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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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@hadesisahero

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if i was a shapeshifter, half of my time would be spent making myself look androgynous and trimming up the things about my shape Iâm not happy with, and half of my time would be spent making my teeth look just a little bit sharper than is normal, changing my eye-color subtly between slightly unsettling shades, and giving myself an intricate âtattooâ that just barely moves every couple of hours, until itâs in a whole new shape next time you look at me.
Captain Marvel (2019)
Super Moist Chocolate Cupcakes
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A porcupineâs Halloween present (+ original sound effects)
I had no idea giant porcupines made fucking precious sounds
THATâS THE SOUND IT MAKES!?!?!?
UN-BE-FUCKING-LIEVABLEÂ
We got asked if this is cute and okay. I can very happily say yes, this is stupid cute and those are happy porcupine noises.Â
One of my favorite things about doing zoo work was all the noises you never realize the animals make when theyâre excited or interested in a new thing. Coatimundis squeak and snuffle, and giant porcupines make that sound.Â
Itâs been a long time since Iâve seen this video on my dash, so itâs time to bring it back! The information provided above is still correct, and was sourced directly from the zookeeper that takes care of this specific animal.
The amount of times I could have been that white girl in the horror movie could honestly be a movie in itself and itâs honestly a waste that my entire life isnât constantly recorded on film because it would be HILARIOUS
1. That one time I decided to see what was past the old gate in the woods, but when got there it had been smashed in half and there was a decapitated sheep head with no skin just off the trail, so instead I just turned around and went home.
2. That time some friends and I went camping and we found a pile of bones wrapped in a garbage bag buried under a log, but the adult supervisor told us it was nothing, so we just put it back and didnât talk about it again.
3. The time I was getting chased through the woods at night and I realized âwait itâs dark as fuckâ so I just held still until the guy gave up and left.
4. The time this dude said he was in love with me and so he was going to cut my head off and dump my body in a lake, so I told him to grow the hell up, but then he got caught stealing girlâs underwear a day later and I never saw him again
5. That one time in college where I was taking a shortcut on my home at night and a car followed me into a dark alley, so I stared directly into the driverâs side of the window and walked towards it to psych them out
6. The night I was out on a walk and this old guy told me heâd locked his keys in his truck and that he needed someone my size to crawl in through the back window for him, so I told him âyou know that sounds super suspicious rightâ and told him where to find a pay phone for a tow truck instead
7. The one time this random guy on the street said he was in love with me and so he was going to follow me home on my bus, so I clapped him on the shoulder and told him that if he got that close to my bus then I was going to throw him under the wheels, but then this really nice homeless man from Nigeria told the guy to fuck off and then checked to make sure he didnât follow me onboard
8. That big cat with yellow eyes who I found in a well and brought home who used to put rotting meat in my closet and wake me up by chewing on my face, until I put him back outside and never saw him again.
9. My one cousin who used to come over for the summer who kept calling me âpiĂąataâ and hitting me with sticks, until he went back home and was sent to juvie cause he finally got caught torturing animals
10. The time I got lost on the way to a meeting and wound up at a circus tent instead, and got followed by a full-out clown for three vacant street blocks
11. The pet hamster I had when I was seven who would scream all night and eventually escaped by ripping a bar out of its cage and wiggling through the hole. My mom caught it and put it back but it lived another year and a half until one night the screaming just stopped
12. The time I was whistling in the woods and something started whistling back, so I went home
13. That one night at summer camp where a group of girls got together to play âbloody maryâ in the lavatory and invited me to come with them so I said âno thanksâ and stayed with the camp councillors and drank soup instead.
14. The old abandoned house I just moved into with the door that leads into a big empty room full of dirt and empty cooking pots that I just sort of⌠locked up forever and never go near
15. Once when I was at an ihop I saw a coffee mug do a full 360Âş spin with nobody touching it, so I said âthat was neatâ and never ate there again
16. The time I took a photo of a big old raven sitting on the crucifix on top of the old town church cause it was the most goth thing Iâd ever seen, right? But then it swooped down towards me, so I apologized immediately for being rude, and I felt a little silly for a while but the car that hit me on the way home didnât even leave a bruise so idk be nice to birds
Sorry I know I bring this shit up a lot but sometimes im awake at night and I just. keep thinking
I think the secret to survival is to be good to animals, stay away from men, and say âno thanksâ to everything else
Lesson 1: donât talk to the children during nap time.Â
Filmer: âGo to sleep.â Kitten: âNoâ Filmer: âGo to sleep!â Kitten: âNo!â Filmer: âGO TO SLEEP.â Kitten: âNO!â
Oh my god
âtaehyungâs kitten mode: i become the butlerâ

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wow this is actually an excellent little horror piece
itâs just Subconscious Jenkins, the fun little gremlin who makes me want to eat leaves sometimes
Crispy Parmesan Potato Stacks
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Wait for the master.
make me choose â anonymous asked Waterbending or Earthbending
âł âWater is the element of change.â

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weâre almost in the â20s and dadaism is thriving, europeâs in a shambles, everyone is broke and the right wing is on the rise so i guess we really donât learn a goddamn thing huh
This is really the post I was looking for
Midterms are scary.