Dianna

So, you are saying people not living in the third world are more entitled to happiness? I get the other reason, but now you make it look, in terms of happiness, that third world countries are inferior to other countries. Also, I think that materialism and the ‘possession’ of friends and family shouldn’t be at the core of happiness. 

As far as I know, there is no technology enabling mind-control in usage. Focus equals power, anonymous. What I think about, that I will become. I can either drown in circumstances, or I can float by changing my thoughts and perspective. 

Of course I would be sad and mourn for my killed family, but then again, did you know there are cultures that celebrate death (the Ari Muyang in Malaysia for example)? I was taught and raised to focus on the negative in such situations. I am not saying the hurt we feel is self-created, there is probably some biological response, but what I do say is that we have some control in how long we dwell on it and how much we feel sorry for ourselves.  

Another example, lets say you believe in heaven and your mom just died. From an egocentric perspective (not in a bad way) you could be sad; you just lost someone. However, you can also choose to be intensely happy, your mom is going to heaven. I know people who became Christian just because they could find some consolation in it after they had lost someone. This consolation adds to their well-being, making them less sad or more happy. 

Beliefs are what are at the core of happiness. The sun makes me happy. Rain makes me happy. I believe I don’t need much more. When I am walking home and the skies pour all over me, I can focus on the negative (wet clothes), but most of the time I start to walk slower and enjoy the experience.  

If you believe life is a damned, then it will be, no matter what. Beliefs are just like an Instagram filter; it puts focus on a pallet of colors. 

Have you seen or read The Great Gatsby? A marvelous story. In the final moments of the film, he was waiting at the pool for his lover to call him. She would call if she desired to be with Gatsby, instead of Tom Buchanan. Right after the phone rang, he got shot. But while he was falling down to meet his death, he was sort of happy because his girl called. However, it turned out that it was his best friend calling. Gatsby would never know, but in that moment, his belief made him happy. 

Anonymous:  Happiness is NOT a choice. As someone who’s been depressed for years, trust me- It is not a choice. Depression and mental illnesses involve the chemicals in your brain, which you can’t control. I am working for happiness, and that’s something I’m proud of. It’s not a switch I can turn on. If it was, I would have by now. But I have to work for happiness because I have to survive what my brain does against my will. That doesn’t make me weak either, it makes me strong.

Answer:  It is you that decided to work for happiness, right? If you can decide, you have choice. It is that easy. I am not saying one can flick a switch and be happy instantly. All I am saying is that you are empowered to make decisions. You can make the decision to be as happy as you can possibly be. You might be less happy than someone without depression, but still, you decided to work on it. Also, I never said it does make you weak and I will never say such a thing. In fact, I agree that it does display a lot of courage and willpower.

Anonymous: you sound like you have everything, of course you are happy. you sound like a spoiled person.

Answer: ok.

Anonymous: You can’t make generalizations based on your own experiences. Everyone is different and reacts to life and trauma and happiness differently. There’s nothing wrong with that, it’s part of what makes everyone unique. But only looking at your own experiences and expecting everyone else to live the same way is a bit closed minded.

If @electric–indigo​ says the disorder gets the better of him every now and then, then I believe him. You might want to follow this amazing person’s example because compared to him, there are so many people throwing in the towel so quickly saying ’I can’t choose happiness because I am depressed’. By no means I say you are weak, but you have to get up again some day and try again you know. 

Let me tell you something you already know:

you are not your depression. 

It is up to you how you interpret that sentence, I don’t really care if get a dozen more hate mails.

One more thing to the people making assumptions. That I didn’t say a single word about my experience with depression, doesn’t say I don’t have any experience with it. Do you want me to shove it in your face or what? Jeez.