HIATUS / gunrising ;

“ it's nothing. ” yoshi said , swatting away her hand and averting his gaze. her sweet little cousin had never looked more like a sullen , brooding teenager than he did in that moment. “ kiyoshi , tell me who did that to you. ” her tone was firm , bordering on demanding. it wasn't a request and he knew that so he shrugged his shoulders in defeat. “ he called you a traitor - ” kiyoshi muttered and he almost could have sworn he saw a flash in the assassin's eyes as soon as he let slip. “ if you say ichiro i swear to god. ” kana warned but kiyoshi fell silent. he wasn't upset that his older brother had struck him , he was more wary of what kana might do in retaliation. her anger didn't manifest often but when it did , it wasn't something to take lightly.

crouching down in front of the boy , kana softly rested her hands on his knees. despite this gentle action , her tone remained stern like a mother disciplining their child. “ yoshi you don't need to defend my honor. ” she began , abruptly. “ i can handle myself and they're going to talk regardless and when they do , you don't say a damn thing. not to your brother , or our cousins , your father or the rest of the family. you keep your mouth shut. it's not worth making your life harder or making the family think you can't be trusted. focus on yourself , do not worry about me. are we clear ? ” had he been younger , he would have been more obedient but adolescence was really coming in full force. “ kana it's not fair , you almost d- ” but she was quick to cut him off. “ i know. i know. but it's out of my hands. ”

kiyoshi looked like he was going to fight her on it again , before his eyes diverted to oncoming company. “ couldn't stay away , huh ? ” ichiro piped up from the doorway , leaning upon the frame with his arms folded over his chest. the older cousin was meant to be away on business - that's why kana had organised to drop rei over to the home when she did. “ ugh , who snitched ? ” the younger boy groaned , rolling his eyes and slumping back into the sofa. “ you know i have eyes and ears everywhere , little brother. ” ichiro almost appeared amused by the whole thing. that they had attempted to go behind his back and failed. kana was quick to interject. “ yoshi , take rei and go to your room. ” knowing what might transpire , the teen was suddenly more agreeable and was quick to exit with the dog.

kana stood up straight as ichiro approached. he was much bigger than her , but that had never intimidated her. “ i was hoping for a bit of a warmer welcome but i guess you're still upset. ” the man smiled down at her. she really hated seeing such a smug look on his face. since when had he become such a villain ? he had been spending way too much time with her father , that was for sure. “ you are such a fucking disappointment. ” she shot back at his comment. “ you're going around hitting kids now , your own brother ? ” she continued. “ when did you stoop so low ? ” ichiro scoffed harshly at her words. “ he's fourteen , hardly a kid and he needs to learn how to stay in line. ”

in that moment , the assassin couldn't believe the words that were leaving ichiro's lips. he had always been reasonable. they were much the same in a lot of ways and that's why they were always so close and that's why it hurt so much more when she found out he was one of the people who betrayed her. “ did you forget the fact that we - ” she gestured between the pair of them. “ practically raised that boy after your mother died ? ” ichiro winced at the reminder. he wasn't a complete monster like her gaze and her jagged words suggested. he was just doing the best he could in the circumstances he was in , or so he believed.

“ you think this family is going to let any sort of rebellion slide after you ? acting like you can fuck around and do whatever you want ? what kind of message do you think that sends to the rest of them ? they're impressionable. ” it took everything in kana's being not to slap him square across the face , so , she shoved him instead.“ you didn't hit him because you were teaching him a life lesson ichiro , you hit him because you were angry at me and you can't fucking control yourself ! ” ichiro took a few steps back as her hand connected with his chest. “ oh , boo-fucking-hoo , kana - our father did worse to us when we much younger. you wouldn't know because you've been so fucking spoiled your whole life. ”

the S word always took her aback. i suppose normal people might not see her as such , due to the dark nature of how she lived and how she was raised. however , compared to others in her position , she did believe she was spoiled in a lot of ways. her father never had to beat her into line. but ichiro's father , he called it facing their fears , learning to take a hit. the concept was that they would get used to the pain and learn not to fear it during combat. it was barbaric of course , but they couldn't deny that it worked - however , ichiro was smart enough to know it wasn't a necessary cycle to repeat. although , maybe in his mind it was. maybe he thought if kana's father had treated her the same she wouldn't have strayed away from them.

“ i swear to god if you ever touch that boy again i will gut you like a fucking fish and leave pieces of your severed limbs on each one of our relatives doorsteps. ” ichiro's eyes widened as quickly as his brows furrowed. “ christ , kana. ” he was disturbed by her words and unfortunately , given the severed head that she brought to her father as a ' gift ' recently , he was inclined to believe her threats. it made him resentful. how dare she show more care and consideration toward kiyoshi , after everything ichiro had done for her. “ i did what i had to do after you abandoned us ! ” the heir snapped , raising his voice.

in that moment , kana was feeling a whole range of emotions. to say she was triggered was an understatement. “ abandonned ? is everyone just forgetting that you all almost fucking killed me ? it was the consequences of this family's actions ! ” she shouted , throwing her hands up in the air. “ you people make me so fucking crazy ! ” each time she had to shout and scream to be understood it felt like they were driving her clinically insane. why didn't they care ? why did they act like it was no big deal ? she was out of her mind. like they wanted to turn her into some hysterical woman. “ you'd rather die than be useless anyway , i know you would. ” ichiro replied through his teeth.

the worst thing about his words is that he was right. she couldn't stand not contibuting to a cause in some way shape or form. but did the end really justify the means ? “ so , what ? that makes it okay to , oh , i don't know , kill me ? ” kana shot back. “ that's not what i said. ” her cousin grumbled in response. “ oh ? well by all means , clear up my misunderstandings , ichiro. ” the assassin folded her arms over her chest , eyes staring daggers at the man , a single digit tapping against her arm as she waited for his excuses.

“ i did it for you ! ” ichiro yelled , completely and utterly exasperated. it caused him to take a step back and run his hand down his face. “ what the hell are you talking about ? ” his claim brought her pause , she was confused. “ who do you think planted the idea in your father's head ? even before your engagement , before we picked him. ” her eye almost twitched at the confession. “ excuse me ? ” the assassin's tone was fueled with anger yet she needed to know more. ichiro shrugged. “ i fed him the idea - picking someone who we could absorb power from , after his death because it would lead to your freedom and us coming out on top again. it was the only way for things to go back to being the same. ”

kana was speechless. she couldn't even comprehend how she was meant to respond to that. ichiro had been the catalyst , he was the one pulling the strings. god , he was a lot more like her father than she originally thought. “ ryoto got to absorb more members into the syndicate and he got his best soldier back. it was a win-win. ” ichiro continued. “ plus , now no one will touch you. no yakuza heir in their right mind is going to put his name down to marry a widowed assassin - it's bad juju. you're done , you're out. you don't have to just be somebody's wife anymore. ” the anger in her expression was fleeting for her demeanour had shifted to something more sad … disappointed. “ and if it didn't look like you had to fight your way out you would have been a suspect in his death … it never would have worked. ” he concluded with a sigh.

“ ichiro , i did not ask you to do that for me. ” the revelation made her feel so melancholic. it all just felt so wasteful - but maybe that was just her self worth talking. “ katashi did not deserve to die and that wasn't your choice to make - ” she added firmly. “ he was my - ” she paused. " he was my husband. i might not have been the one to pick him but he was still mine. ” if she had any idea that things would turn out this way she would have made them choose someone who deserved to die. it wasn't fair. ichiro didn't say a word. he knew she was right but on the other hand , there wasn't anyway he was going to allow her to marry a monster who would make her life hell , even if only temporary until the job was done. he was trying to protect her , protect their family , didn't she see that ?

“ let's not forget that i'm the reason you have everything. ” kana added adamantly. “ and don't give me that you're a girl crap because if i wanted your position , i could have fought tooth and nail for it and won. ” she spat. suddenly she felt inclined to remind ichiro of his place. yes , her cousin was going to succeed her father once he stepped down , and yes , the reason that responsibility skipped kana was because she was female. although had she wanted it badly enough , she could have fought harder. she could have proved herself and ichiro knew that , surely he did. “ you only get to sit on your high horse as our family's heir because i allowed it. ” that comment triggered ichiro to snap at her again. “ you know nothing of our family hierarchy ! ” the reaction stunned kana. causing her to furrow her brows suspiciously. “ i know nothing ? - ” she said slowly. “ what do you mean by that ichiro ? ” truly , she was curious.

she could see the anger building in his eyes again , threatening to spill over. “ i was the reason you got to come back home and you still decided to fuck off and go live with your new little play thing instead - you left me alone in a sea of sharks - who else could i rely on to have my back ! ” he was hurt … she could see it clearly now. it caused her expression to soften , but only slightly. “ left you alone ? ichiro , i still saw you every week. i became a trophy wife , i didn't fall off the face of the planet ? and even now , you guys drove me away , why the hell would i want to come back here after that ? ”

ichiro shook his head. “ we used to be a team. " kana could help but sigh. “ ichiro we're adults , things happens , that's life - you're a man so you get to pick what you do , i don't. or at least i didn't so after all you and my father put me through , excuse me for wanting to go do something selfish for a change. ” was it really that big of a crime for her to be selfish ? it was. that was exactly how the yakuza worked. even those born outside of the family were still expected to cut off their own biological families and friends in order to pledge their sole loyalty to the group. kana and ichiro were fortunate enough to have their family be the very group itself , so it was an even bigger betrayal on her part to step away.

“ that's why i picked for you ! ” ichiro's tone came off a little desperate , as did the look in his eyes. he was trying to get her to understand. he was never trying to hurt her , he was just trying to make things easier. “ i don't need you making choices for me behind my back , it doesn't make you any better than my father. ” her words made him wince again , each time like a gunshot. ichiro turned his back to her and dropped his head as he sighed once more. “ you don't get it. ” it wasn't for lack of trying. kana wanted to get it. desperately so. she wanted to understand why in his mind he thought this entire ordeal would bring her comfort.

kana took a step toward her cousin who still had his back to her. her hand reached for his shoulder so she could turn him back toward her , force him to look at her. “ then explain it to me. ” she was giving him a chance , but ichiro still shook his head prompting the assassin to repeated the words , although this time more firmly. “ explain it to me. ” the man instead , averted his gaze causing kana's frustration levels to rise again. yet she did her best to keep her cool , fighting the urge to shout at him again. “ if you want to fix this , you need to tell me the truth because i do not have the capacity to handle any more secrets right now. ”

ichiro's eyes met hers before he ran his fingers back through his hair and looked away again. she could tell whatever he was holding onto was causing him a great deal of stress. and honestly as this point , the was silence was deafening. kana simply waited him out and after a long pause , ichiro exhaled and stepped away to take a seat on the sofa , resting his elbows on his knees with his hands clasped together. “ look , when my mother died i got a number of things in her will , right ? ” kana nodded as she recalled the time. her gaze had followed him to the sofa although she remained standing as he spoke. “including a letter that she had written for me shortly after i was born. it was only to be handed to me by her lawyer in the event she ever passed … ”

kana continued to nod as he allowed to words to spill out particularly slowly. “ … okay … ” kana hadn't any idea where this was meant to tie in with today's events but she wanted the insight , so she remained patient. “ it contained highly sensitive information so i burnt it straight after i read it. ” he explained , causing kana to pose the question. “ what did the letter say , ichiro ? ” her cousin took a deep breath , indicating that the information he was about to share with her came as a burden. “ she wanted to ensure that i would get ahead in the family … and it said that she'd had an affair at the time i was conceived … ”

kana's eyes widened and her hand clasped over her mouth for a moment before uttering. “ you're not an izumi ? ” her brain immediately jumped to the only clear conclusion that seemed plausible in that moment. he was a false heir. he had no claim to a single thing he had been given or worked for. it was all a lie. however ichiro was quick to halt that train of thought. “ no , ” he snapped - a little too quickly before he took a breath and calmed his tone. “ that's not it. ” it wasn't ? so , kana paused and really thought about it. her mind went back , searching through the rollerdex of phrases he'd said to her over the last 10 minutes. then it hit her : his mother wanted him to get ahead , she had an affair , but he was still an izumi.

they shared the same father.

kana gasped “ that means … ” processing the information as best she could digest. it did make sense though , didn't it ? when she really thought about it. they were already so alike - kana's own mother would joke that they were twins in another life. plus ichiro was ' kindly ' put forth as the izumi clan's heir instead of kana , ryoto's real first born , but of course that was just because she was a daughter , not a son , right ? if ichiro was ryoto's son , there was no power lost. his legacy would still get to live on even if only in secret. his ambition truly knew no bounds. though no one would dare to alter the balance by admitting such a betrayal out loud. the whole structure of the syndicate would implode on itself in seconds should ryoto and his twin brother jiro have such a falling out. and to think , ichiro had been holding onto that information on his own for 13 years.

ichiro finally looked at her and nodded “ yes , it means - ” but kana's reflexes were quick to kick in. “ no , don't say it out loud. ” she interrupted , holding her hand up causing ichiro to fall silent again. “ … ” kana too was silent for a time. they shouldn't ever utter such words aloud , not at the risk of making it real. there were trained to act as if people were listening at every turn. to believe nowhere was truly safe. so it was better not to say things that didn't need saying. at least not until they were out of range. her brain began to run through all the scenarios that could occur should this information ever find its way outside of them. but suddenly she remembered her cousin in front of her and the toll it must have taken on him.

kana took a few steps toward the man , a hand reached out to rest on his head as she looked down at him upon the sofa. “ it must have been hard for you , holding onto that for so long … ” she murmured , patting his head softly a few times as if she were comforting a child. ichiro closed his eyes with a sigh , feeling a little less heavy now that kana knew. “ it's shaved years off of my life. ” he mumbled. but he truly did feel less anxious about it all now , it wasn't just his burden to bare anymore. and now that it appeared kana was taking pity on him - he could attain that level of support he originally sort from her as his sister.

“ mm. ” kana hummed , before she moved to take a seat beside him. “ this could ruin everything … ” she added bluntly , as her mind continued to race. it wasn't a topic to take lightly and as angry as she was at her father , it was harder to stay angry when she had realised ichiro had played the lead in that and why he had done it. she wasn't spiteful enough to ruin her entire family's empire over one dead husband and her near death experience. there was just too much on the line she wasn't willing to risk. and god knew her father would never utter those words aloud himself , knowing the chaos it would cause.

“ does anyone else know ? ” kana pryed , she already knew the answer but in situations like this it was best to be thorough. “ no , and it needs to stay that way … you need to promise me you're not going to say a word to anyone - especially not your father , it's too dangerous. if he knows we know , he'll kill us both. he can't have us holding that kind of knowledge over his head. ” kana agreed , she already knew the implications. “ jiro would kill you too out of spite. ” she added , thinking of ichiro's ' father '. they both understood how this would go. no mentions of this conversation over text , calls or emails. no digital trails. no nothing unless phones were off and they were out of range. no one else could be trusted but the other.

turning to the man , kana gave a small shrug. “ look , ichiro you've already made me into a traitor to the family , so there's not much i can do for you. ” the assassin spoke honestly. had she known earlier maybe things would have been different. “ no , kana … i'll fix this. ” he reassured her , stubbornly. " get a grip , ichiro. ” kana quipped back , shaking her head. “ my opinion matters - it's one of the only few that does. ” ichiro affirmed , causing kana to quirk a dark brow. “ so ? ” she questioned. “ i took something from you , so i will atone for it accordingly and naturally , in turn everyone will follow suit … ” the heir began to explain. “ i can get ryoto to stand behind me on this , if he thinks it's going to benefit him - getting his favourite killer back and the family back together in a way he thinks he can control … you're still as asset to him kana. ”

of course she knew that. it's not like he had another genetically enhanced guard dog tucked away somewhere since she was his only success. “ what would you do ? ” kana asked. “ yubitsume. ” ichiro replied , simply. almost as if the term meant nothing. he would shoulder the blame. argue that he should have taken better care of her and ensured her safety to prevent the fall out. he would claim had he acted smarter and anticipated the outcome better , kana wouldn't have felt the need to leave their family. it was his mistake for underestimating kana's ability to handle the truth - and he would take that mistake on as his own alone , apologising directly not to kana but to ryoto for his failings that caused disruption to the family.

kana shook her head. “ you'd be admitting fault - ” that wasn't to say that she believed him undeserving of the punishment , but yubitsume meant he would be wearing a very physical reminder that he had enacted a level of betrayal that required such an extreme apology. “ there's nobility in holding yourself accountable for your own mistakes. ” ichiro added , ernestly. he wasn't wrong. the yakuza operated on an honor code and ichiro had a very special way of making those around him trust in him and that was partially due to his reputation of being a man of the people. “ plus , no one but your father would dare to comment on it. ” he continued.

kana gave a soft scoff. “ kenji might. ” her mention of their other , more troubling cousin caused ichiro to roll his eyes. “ i can handle that brat. ” dealing with kenji was nothing but a chore for ichiro these days. he wasn't exactly as well received as the rest of the younger generation and for good reason. pushing that thought to the back of his mind , ichiro turned to kana , taking one of her hands in both of his. “ but it has to go both ways. after this , you return to your position in the family. to a degree , i will ignore what you do in your personal life as long as you come when i call. ” the look in his eye seemed desperate - or so kana thought. “ you look after me and i'll look after you. ” he concluded his plea.

the assassin blinked at him for a moment before her expression relaxed. she could see that ichiro , even as a grown man , was clinging to her. but his mother was dead and his father wasn't really his father after all , so perhaps she should cut him some slack. it's not like he could confide in kiyoshi - it was too big of a burden on 14 year old. even an adult could become unsteady after their world had been ripped out from under them and to sit on that information for so long alone … kana could tell it had been eating him alive. it was as if she was experiencing a whole new wave of responsibility - that of the sibling variety. of course he kind of was her responsibility now , there was no question. kana wasn't just a kindred spirit anymore , nor his cousin , she was his sister.

admittedly she missed her family and she missed the way things were. she craved nothing more than to come home and have dinner with her parents again , to have her mother hug her and tell her everything was okay. she wanted things to be normal because she felt empty without them. god knew after everything , that was a defect. but kana knew what they did to her would never happen again given this new revelation. surely there was no way ichiro would ever fuck her over knowing what she knew now. he leaned on her too much. he needed her support , her allyship. that much was clear.