🎀

If I can get that skinny once, then I can do it again but BETTER

My mother says I am hard to love.

She says “a task only for one sent from above”

But what does she mean by this?

She does not mean I am one boys don’t want to kiss

for she knows boys have kissed me without asking for much.

She does not mean I am someone no one will touch.

She would say I am touched too much and now used up.

She would say I am ruined too many have drank from my cup.

If she knows I am kissed, touched, and used then by her “hard to love statement” I am confused.

Well, by this she means I am not like my sister

I do not say “yes please” or call a man “Mister”

I am not quiet, gentle, or meek

and a nice Christian man I will never seek

She means I am loud and never agree

She thinks because of this it will only ever be “me”…

Never “us”, never “them”. She thinks I will be alone.

A man could never love a girl with a mind of her own.

She would claim my biggest problem is that I am “hostile”

To be a lovable girl is to be docile.

I am the girl that boys “practice” on

they test me out and then they are gone

A man could never love me in this wretched state.

They would surely leave if they found out I was late

because no one wants a Family with the practice girls.

I am their swine, they are searching for pearls.

My Mother is right

And that is a claim I do not take light.

I am easy to touch, I am funny, even sweet

I do not lack a brain, my teachers called me “a treat.”

I have never once been called “slut”, “whore”, or cheap,