Health Bug

I lost weight in high school to get a boyfriend. 

I lost weight in college to be a thin bride. 

I lost weight after college for an attractive pregnancy.

Sometimes you need a bit of encouragement. I've been on a bit of a weight loss plateau for the past 6 months. I've been going through a lot with the passing of my dog from Lymphoma at only 6 years old in addition to a lot of issues going on financially. I am stressed and my husband doesn't like his job and when he doesn't like his job it turns into a career change and I'm trying to convince him to keep moving forward. Not to mention my own mental health with some issues going on within my family and friends.

I am trying to conceive and ended up being diagnosed with PCOS.

This diagnosis is honestly a puzzle piece that was missing. I had suspicion that I had PCOS but was on birth control so when I brought it up to a doctor they wouldn't really talk much about it because it was normal to not cycle on the birth control I was on. But anyway, finally diagnosed. I now know why it's so hard for me to lose weight and so hard for me to maintain weight - because I freaking love carbs.

I'm finally making peace with the diagnosis and working my way to lose 54 lbs so I am at a BMI of 44. When I am at the BMI I will then be able to begin taking ovulation medication prescribed by my Reproductive Endocrinologist.

I am 25.4 lbs down so far and it's been 5 months, almost exactly. I am kind of celebrating and I decided to take a milestone picture and I posted it here. One was taken in June 2023 and the other was today, November 20th, 2023.

I knew I was losing weight, obviously. I just didn't personally notice it much. Til this picture 🫣 I can't believe how much of a difference those 5 months made.

My ultimate goal is to get down to 160 lbs - or basically my weight to get me out of the "obese" category for bmis. We will see where life takes me, but the main goal right now is to conceive. So keep your fingers crossed for me everyone. ❤️

SW - 293.6

CW - 268.2

It just wasn't worth it to me anymore. My depression stemmed from a family problem and I felt alone and abandoned. Broken and betrayed. And I just didn't care to workout. To eat the good stuff. I wanted to be happy and just do the stuff that makes me happy.

But I am feeling a lot better now and rather than hating the weight I've gained I'm trying to embrace it and have a better outlook on it. I am also starting to talk to my family again, too, and we are setting aside our differences and moving forward. I'm still very cautious at this point and I don't think we will ever be where we were, but I think it'll be ok.

I feel good overall, but I am very worried about my health now and want to better my diet for that reason. I've been doing small things for the past month. I haven't weighed myself because to be honest my weight isn't a concern for me, for once in my life.

I'm turning to tumblr to ask - what do you suggest to do to start sustainable habits? I'm trying to start changing things that are easy...like changing my bread (to ezekiel), changing my drinks (to carbonated water), adding veggies to a meal that I typically wouldn't...etc.

I'm cutting my chocolate down significantly and I'm trying to think of meals to make that do not involve pasta. Just to keep carbs down, but not to restrict myself because I think that's where I've always gone wrong in the past.

I did buy an elliptical to get back in the exercise game (and my husband has a little home gym), but I've gained so much that I want to get my eating in order first. I am trying to walk more and eventually upgrade to the elliptical before work.

Please give me pointers. I've felt like I've past a point of no return. I've never lost more than 30 pounds before and I am scared. I want to just commit but I need to teach myself how to be healthy. I need help. Serious suggestions. Maybe youtube channel suggestions. Tumblr page suggestions.