Hanie, live to be creative.

Thoughts of suicide are on my mind again. Tired of them. I don’t want to be stopped this time, I don’t want talked out of it. I just want to leave. but somethings holding me back. I know its the pain of hurting my friends, family and my lovely boyfriend, I cant leave this close to the holidays and my birthday. Im so emotionally tired. Im exhausted. Im so ready to move away and never look back, I just wish someone understood and could help me instead of just saying “It gets better” or “you’re always depressed cheer up” Its not that easy and when it gets better it just goes back to being terrible. Im numb and lost. Maybe one day I’ll have the guts to go through with it. 

Why am I honestly the worst at making friends? So if anyone out there wants to be friends let me know.... 

So I just got a job at McDonalds and I will be working 3rd shift and have never done that before. Any advice on the sleep adjustment and staying awake?

So me and my bestfriend are talking about getting our first apartment together. I'm looking for a new job and she works part time and is starting college next week. I am not going to school this year so could work full time. What is some advice you guys have on saving money and advice for looking at apartments. I am really excited about this but also super nervous because I've never had to have this much responcibility!

Old to me, new to you. But had fun at the beach with my babe 😘 💕

Just looking for a reason to live anymore

Off to work.

Really like this photo of me.