mind words

I wanna introduce a new and fun concept, we’ve got an ancient brain that’s working in modern time, and our ancient brain isn’t as fast as adapting as modern technology, it’s rapidly changing. So our ancient brain is designed for survival, informations coming to your brain in two ways, the high road or the low road. The high road is done to your thinking brain, and the low road is down to the amygdala, the emotions centre of the brain, and it’s coming to the fight flight response mechanism, at twice as speed, informations coming to the amygdala is twice as much and twice as fast before getting it to the thinking brain. So what happens now, is you gating out, no this is it, no this is it, this is okay, this is okay. So our brain is designed to figure out if we’re gonna be safe here or not, so what is our modern day fear? FOPO... Fear of Other People Opinion. What other human thinks of us... What do we do to protect ourselves, we become hypercritical of ourselves. We’re beating ourselves up and tenderising ourselves up in not a good way, so that we don’t face those casualties publicly. Our brain is great at picking up these signals from other people... so that we can adjust and provide some sort of mechanism to protect from being exposed of not being good enough. So our job... is to love others and not give a shit of what they think of us, but not in a cold way, but to really love other people, because we only get one emotion at a time. Either you are anxious or you are joyful, you can’t get the two at the same time. So our job is really to find the right state we want to be in, the right emotional place, and use that and rather let the brain win. And the brain wins by saying, what are they thinking, what are they thinking... Am I safe? Am I safe? Am I safe? And if that is untrained and unconditioned, it will win. 

The fact you get to do what you love, for other people.

Why could this potentially happening for me? So, I believe if we don’t get message from the resistance, from what’s going on, it’s going to keep on coming into your life in different forms, whether it’s a person, another business issue, some relationships in your life, it’s gonna keep on coming trying deliver this message till you get it, or if you don’t get it, it’s gonna whack you over the head like a 2 by 4. 

So you could live the nudge life, or you could live the 2 by 4 life when the nudges comes I kinda like “Ok, I get it, why are you here?” I always wanna know why is this here, why is this resistance for? Because without resistance, there’s no way to build muscle, there’s no strength. We asked for this amazing beautiful life, we asked for this incredible relationship, but when the challenges that actually makes us better people come, we’re like, why is this here? why is this coming? Well, it’s coming so you could go to your next level. Cause without it, you’ll never be able to handle what’s coming on the next level right? Next level life comes with next level problem. You’d have to already have gone through those to understand how to deal with what’s going on. 

Without those hard times, you don’t really get the euphoria on the other sides. It’s learning to accept and love the entire journey along the way, and to me the faster I can accept the things coming into my space, that is blissful. Like I can look on my day and “wow that was pretty crappy day” and I still did, that was I kinda floated through it, floated through it more, with ease, and I am so proud of myself. The realisation that it’s all for us, it is all for us, and the day the day is the bliss.

That was my 2 by 4 moments, you’re not gonna get it, unless something really big happens to you. You can’t rob someone out of their rock bottom. I look back to my rock bottom, without it, I could not do the work that I do, I could not find myself, my entire purpose on this planet. So your rock bottom is when literally, there is nothing else.. Your whole reason you’re here can finally come through. Because you’re stripped of everything and all you have is the internal, like that is it. When you have all external stripped away, you can finally figure out, if you asked yourself “Okay, if all I have is me, all I have is what I can do with this body, how I can connect to whatever you believe in, that’s all you have to use... And that’s when you get the most clear answer, everything else is gone.

What can have not done in your life if you were on your death bed? Like, what is the biggest thing you need to do? 

Your work is to release the one you want it so bad, so you can find the ones who are ready. You pour your whole life, your whole self into them, and you’ll leave dry, you’ll leave empty, because they have to be equal energy on that path. Like, they have to meet you. That was my journey with my family, if I go back and try to pour things again, I’ll lose my self. 

What if you just freed yourself? How powerful would that be, if I could just get through this, for all the people in the world? I have to show that how much that I thought I couldn’t and changed it for myself and rewrite the story, to let them know that they could actually use that. It’s powerful. It’s fuel. Nothing means anything till we give meaning to it. You have to give things in your life a good meaning.

Your brain goes with you, and it carries all of the histories in the form of memories. Whatever happens before you is stored in the form of memories, and they are not accurate, they’re kinda compressed. You have no idea of the future, even though brain tries to predict it all the time. This is what dreams are for, this is what decisions are for. It simulates the future and makes predictions, you don’t know what’s going on. All you have is this reality and this is the present. The nice things about the present is it interacts with your brain and you can change things.

Memories change every time you used them. Everytime I asked you the same question, you open a different version, which means you can actually change your past, you can actually change your experience of things. 

This is why therapy works. After five meetings, you have a different version of a reality. And this is powerful, because we control the narrative that we have. We don’t really have to confound to the story that we’ve experienced, we can actually change it. 

That’s what the brain is for, to simulate, and change, and adjust and synthesize better version of life. 

We can make ourselves happy, we can make bad things look better, we can control things, and it’s all by virtue of just bending a story, looking it differently and saving it together. It’s as simple as that. We have the ability to actually change the story, all the time. So, learning is one way to do that, having more experiences allow us to do that. 

There are many many voices in our brain, and we are not the most important one, we’re not even in the centre. We’re just one more voice out of many in our head, and we’re the one who thinks the most important, but actually the quiet ones don’t really talk to us.

(Tom) The big breakthrough of my life is the day I stopped thinking myself as smart because I wasn’t, and I start thinking myself as a learner. That changes everything. Because now, the narrative that I was reinforcing, the memories I was pulling out changed just a little bit, and putting back, all revolve on reimagining myself as somebody who learns faster than other people, is willing to learn, and put in the time and the effort to learn, and became this identity, which was anti fragile, because now you can tell me I was stupid, it didn’t matter, it didn’t hurt, just compelled me to learn more.

I really am moved when you said I was wrong about that, that I should’ve done this, like anytime people can say that, can just own a mistake, and see a better solution, that’s somebody who’s polishing a self image, in a way that’s anti fragile. The more they look at their failures, the harder they go in a new and better direction. 

A standard job gives you the successful tool to become entrepreneur. It tells you you have to work on a certain time period, you have to be convinced to a certain task each day, and you have to complete those tasks. You carry those same principles to yourself as an entrepreneur.

I hate people who say “I’m done”. Don’t put a limit of what you can’t do, when you haven’t even try what you’re capable of doing.  

With technology and social media, social media is your private press conference. If they like it, they will let you know, if they don’t like it, they will let you know. 

When you wake up, it has to be about you.

You have to leave the hood, to be successful. You can not stay in the hood, to be successful. Learning how to relate to people that is not in the hood, learning that there’s a bigger scope of conversation that I have to gain.

If you see it on TV, create a realisation that you could be a part of that. If you do that, it changes the way you look at things.