little brother has been intermittently texting me the weather alerts for towns called Gaylord and saying "hey watch out"

good evening tumblr! for the low low price of $4.20 i will give you a fact that will ruin your night!

#for $6.66 i will give you one awful Premium fact that is directly related to the whale penis fact but is actually so much worse

#and for one final payment of $6.66 i will give you ONE LAST BUT BY FAR THE MOST HORRENDOUS FACT about blue whale penises#much worse than the fact that a penis museum exists and has multiple whale penises on display

THAT’S the part you focus on? Seriously?????

*slaps your ass platonically*

Someone needs to do this with an anime moan voice over

hi! don't do that

tumblr what the fuck did I JUST SAY

hmm it’s time to be unreasonably evil due to my tragic past

I am sending pain vibes your way. You will feel a lil discomfort on your leg

Ouch

Yeah

If you read this you owe me $5.

If you reblog this you only owe me $2

Reblog this post and say “Sasuke is my daddy :)” if you aren’t afraid…

sasuke is my daddy

Ok wait… Hold on

actually im a bug

forget your zodiac, tell me how the gävle goat was damaged in the year you were born

Burned halfway into December.

Dad this is your fifth one :(

Heheh.... pepsi time

They only have Wild Cherry, is that ok?