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Louis: ‘Cutting off Nicki’s hands? Savage babe.’

Daniel: ‘He’s calling you a liar Louis, you gonna take that?’

Armand: ‘Ugh he’s singing again, Louis pass me my noise subduing ear devices.’

Daniel: ‘Lestat sure does like his beauty sleep.’

Louis: ‘I reserve my right to slap Marius in the face, just letting everyone know that now.’

Daniel: ‘I’ll hold him down while you punch.’

Armand: ‘Do you two really think an ancient vampire would entertain your petty aggressions?’

Daniel: ‘I could take him.’

Louis: ‘I’m looking to diversify my portfolio of vampire violence.’

Daniel: ‘That’s what we have in common, Louis, always hungry for the next challenge.’

Armand: ‘Or more accurately, you both have the survival instincts of a Pomeranian.’

Louis: ‘I’m going do it, Arun. Survival notwithstanding.’

Armand: ‘Yes Maitre’

Daniel: ‘You do realise that Marius walked so you could run with that Maître bullshit.’

Louis: ‘A healthy reframing of a toxic dynamic.’

Daniel: ‘A true capitalist, profiting off your enemies blunders.’

Armand: ‘ENOUGH!!!’

Daniel telepathically: ‘Is it just me or is it really hot when he freezes us?’

So my questions is… how the fuck was Armand directing this trial while he was living with Louis? Armand says the coven showed him the new script the night Madeline was turned so assuming he was telling the truth (this is one of those things that the writers should have provided clarity on unlike the steins) then he would have been living with Louis during rehearsals.

I had assumed (maybe giving the writers too much credit here) that Armand moved in with Louis so Louis wouldn’t turn up at the theatre to see him around the time Lestat was there rehearsing with the coven. I mean the coven asking Armand to keep Louis distracted so they could get stage ready without him getting suspicious would make perfect sense.

The only time rehearsing the play is mentioned is in episode 8 post trial when Armand tells Louis that he stayed in his coffin the whole time. What’s more confusing is that at the end of episode 6 Claudia asks Armand how he’s enjoying her coffin so it’s implied he’s been living with Louis. But then in episode 8 Louis says ‘and when you spent nights over here you didn’t think in all that time telling me.’ So did Armand have his own place (pretending to be there the nights he was at rehearsals) and only spent some of his nights with Louis?

So we still would have gotten a Loumand torture scene and Lestat decapitated for the long table nonsense, but in way that had you rooting for the perpetrator. Like yes Claudia take your revenge, you deserve it girl.

Genuinely that was hard to get through.

The devotion these writers have to misunderstanding and insulting their poc characters and their obsession with shock value at the expense of good writing is beyond comprehension.

My biggest issue is the Loumand apology. Because it was so close to being actually good. But I guess it was too much to expect these writers to give us a heartfelt scene between two poc characters this season. They could have written a truly beautiful scene where Louis and Armand admit to each other how they failed one another in their relationship and the consequences it led to. But that moment was tainted by the way Armand has to torture and coerce someone in order for them to acknowledge his abuse and engage with it sympathetically. And Louis apologises to yet another one of his abusers whilst being physically mutilated.

Turning Armand into a comic book villain who took sadistic pleasure in directing a play to kill Louis/Claudia/Madeline, who psychologically haunts Louis with Fraudia, and brutally tortures Louis… ? They threw everything they could think of to paint Armand as a villain in the purest form, even the Steins in Louis’ portfolio just to fuck with his head. And all the while they cleanse Lestat of all his wrongdoing.

Lestat: insults Armand about his traumatic childhood - band member commits suicide

Week 2: house/haunting

@loumandmicrofic

Jagged steeples pointed at the pale half moon as stained-glass windows, with their array of vibrant colours, reflected the cold streetlight. Beneath this house of God was the scorched foundation of the forgotten palazzo of Marius de Romanus. The irony of it could have afflicted Armand with a fit of psychotic laughter if the unchanged pavement surrounding him hadn't stung him first with a razor sharp memory. Worn by the relentless passage of time, the letters R and A were faintly engraved into the enduring stone on which he stood.

‘Were you going to attend evening mass without me?’ A voice teased.

This melodic voice and the familiar smell of clove and jasmine pinched Armand with awareness. There was no black-haired boy squeezing his hand as they both clasped a single iron chisel, boring their initials furiously into a stolen time.

‘I didn’t expect to find a church here.’ Armand confessed.

‘Who’s R?’

The answer ached silently in Armand’s throat… Riccardo. My comfort. My brother. The last remnant of my innocence that was destroyed.

‘A ghost.’ Armand said finally.

Week one: distance/refusal

@loumandmicrofic

Louis pulls a novel from the shelf, a leather-bound beauty long forgotten atop his dust-coated stack of unfinished books. It falls open in his hands, revealing a scene of wilted charm and decay. A magnolia flower had been pressed between the pages to mark the spot where he’d left off.

The familiar scent that had once laced the apartment with its sweet fragrance brings a rush of painful memories. Louis waking up to magnolia blooms left on his pillow after he and Armand had had a fight. A flurry of creamy-pink petals falling around him like carnival confetti, tossed by a gravity-defying Armand in the hopes of coaxing him out of a depressive stupor.

But the magnolia tree is gone now.