Treee Monkeeeys

we opened at 11 this morning. i watched an old man literally pry the fucking sliding doors open at 10:43 and stand there just staring into the empty store and my coworker & i were like sir. for the love of fuck

I worked in a restaurant for while and a woman climbed past an A board sign, ignored the sign on a the door saying the opening times and trotted on in. When told we were not open she asked why the door was unlocked. My manager explained that it has to be unlocked when people are in the building to comply with fire regulations. Which lead to my favourite exchange with a customer: Woman: But there are no people in here. Manager: Madam. The staff count as people. Woman: That’s ridiculous. *Storms out*

“The staff count as people” has me dead

it’s so nice when toxic people stop talking to you it’s like the trash took itself out

do waitresses know that i love them and appreciate everything they do

i had the nicest waitress today who told me my outfit was cute and i wish i was rich cuz I would’ve tipped her so much more if I could

If you ever actually wanna help your waitress out, ask to speak to their manager before you leave and then tell the manager how awesome they are. Trust me, it makes a difference. Servers who get compliments from guests and customers get better hours, and the more you’re liked by the people who come in the more forgiving the bosses are when shit goes awry (say if you’re sick or you have a flat so you’re late, etc). Tell the manager. Do it! Aside from tipping it’s one of the best things you can do for us. Tell the manager you thought we were great. Tell the manager that we’re the reason you’re gonna come back. Talk us up! It’s a little like job security - if you tell the manager we’re the reason you’re here, they’re gonna be a lot more reluctant to let us go because then they’re losing your business, and they don’t want that. 

this is good advice, thank you 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

“resting bitch face” or, as i like to call it, “a woman that isn’t smiling”

People become attractive over time as you get to know them. Someone who you once felt completely neutral towards can make your stomach do somersaults. It’s not that they were not good looking to begin with, it’s just that things happened which made your conscience ease up and your heart changed. Good character can contribute to how someone perceives you.

at work we have a family of three huskies who come in for daycare and everyone calls them “the mafia” it makes me so happy because occasionally out of nowhere someone over the radios will say “we’re sending in the mafia” and then three huskies barrel their way inside and usually slip and fall on the tile ajfjajg

this is the only pure post

I wanna be in love but also yikes

best sleeping conditions: freezing cold room but layers and layers of blankets

When you load up on caffeine to make yourself less sad, but instead you just get Accelerated Depression™

I love how fucking abstract the concept of Accelerated Depression is. Like, it’s vague as fuck, but we all know what tf it feels like