you, me, hearts, minds. let's make it happen

PS: Everyone is allowed to selfship in whatever way they want!! For selfshippers that feel like many of the posts you see are unrealistic and don’t reflect you and your F/O’s relationship, here are some honest and nuanced messages.

“Your F/O would never get angry with you.” -> When your F/O gets mad, they have a special tone reserved only for you. It holds you gently even when it’s firm, and maintains control without sacrificing honesty. The depth of their affection for you is evident in so many ways, including the way they approach conflict with you. Even when the feelings might be negative, you can always see the love attached to them.

“Your F/O would never think you’re weird.” -> Your F/O LOVES how weird you are!! Your uniqueness is what draws them to you, and sets you apart from the sea of people they could have chosen. Whether or not your quirks get on their nerves sometimes is insignificant; they’re just so happy to have them all memorized.

“Your F/O would never overstep your boundaries!” -> Your F/O watches you and listens to you closely. Even if they’re not perfect, they notice small changes within you and care about you—even if it means adapting to things they’re not used to doing. They intend to keep learning more about you for the rest of their life, and there’s no sign of them ever getting bored. They always repair things with you, and this will never ever change.

“Your F/O would never feel put out by you.” -> You are worth the effort. Every single time. Even when the tasks themselves feel burdensome, you are always worth the effort it takes to help you and take care of you. It is paid back tenfold every time they get to see you joyful and healthy. [Disabled self shippers I am looking at you!]

If you start feeling insecure about your selfship, or feel like you’re being annoying with about it, I would suggest on turning your focus inward and returning back on your F/O. Here are some ways I would suggest doing that:

— Write a fic. You don’t have to post it anywhere! It can just be for you. It can take any form you want: a short story, a multi chapter fic, or even just a dialogue only ficlet. Maybe make a little graphic for it if that’s something you like doing.

— Make a moodboard. Again, you don’t have to post it anywhere if you don’t want to! Perhaps also consider making a private Pinterest board if you want.

— Make a Spotify playlist. I’m probably biased, because this is one of my favorite things to do. But finding a song that fits your ship can be a rush like no other lol.

— Read fics that others have written about your F/O. I know this can sometimes be a challenge if your F/O is more niche or from a less active fandom. It can also be tricky if you’re nonsharing and don’t enjoy canon x canon stuff. But sometimes, if you dig, especially through older posts, old Livejournal communities, and old fanfic communities, you can find little hidden gems.

— Return to the Sacred Texts (aka the source material lol). I know this might be obvious, but imo you can often pick up on new things if you revisit the source material. You can even take notes on particular moments you like or analyzing favorite character scenes.

I’m sure there’s more you can do, but these are some things that sometimes help me! :)

As one last side note: I would suggest not engaging with AI character bots as a way to reconnect with your F/O. I fell into this trap in the past and found it to be very unhealthy for a variety of reasons. I avoid this now. Take care out there, babes!

you ever selfship with a fortnite character? me neither ↻(𓄼 .̀ ̮.́)Ψ