how do i tell my nervous system that im not being hunted for sport
How do I tell your nervous system that I'm hunting you for sport?

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how do i tell my nervous system that im not being hunted for sport
How do I tell your nervous system that I'm hunting you for sport?

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they got married btw
oh you’re not kidding
I love you disabled girls. I love you scared girls. I love you dysfunctional girls. I love you sad girls. I love you hurt girls. I love you trans girls. I love you racialised girls. I love you lonely girls. I hope you find people who love you and care for you like you deserve. I hope you find people who will hold you and let you hold them. I love you.
there is a stripper pole in my attic. i saw it in a dumpster one day, and i went, shit, this is exactly the kind of thing my wife would want. and i didnt really want it in the house, what with it being a used stripper pole lightly seasoned with dumpster juice, but i mentally decided that if she were to see it and ask for it, i would say she could have it, and then sure enough, later that evening, she went soooo baaaaaaaabs there's this thing by the dumpster and i want it but i get it if you don't want it in the house but i have to show it to you- and i went, no you dont, you can have the pole, and that was the most surprised i have ever made her look. even compared to the day when i proposed to her, which she was prepared enough that we both knew she would say yes, and she could also get her hair done up and have a cute outfit, but not so prepared that she was not fucking flabbergasted by the 12 empty decoy ringboxes i sprung on her. i handed her so many decoy ring boxes that day. still one of the funniest things i've ever done to her.
anyway we like pacing around together and ranting in the attic but sometimes instead of pacing one of us will just hang on the pole and spin, and the other person will watch on the beanbag, which makes for these really goofy conversations where the person on the bag will say something that gets the other persons goat, such as, hypothetically, that xylophones do not belong in rock music, and then the other person will go on a tirade about this, but they'll actually only be facing the Hot Take Speaker half of the time, what because of the pole, so the response will sound something like
I can't believe
you would even suggest such
a stupid opinion. You've
been to a Danny Elfman
concert! How can you
have heard Oingo Boingo
live and say with a straight face
that they alone do not justify
rock and roll xylophones
and then that person will continue until they get too dizzy, then they'll get off the pole, and by unspoken agreement, the person on the bag will get up and trade places with them to deliver their rebuttal while also spinning and it just creates this sort of crazy strip-court lawyers debating absolute nonsense for no reason kind of vibe that frankly just really does it for us.
i don't really have any marriage advice for this i guess its just a look at what being married can look like. i thought that being married would involve a lot more stuff like carving the turkey, or barbecuing, or watching the sunset, and if id known how much time it would involve arguing for xylphones in rock music while spinning upside down i might have prepared for it a little differently.
Reblog to cast heal on prev

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making other people cum is lowkey a little more fun to me than cumming
We love titty submissions
reblog to give prev a gentle, sweet kiss on the forehead

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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This blog is pro tits and anti Nazi
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tumblr irl meetup but we won't say who is who, instead you get a list of all the blog urls that are attending and you have to try to match each person with their blog. You can ask questions but you can't ask for the blog name directly.
it's like crime dinner but instead you gather clues by observing who laughs at which dick joke.
my emotional support heavy metal

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Reblog to give prev's boobs a squeeze