Rules, a Balloon, and a String
Hold the string so I can fly…. I don’t really dig the term alpha, I don’t think it is the best description of me; but, there is a universal understanding of alpha submissive here on Tumblr. I am SUCH a softie; but I navigate very challenging waters and I make the rules in my life. I come across as sweet confident, and I am. I’m also a bit of a little, am exceptionally playful, idealistic, trusting, joyful, compassionate, I feel deeply, am enthusiastic, and I get carried away with things sometimes. Or, maybe, things carry me away sometimes. I’m kind of like a balloon. Reality is, I’m better off if someone worthy is holding the string.
A friend here in Tumblrtown wrote a piece about just saying “No” which helped to prompt this Tuesday Truth. I read it and smiled – hell yeah, just say No! Here’s the thing…..I can give myself permission to do any damn thing I want (assuming I have the means); I can also practice strong self-restraint and/or push myself towards a goal and feel proud of myself. I can prepare myself for my future counterpart. I cannot, however, hold my own string.
Rules act as the string that keeps me from flying too high or getting tangled up in something that doesn’t serve my best interests. Rules do not minimize my competence; they free me to be fully present in the tasks that require my competence. A simple morning protocol and being accountable to it keeps me secured and gives Him purpose, which fuels my obedience..
Enter “No.” Being denied something might piss me off in the moment, but “No” is a means of keeping me from flying too high, or getting/being carried away by helping me feel the connection to my dominant. I don’t know about other submissives, but I feel incredibly sexy, feminine, empowered, and proud when I am obedient. “No” might be used in regards to wearing panties or to deny orgasm or cake, etc.; or it could be in reference to work - “No, you’ve done enough. Get a dish of ice-cream and get in the tub.” (Yes, I’ve been known eat ice-cream while I soak as a self-granted reward.)
Deferring many decisions (as simple as where to eat) is also freeing because it is just one less freaking thing I have to decide upon. He is welcome to guide clothing choices and oooh, if he says, ‘Wear a dress”, this girl swoons. The weight of decision-making lifted, I can fly high and enjoy myself knowing that He is has the string well in hand.
Perhaps this is the jist of it – self-regulation feels like another weight placed on my over burdened shoulders; being regulated/guided by a Dominant feels like a weight being lifted - which allows me to safely and joyfully soar….you know, like a balloon on a long string held by an amazing Dominant.
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