Huedhaut: why is Scorpio emitting blue fume?
Leon: he played a buzzfeed quiz named "which god of 'star crossed myth' are you"
Huedhaut: ...so, what'd he get?
Teorus: he got ichthys

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Huedhaut: why is Scorpio emitting blue fume?
Leon: he played a buzzfeed quiz named "which god of 'star crossed myth' are you"
Huedhaut: ...so, what'd he get?
Teorus: he got ichthys

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Huedhaut: why is Scorpio emitting blue fume?
Leon: he played a buzzfeed quiz named "which god of 'star crossed myth' are you"
Huedhaut: ...so, what'd he get?
Teorus: he got ichthys
[All gods in the living room]
Leon: friends? We're all friends now?
Zyglavis: worse, we're like family
Leon, trying not to cry of happiness: disgusting
Kidnapper, on the phone: if you can get me ten thousand dollars within the next 24 hours, you'll get your tall teleporting boyfriend back
Scorpio: [tied up] ten thou- you think I'm only worth that much? TEN THOUSAND?!
Kidnapper:
Scorpio, screaming: make that 10 BIL-
MC: stfu-
Teorus: I heard you're into bad boys
MC: yeah, so?
Teorus: Not trying to brag, but when the GPS said turn right, I turned left
MC:
MC: you got lost, didn't you?
Teorus: yeah

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[Preparing for MC's surprise birthday party]
Ichthys: Scorpy, move your long legs
Scorpio: no one asked to come sit next to me, pathetic fish
Teorus, whispering: guys, shut up! I hear her coming!
Leon: tch, what a waste of my time.
Dui: guys, she's opening the door!
Scorpio: oh, really? Couldn't hear that 'cuz your all so damn loud!
Huedhaut: everyone, you're gonna ruin this.
MC, crouched next to Huedhaut: who are we waiting for again?
Partheno: if it's one sin or 10 sins, you're still getting punished. so why not go for 100000 sins and go down a legend
MC, teaching Leon to drive: okay you're driving, Scorpio and Karno walk onto the road. Quick, what do you hit?
Leon: oh, the scorpion, obviously. I could never hurt Karno, you know.
MC: the brakes. You hit the brakes.
retrouve-moi dans le jardin à minuit
pairing: neuvillette x reader
a/n: this is my first fic in five years! it took me 10 days to write it and upload it on ao3, and i've found the confidence to put a post on tumblr as well. i'm still learning how to effiecently write characters, so if neuvillette seems out of character at any moment, i apologize. with that said, i hope you enjoy this :)
summary: you and the iudex formed an unlikely friendship outside the courtroom. but, a clandestine meeting with the iudex was not something on your bucket list. and of course, him calling you ma chérie does not help.
warnings: none, except cavity-inducing fluff and soft!neuvii to bold! neuvi (does making-out count as a warning?)
word count: 2.2k
song rec: bloom by aqyila
read the fic on ao3
Teorus: [pushing a door that clearly says pull]
Huedhaut, standing behind: push harder

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Zyglavis: I want to hear those three important words
Ichthys: I love you
Zyglavis: try again
Ichthys: I will behave
Tauxolouve: Here, Karno. A warm cup of coffee with a dash of sriracha for you.
Karno: thanks Lou, that's really sweet of you!
[At a distance]
Teorus: Leon, you okay?
Leon: no one plans a murder out loud, do they?
Teorus: you shouldn't use a straw...
Ichthys: I know, it's harmful for the environment
Teorus: no, it's just-
Teorus: people eat lasagna with a fork
[Ichthys as a father]
Random guy in the park: if you're happy and know it, clap your hands
Ichthys, smiling: [claps]
Ichthys:
Ichthys: SHIT I WAS HOLDING THE BABY-
MC: you remind me of the ocean
Scorpio: because i'm deep and mysterious?
MC: nope because you're salty and scare the shit out of people

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Teorus: how do you politely tell someone you wanna hit them with a brick?
Huedhaut: one wishes to acquaint your facial features with a fundamental item used in building walls. Repeatedly.
Teorus: fantastic
MC, thinking: Scorpio is so intimidating... I wonder what he is thinking
Scorpio, arms folded in deep thought: rabbit apples