sometimes when I teach my kids classes I tell them "today I'm mr evil" which means if I see them smile or laugh I'm going to beat them with a pool noodle. this simultaneously makes them behave much better and infinitely worse.
mr evil hates children and hates fun and hates sloppy martial arts. he's like if the grinch was a bond villain. my kids like him more than me.
the secret reason I do this is because sometimes I run out of energy to emote and I'm like hurrah an excuse to be monotone and blank faced























