don't worry about it

adult life is truly just thinking “I NEED TO CLEAN” while dealing with the 17 other things that have a hard deadline

this lettuce smells like dog

you bought dog lettuce

listen i consider myself an empathic person but after a certain point i get sick of other people’s problems. my friend is always talking about how the jewel-eyed skull on their mantlepiece is tormenting them w its sinister beauty and im over it. like dude i don’t want to talk about this anymore. get rid of the fucking skull

you’ are biased against my skull

i’m not having this argument again man

love books. because it’s like what if something happened

my dedication to asceticism means that every time i get horny or even pop a half chub by accident i have too tie a blind fold over my eyes and try to light and smoke one full pall mall before Laura Palmers theme finishes playing over the loud speaker and i dont make it all the way too the filter without coughing all the other monks come in and beat me with socks stuffed with beautiful handmade soap bars that our monastery has produced for 1200 years

the human brain is so cool, if you're tired and stressed enough, your brain will go, "don't worry, I got you" and shadows will start moving

and what's the genital situation on the shadows

oh this is my post

boss makes a spider i make a slime. that's why i . thas why, tthats why i uhhh. t. thawhy

t.gats why i can't think up an end to the rhyme

GET BACK TO WORK

idc about fluoride in the water supply im petitioning my congressman to add a drop of that mysterious green fluid that emits a ghostly green skull when you put it in

just one☝️drop a week could turn everyone sickly

boss, is this stuff supposed to make pink smoke hearts?

wuhoh