and you’re not mine

october 21, 2024: josh says he feels "lost" on offense after a rough preseason. jalen blames himself:

I have to be a better leader and make sure he’s ready to go by game one. It's on me. I feel like Josh is a very unselfish person. There may be times he thinks, ‘I need to get somebody else involved.' But from my point of view, I just feel like we need to be better as teammates to make sure we’re all on the same page or we’re all giving each other confidence regardless.

october 25, 2024: asked again about the "lost" comments, jalen says, "[Josh] just talks to talk. The one person I really don't worry about at all."

also, jalen, josh, and mikal ordering ice cream in a nike x wu-tang commercial

october 28, 2024: doordash commercial feat. jalen and josh in which kurtis blow reprises his iconic song "basketball" for some reason. also lola brooke and sue bird are there

november 9, 2024: ROOMMATES POD: jalen and josh reflect on the one v. one they played last year in which jalen whooped josh. "it got dark," says josh reflectively

november 14, 2024: ROOMMATES POD: rick brunson guest stars and says josh "reminded me of myself". let's not think too hard about the implications of this re: jalen's psyche

november 26, 2024: everyone has a career night against denver. josh: "JB had 17 assists, which you'll probably never see again." jalen, when told this: "Yeah, Josh is funny. I would have had more if I didn't pass him the ball."

december 1, 2024: josh wears an enormous commanders hat in the locker room in order to make fun of jalen (eagles fan) from two directions. "the sizes, they said, small, medium, large... and then it said, 'jb'." jalen starts attacking him hat-first

december 4, 2024: jalen is asked about what winning the nba cup would mean and gives an answer about giving minimum salary guys and two-way deals to get $500k. josh is asked the same thing and says solemnly that he doesn't care about whether the young guys on the team get anything and just wants a new watch. jalen calls him an fucking asshole from offscreen

december 9, 2024: the knicks play the raptors, including gradey dick. josh tells reporter stefan bondy, "The second half, Jalen Brunson kept saying, 'I want Dick. I'll take Dick.'"

december 22, 2024: eagles play commanders. "We aren’t friends nor teammates today. We are just coworkers. I don’t like yall, yall don’t like me," says josh, tagging jalen and kat (also an eagles fan). kat replies with a middle finger emoji.

later in the day, josh tweets again, "Stop calling me @ jalenbrunson1." jalen replies, "What if it was an emergency?"

december 31, 2024: jalen tries to smack josh's ass on national tv. "you're lucky i turned to the lord," josh informs him

january 12, 2025: jalen scores 44 in a blowout against the bucks but this does not stop josh from doing a full pirouetting windup before smacking jalen's ass on national tv

january 15, 2025: jalen narrowly escapes getting his ass smacked on national tv again. the reporter, seeing this, immediately forces him to give josh a compliment

bonus very important angles of both jalen fending josh away from his ass with one hand and josh doing evasive maneuvers to stop jalen returning the favor

ROOMMATES POD: josh forgets jalen duren's name and jalen takes the opportunity to scam him out of a thousand dollars

january 19, 2025: kat fucks up his thumb and josh bangs up his shoulder. jalen reassures the media that they both "looked fantastic" in practice. "They're both great-looking men," he tells the new york post

january 23, 2025: jalen and kat both make the all-star team. josh on twitter: "If 11 and 32 aren't starters....We Riot." bullying works (they are named starters)

january 25, 2025: josh is attending the eagles-commanders nfc championship on sunday. jalen, on SNY, as josh audibly moans "leave me alone" offscreen: "Eagles fans, you know what to do. Harass Joshua Aaron Hart for me. Thank you."

january 26, 2025: eagles thump commanders. josh leaves early in despair and jalen, apparently closely monitoring his location, doxxes him. "Josh left before the 4qtr started," he tells twitter. Josh replies, "Have to get home so I can sleep. One of us has to play defense tomorrow"

january 31, 2025: ROOMMATES POD: "I'm Jalen Brunson, I'm an All-Star, I'm the King of New York, I'm the captain, oooooo, life's good... This guy, man."

february 3, 2025: josh smacks jalen's ass on national tv from a respectable distance

february 6, 2025: ROOMMATES POD, mike breen guest spot:

Can I say something?... Do you guys know, do you have any idea what you've done for the fans of this franchise over the last couple of years? Does it register how big a turnaround this has been for the fans? For years—and there have been a lot of dark years, before you guys arrived—I always kept thinking I wanted a team like this for the fans, because they're the most loyal fans that you can imagine. Even when the Knicks were terrible, there'd be a game in early April, they'd been out of playoff contention for two months, and if it's a one-point game with two minutes to go, the Garden sounds like it's Game 7 of the Finals. Even when the team was one of the worst in the league. And now for the fans to have this, on a nightly basis... It's incredible what you guys have done for these fans. I hope you recognize what that means to these people.

jalen's response: "I realize it, I see it, it's kind of hard to comprehend, because we're in the midst of it. We're not, like, 'It's over and you get to reflect on it.'" (wait 16 months, jalen.)

february 9, 2025: eagles win the super bowl. reporter: "did you congratulate jalen on—" josh: "NO."

february 13, 2025: ROOMMATES POD:

JALEN: If I were to ask for a trade, if they come to you and say, "Hey, Josh, what are your thoughts on the trade," where I get traded out of here, what would you say? JOSH: It would be one of those things—I know we would talk about it before anything happened. If you asked for a trade, you probably will, after that, say, "Just so you know, this is what it is." So I'm gonna be like, "Do whatever makes you happy"... but myself, I'm gonna be mad. JALEN: You would be hurt? JOSH: Yeah, I'm like— JALEN: Would you cry? JOSH: No, I ain't gonna cry. JALEN: You would cry. You might tear up. JOSH: I ain't gonna cry. I'm not crying. But I'm gonna be sick. Because I came here, you know, for you.

february 20, 2025: ROOMMATES POD: josh admits to enjoying bdsm.

march 17, 2025: jalen josh and mikal in at&t commercial... AND DONTE. they play "see you again". i cry

march 20, 2025: joint interview with complex magazine:

The two of you also co-host a podcast. Is there such a thing as spending too much time together? Josh: My wife says yes. Jalen: I'll say this, the amount of time me and Josh spend together–you would think we'd get annoyed at each other, but I don't think there's ever been a time where we've really gotten upset or mad or pissed off at each other. Maybe jokingly annoyed, but nothing ever too serious. So I'm going to say no. We haven't really had a problem.

april 13, 2025: jordyn brunson and hendrix hart hold hands on the basketball court and essentiallysports writes an article on jalen and josh's "special bond"

april 17, 2025: eli manning ropes jalen into doing a commercial where he tries being eli's roommate for 5 minutes and ends by begging josh to come be his roommate again

may 1, 2025: jalen sends ausar thompson skidding and narrowly wins the playoff series against the pistons. if you've seen it before, YOU'LL SEE IT AGAIN

josh on twitter: "JALEN BRUNSON 🗣️🗣️🗣️"

may 3, 2025: a'ja wilson releases first signature nike shoe. jalen and josh each get pairs and call her together at 7:19 am to yell about it

may 5, 2025: the knicks make a 20-point comeback to win over boston in game 1. jalen is asked how josh's energy impacts those comebacks. "that's just who josh is. he's gonna find a way to [realizing he is in serious danger of giving josh a compliment] run around... and do... things."

may 7, 2025: after a game 2 win a reporter brings up that they've been part of a national championship win and josh starts saying "don't do it" before jalen can even begin his sentence pointing out that he has two championships and josh has one

jalen silently shames josh for ordering uber eats

may 8, 2025: josh and jalen land at westchester airport and immediately go on a chicken shop date

may 14, 2025: game 5 against the celtics:

jalen elbows jaylen brown in the dick

josh cuts his head open and starts bleeding profusely

jaylen brown gropes josh's dick (possibly mistaking it for jalen's?) and they get into a fight

may 19, 2025: jalen is asked how josh's face injury motivated the team. "no one really cared. i think he deserved it"

may 22, 2025: we don't need to talk about it. they stop having an nba season for some reason. i've never heard of tyrese haliburton

may 25, 2025: josh comes off the bench for game 3 of the ecf (which he says he has a hand in deciding); jalen as well as others praise him: "that just shows who he is, as a person, as a player, as a teammate. doesn't care for anything individual."

june 17, 2025: after coach tom thibodeau is fired and rumors swirl that the knicks may make more major changes, including possibly trading josh, jalen tweets, "I am genuinely confused". knicks twitter flips. "Damn my bad yall, I was talking about love island" he clarifies

june 22, 2025: tyrese haliburton ruptures his achilles in game 7 of the nba finals due to the influence of devil magic in basketball. jalen and josh send prayers and well-wishes on twitter. (some fans think "ty" means "thank you" and not "tyrese", leading to consternation)

june 25, 2025: josh, jalen, and cam payne on vacation in greece

july 22, 2025: knicks media admin (in the start of an absolutely career year for her) forces jalen to call his teammates to wish them all a good night

tyler kolek asks jalen to come tuck him in

kat sighs, "good night, cap"

josh says "whatever, get off my phone" and hangs up on him

august 20, 2025: ROOMMATES POD: josh blithely denies having ever slapped jalen's ass. you know, like a liar

september 25, 2025: ROOMMATES POD live at villanova: coach wright suggests that if josh hadn't been dating shannon while he was at villanova, "who knows the kind of trouble he could have gotten into"

october 21, 2025: CANON EVENT III: jalen and josh doing a humorous content video for google of all people

jalen mocks josh for frequently needing to buy flowers for shannon because of "something dumb you did or said"

josh goes on a 4-minute rant about how australia is "the devil's playground"

josh says he likes his kids to be causing a little chaos. "this explains your entire philosophy of basketball," says jalen

josh says his most visited tab is google flights. "you know where i'm not gonna travel to, though? australia. that would never be in my google flights tab"

"what if i was in australia and i needed you to come help me?" says jalen instantly.

"what am i gonna do," says josh, wildly misunderstanding the vibe of when your femme asks you to do something stupid and labor-intensive for her

ALSO: josh becomes an underwear model for tommy john, which will get him mocked relentlessly unto this very day

JALEN: [observing the bulge at Josh's crotch in this photo] Hey, Matt. What's your favorite Thanksgiving food? MATT: Stuffing. JOSH: That's all me, baby.

october 24, 2025: josh's kids giving jalen a good luck hug before the game

november 3, 2025: josh wins new coach mike brown's Defensive Player of the Game gimmick (where the best defensive player of the game gets his photo taken with hard hat and timbs). spot the jalen brunson lurking in the background

mike brown has josh coming off the bench for the start of the season, which he admits is affecting him emotionally and mentally; after he drops 14 points and 9 rebounds in this game, jalen says, "I saw Josh Hart. The one we know and love."

november 15, 2025: josh's second dpog win! spot the even more secret jalen brunson

november 20, 2025: after two years of being made fun of on the podcast for stumbling over his words, josh takes the opportunity to make fun of jalen for stuttering on camera

november 28, 2025: josh ROBBED of $185k worth of watches!! jalen is very sympathetic

november 29, 2025: josh puts up 19 points and 15 rebounds in a game the night before. ny sports reporter mill tweets a screenshot of nba cup prize money, saying, "This is the performance of someone who got robbed and has to make sure they get their money back😂😂" josh quotes with, "You aint never lie Mill." jalen replies: "So you tweet but don’t acknowledge this when I sent it to you…?"

december 7, 2025: haze hart interrupts josh's interview to tell him "look at jalen, dad!"

december 8, 2025: josh finds out that jalen received 27 votes for mayor of new york city: "I'm actually a little surprised that it was only 27." asked if jalen would do a good job, he says, "Probably not. But it would be funny to see."

december 9, 2025: REPORTER: "You guys have found a groove since Josh joined the starting lineup. What's the key to that?"

JOSH: [extremely shirtlessly] 😏

JALEN: [pink] "He needs to shut up and let them keep leaving him open."

december 10, 2025:

"Josh Hart said you would be a terrible mayor. I would just like to know your take on Josh's assessment." "If I was mayor, whoever stole Josh's watches in New York City, I would make sure they walk free." (x)

december 13, 2025: CANON EVENT IV. let me just transcribe this in its entirety.

REPORTER: Josh, I want to ask you this because I think you would answer honestly. When you factor in his height, and—not the most athletic— JALEN: [hoarsely, getting over a cold] Jesus. REPORTER: You've said it! You've said it. JALEN: [sounding like a sad Victorian chimney sweep with black lung] You didn't have to say it, though. REPORTER: How many guys in the NBA do you think score the basketball better than he does? [Jalen lifts his eyes to the heaven as though pleading with God.] JOSH: Um—probably not many. You know, he's barely six-foot guard— JALEN: [to reporter, weakly] This is your fault. JOSH: —not physically impressive— JALEN: Ayo. JOSH: —not athletic. But he's able to manipulate, you know, defense. Obviously, big head, so he has a big brain. He's able to [suppressing a smile, badly] figure out those angles and find himself in positions to be successful. So [giggling] inch for inch, I think he's probably the best one.

december 15, 2025:

Unfortunately, me and Josh talk every day. Everyone thinks it's all jokes and laughter, but there's times we actually have serious talks. There's times he picks me up when I need it, and I do the same. The way he's able to control his mind when he's on the court, when he's working by himself, when no one's watching, getting his confidence back, doing all that—a lot of people don't see that. He's very nonchalant about who he is and what he does when it comes to the team, but he's an unbelievable worker, and he truly just wants to win. He's one of the biggest competitors I've ever met. He may not like to practice, but he will compete to the fullest level. My role is just to be there as a friend, obviously, when things aren't going great, but continue to push him, knowing: he is who he is, he's in this position for a reason, so go out there and do what you've gotta do. At some point, he got it. We're very happy for him, and we need him to continue to play at that level. (x)

december 17, 2025: CANON EVENT, unfortunately, V. december was busy.

the knicks won the nba finals and josh hart stuck his thumb up jalen brunson's ass on national television. there is really nothing else to say about this.

"Damn in 4k…..😂😂😂😂" says josh, about this. "IT WAS AI", he says about an hour later

december 21, 2025: alan hahn responds to jalen praising josh after a game with "thumbs up to that"

december 23, 2025: jaylen brown accuses josh and jalen of having done assplay before on livestream.

december 25, 2025: ROOMMATES POD: wives episode!

"you guys do stuff like [the thumb incident] all the time," says shannon.

"jalen, be honest. if you were not on camera, would you have had a different reaction? like, ooh!" says shannon.

"the intrusive thoughts won," says josh blissfully

january 10, 2026: ROOMMATES POD: jalen reveals that after christmas josh (who sprained his ankle in the xmas day game) delivered jalen's present to his house by sadly hopping up to his doorstep like an injured little frog

january 29, 2026: josh calls jalen beautiful twice while accusing him of lateness

josh also says people need to be more sensitive about jalen's trauma (having a thumb up his ass on national television (because of josh)). jalen tells him to shut the hell up

february 3, 2026: jalen's first (and only) dpog win of the year! josh, who rarely appears in dpog photos because he's busy icing his knees, supportively appears in photo

february 7, 2026: jalen tells josh on twitter "I hope you get curb stomped You ain’t shit @ joshhart" josh replies, "😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 you mad bruh?" jalen categorically refuses to explain this when asked

josh calls himself jalen's lowly squire

february 14, 2026: all-star weekend! jalen is asked who his most annoying teammate is, brings up the thumb incident unprompted, and refuses to refer to josh by name

february 17, 2026: vanity fair profile of jalen, where he takes a weirdly sexy photo with a basketball in a bed. on josh: "'You would think we'd get tired of each other,' Brunson says. 'Our wives will be like, 'You guys just saw each other.' And we're like, 'Yeah. And?''"

february 23, 2026: josh thinks the bulls are going to foul in the last fifteen seconds of a 105-99 loss and just fucking scampers in a big circle around the court like a cat at 3 in the morning. jalen loses it on the sidelines

march 3, 2026: josh gets dpog (for the first time in a while) and jalen appears in the photo to fuckin lay hands on hart's head like he's about to dub him a knight of the realm

march 5, 2026: ROOMMATES POD: jose episode! whole thing is worth watching in its entirety but particularly jose mocking jalen's excitement over josh getting traded to nyc ("AUUWH SHIT! AWWW... SHIT")

march 17, 2026: jalen sits out a game and josh puts up 33 points against indiana. "you know what hart is gonna do to brunson tonight, mike," clyde informs us. "you know he's gonna give it to his roommate after this proliferation. yeah, he's gonna get brunson good tonight."

alan hahn asks josh when he knew he was gonna have a good night. "when i knew jalen wasn't playing so he wasn't gonna hog the ball," josh says instantly

march 23, 2026: a reporter asks josh about making 9 three-pointers in a row and josh calls on jalen for backup

march 26, 2026: ROOMMATES POD: jalen and josh reveal that they got drunk and booked a week-long vacation alone together on a yacht

april 4, 2026: knicks admin asks the team who they would trust to take care of them if they were an egg and jalen thinks about josh so loudly that admin flashes "DON'T SAY JOSH" over him in the video

april 18, 2026: asked about his and jalen's growing friendship, kat says, "I'm not at the Josh level yet. But we work good." Jalen says, "Josh is not a friend."

april 25, 2026: jalen says josh is going to compete "night in and night out" and starts giggling at himself

may 6, 2026: new york times does a profile of josh and calls jalen his "comedic foil and longtime friend"

may 10, 2026: josh hits a three against philly and blows jalen a kiss

may 15, 2026: ROOMMATES POD: jalen getting incredibly horny about josh's basketball iq on camera

may 21, 2026: josh puts up 26 points against the cavaliers with the help of 6 assists from jalen. kat tries to do marriage counseling about this. jalen flatly denies that he was looking for josh or assisting him on purpose

may 26, 2026: after the knicks clinch a spot in the finals for the first time in 27 years, josh fails to get jalen's attention as he hugs his wife and gets jealous

jalen accepts ecf mvp trophy and demands josh stay out of his personal space to avoid another thumbcident

jalen gives josh shit for only having one championship ring at the post-game presser and then visibly panics when josh doesn't immediately laugh. josh says they share "a bond and a brotherhood for life"

a reporter eating chicken wings out of a bucket while josh stares directly into his eyes. jalen, no longer trying to hide his smile whatsoever: "don't say anything."

june 2, 2026: asked whether he would have repeated the thumbcident if jalen hadn't ordered him away, josh denies thinking about jalen's butt

june 3, 2026: full nytimes profile on nova knicks trio

game 1 of the nba finals; jalen fucks up his ankle and comes into pressers so high on painkillers that he compliments josh without qualifiers

june 4, 2026: josh is asked about the "everybody's better than jalen brunson until it's time to be better than jalen brunson" meme and says jalen is still underrated in the league and still proving people wrong

june 9, 2026: jalen calls kat one of his great friends. kat is told about this and his first response is "josh is gonna be jealous."

june 11, 2026: the knicks complete the greatest comeback in nba finals history. josh cites a moment where jalen, kat, and jose came to pick him up after a bad moment during the game as emblematic of the knicks' identity and their superpower during this playoff run

june 13, 2026: the new york knicks win the championship, ending an new york nba drought that began before the invention of hip-hop.

after shaking the spurs' coach's hand and being embraced by his father, josh grips jalen by the back of the neck and tells him "we did it". jalen later says this is just as important to him as the hug with his dad

josh is asked about winning a championship with mikal and jalen and says they have a bond that will never be broken and a friendship that will last for a lifetime

jalen receives the finals mvp trophy and hands it to josh's son

june 14, 2026: jalen and josh cuddling with the larry o'brien on the plane home to new york

as later revealed by both jalen and josh, josh texts jalen and mikal a speech so emotional he can't deliver it in person, saying how much he loves them and how glad he is to be doing this with them

june 15, 2026: the hosts of the today show press jalen and josh to admit they're best friends on tv while surrounded by pride flags (they refuse)

jalen also cites the moment during the comeback game when he, kat, and jose picked up josh as embodying the knicks' title run

june 18, 2026: shannon sticks her thumb up josh's ass at the championship parade

jalen and josh are invited to the yankees game to throw out the first pitch and jalen attacks josh for no discernible reason

june 22, 2026: ROOMMATES POD live from msg on espn, in which josh demands that various people (stephen a, becky hammond, etc) apologize to jalen for being wrong about how amazing he is

june 24, 2026: new york mag's profile of jalen is the week's cover story, with the headline "It's Good to Be King: Jalen Brunson takes it all in." "he does WHAT?" says josh on twitter. the more things change.

july 9, 2026: knicks admin has jalen do the "top 5 horror movies" meme and lists 1) "can you bring the trophy with you?", 2) josh hart, 3) picking the right headband, 4) "do you play basketball?" 5) mariska hargitay not attending a game