illegal lava lamps

A catagory 6 cunt quake in computer city has left my haters dead & shit

so much of life is needing to pee. enough already

Kids will chase each other and make the kinda sounds you'd make if you were being gutted and skinned alive for fun

so much hatred and killing and violence in ghe world. but not in my house. i kiss each piece of pasta before droppng them into the boiling water

im like one of the grandparents who doesn’t get up in charlie and the chocolate factory

I love how muppets walk I wish I could walk like that

i think there should be two nighttimes. one for sleeping and a second one for being awake but at night. and then only one daytime because daytime doesn’t matter as much except for the birds

why is everything so mortifying like i'll order pizza in a pizzeria and i'll be like. who the fuck does that this is so embarrassing