling along to get to, myself. And just like Wendy Case (Sons of Anarchy) is a fictional, flawed character fighting tooth and nail to get clean, I understand her desperation, I remember believing, as us addicts often do, endlessly feeling the need to prove ourselves worthy in the eyes of people we respect, like getting that approval had some kind of value, or guarantee a place at the table of family and friends that our addiction had lost us. In the case of Ros and Esme herself, she's spoken out, not loudly, but with purpose, which is something I still can't do, nearly seven years since I managed to muster the fragile strength of my own to escape my own nightmare of abuse.