grayson

GRAYSON PIERCE ( HE/HIM ) is a CIS MAN, THIRTY-THREE year old BAKER AT DELIA’S CAFE  who has been living in Moorbrooke for FOUR YEARS. They were born on JULY 23rd and right now, they are currently residing in OAKLEY COURT. It has been said that they look suspiciously like DANIEL SHARMAN and if they had to choose a song to describe themselves, they would choose WATERMELON SUGAR by HARRY STYLES. 

RAVI.

‘i know it’s so complicated.’ ravi laughed softly as he reached for the plate of berries to share with grayson. ‘ugh, you’re just… wonderful, gray. an amazing kisser and you’ve got the biggest heart and some part of me really just wants to ask you to run away with me. just me and you, fuck this town and everyone in it. we’d go somewhere new and make our own happiness. but it’s not plausible, and fuck i just wish it was that easy.’ they smiled sadly, nodding as they took in his words. they could see the love in his eyes, the love for andrej that was never going to disappear overnight. ‘yeah, i’ll give it another go. no, hush. you’re good. the love is very obvious. i’ll give it another go, i always will. he’s always been a big part of my life and my healing. and platonic i can do. i can even do the occasional flirting but my heart? that can’t be anywhere near andrej. i just need boundaries. and this wasn’t his fault and i’m sorry if i made it his fault. honestly, it was just my problem. i never should’ve been in the middle of this whole thing and now you two can figure out your problems. and just.. while we’re on this topic.’ ravi bit his lip before letting out a long sigh, ‘emmett is the purest of hearts. i don’t know how close you two are, but he was crushed to never have a clue what happened between you and andrej. andrej’s a dick for leading everyone on, i hope everyone works through their problems but please don’t stomp on emmett’s heart. just be mindful that your actions and andrej’s actions have consequences. i just don’t want to see anyone hurt, not you or emmett or even andrej.’

enzo has to hold back a snort when grayson says it’s nice to see him, lips pressing together to form a thin line. “surprise, i’m not dead.” they attempt to joke, though the words come out more flatly than he intended. it was only a matter of time before they ran into each other again, and enzo was honestly surprised that it had taken this long. maybe the universe had been looking out for them, but honestly, he doubted it. the universe hadn’t been kind to enzo, not ever, not really.

“uh, i’m fine.” a lie. not that he cared for grayson to know the truth. it was too complicated, too raw. besides, they weren’t really friends. they weren’t really anything. “i own the blackberry bakery now. best baked goods in moorbrooke.” enzo chuckles, half shrugging. “you look…well. i’m, uh, glad to see it.”

   grayson was never one to hold anything back, not even when the situation was delicate, he never truly learned what a filter meant. so when enzo makes the light joke, as morbid as it was, gray can’t help the amused snort that left his lips, “well, actually, yeah.” he admits, but is quick to add, “i’m genuinely happy to see you’re not, though. for once, it’s good to be proven wrong, and, you look so damn good.” even if he was probably the last person enzo wanted to hear any of this from, he meant it when he said they looked good. they definitely looked healthier than the last time they had seen him, and that’s what he meant by good, they were always an attractive person to grayson so that should’ve gone without saying. 

This hurt too fucking much, all Andrej wanted to do was get out of this place. Maybe he’d call in sick again tomorrow, honestly he felt ill enough anyway, but he’d already taken the piss now and probably used up more sick days than he actually had. Andrej was just grateful that Leo was understanding, used to Andrej being a complete mess but not giving up on him either way. He needed people who hadn’t given up on him yet, like the rest of the world apparently had. Maybe Andrej deserved that, after all – it wasn’t as though he’d ever been grateful for the good things he got and just used and discarded the ones who tried to be there for him. Maybe he didn’t even deserve to have anyone on his side with the way he treated people sometimes. Andrej was a hopeless case, never learned from his mistakes, never stayed on the good path for long enough. Too trouble, too flighty, left a path of destruction wherever he went. He was fucking tired. And he looked it, his eyes were dull now the usual shine had completely vanished and at this point he didn’t even know what he was running on because everything took so much energy. Even this conversation felt draining and it hadn’t even begun. He looked and felt utterly broken. And Grayson seemed to be the same and Andrej knew it was all his fault. “I never MEANT to hurt you. I never meant to hurt anyone. I never meant for us to get feelings, for our friendship to be ruined. I never met to catch feelings for Emmett either.” Words just tumbled out of him and he didn’t really know what he was saying, his mind wasn’t in the right place these days and he felt like he was working on autopilot. He hid everything from the world and then wondered why no one fucking noticed.

“I think I did deserve what you said.” Andrej looked down at his feet. “It wasn’t as though any of it was untrue and it should have been the kick I needed to sort my shit out but…” If anything, it had been the kick that finally sent him on the spiral he’d been so close to the edge of. He’d been hanging on by his fingertips and that night had been the final push to send him sailing down the rabbit hole. “I was cruel to you and I did it on purpose because that’s the kind of person I am. We’ve known each other for four fucking years and it’s enough for me to know how to get under your skin and that was all I wanted. But you didn’t deserve that.” All Andrej had wanted was to push him completely away and the easiest method to push people away was with cruelty. “I don’t know how to make you understand, Gray. Like fuck, I can barely even explain to my therapist what the fuck is going on up there,” he pointed to his head, “so I don’t know how to make YOU understand.” The words Grayson said send a sinking feeling down his stomach. It was exactly how Andrej felt too but he wasn’t supposed to. His entire heart was supposed to be for Emmett but he knew it wasn’t and it wasn’t fair to pretend otherwise. “I can’t do this, Gray, why couldn’t you just – just, I don’t know – not have fucking feelings for me the way it was supposed to be? Why couldn’t I?” He should have shaken Grayson’s hands away but instead it just drew him closer. Grayson was intoxicating. Maybe the reason he’d fallen back into old bad habits was because his old drug was gone – Grayson had been his drug and he needed something to fill the space he left. He couldn’t stay away. Instead of speaking, he suddenly surged forward and wrapped his arms tightly around Grayson, a sob he’d been holding back leaving his lips. “I don’t want to lose you. I need you so fucking badly, I can’t stay away from you. I just don’t know what to do, everything’s such a mess.” 

   he had never meant for this to get to the point that it had all gotten to, but it was too late for that. here they were, standing in front of each other, hurt consuming them both, and it felt like things seemed hopeless for a second. how had he allowed himself to mess everything up so badly? even more, how could he ever have taken it anything out on andrej? hearing him admit he never meant to hurt him, or anyone, he felt so foolish for everything. he almost didn’t want to let andrej continue, almost wanted to tell him to stop talking because he could feel every word that left his lips knock down his walls. man. he was lucky that he worked under leo, someone who was so understanding because he knew he was going to have to use one of his nonexistent sick days after tonight. if only to stay home with andrej, because there was no way he was going to let the other out of his sight after tonight. watching him as he spoke broke grayson’s heart more and more. he began to notice every detail about him, how exhausted he looked, and wished he could somehow pick up his pieces. he could see how much andrej was hurting, the struggle he was having, just trying to explain anything right now, and it killed grayson. had he helped make this worse? surly he didn’t matter that much to the other, right? wasn’t he a temporary fix? but even as his mind tried to throw those words from the ally back at him to distract him from the way his heart was racing right now, it didn’t make a difference. he couldn’t stop thinking about andrej, about how everything had felt so horrible since their break up, and he couldn’t keep holding back at this rate. “andrej,” but before he could speak up to say anything about what the other had just spilled to him, he felt andrej’s arms wrap around him.

RAVI.

ravi had set up this lavish picnic because he couldn’t leave things the way they were. grayson wasn’t the one he’d wanted to hurt, not that they’d wanted to hurt anyone. but their anger was with andrej. grayson was just the right person at a very wrong time and it wasn’t something they could overlook. ‘it’s… okay, i know. i just wanted to say i’m sorry. i can’t do romantic with you, but i still really do want to be your friend, grayson. i still have this little crush on you, but it’s more than that too. i really like talking to you and hanging out and having fun. i’m really willing to give us another go, but in a platonic way. if you’re willing?’ he said as he sat down on the picnic blanket, smiling sweetly at grayson. 

Nothing would make this easier. Even if Grayson did all the things that Andrej wanted, it wouldn’t make it easier because he didn’t ACTUALLY want all the shit he asked for. He didn’t want Grayson to hate him, he wanted Grayson to love him still. Yet at the same time, he wanted him to fuck off altogether and get out of his head so he could be in love with Emmett and just Emmett, the way he was supposed to be. Maybe he should just leave Moorbooke, he had enough reasons to. He could get away from this whole mess, get away from his brother. He’d probably miss this town considering it was the first place that had ever felt like home but did it even matter anymore now it no longer was a home? “Just assumed you never stopped being angry to begin with,” he responded in a tight voice. It was hard to know how to act around Grayson because he didn’t know where they stood and just assumed that they were now closer to being enemies if anything. He was convinced that Grayson finally did genuinely hate him. Finally, he looked up at Grayson and suddenly he once again had the urge to shove him against the counter and smash their lips together but he had to force that out of his head. He wasn’t allowed those thoughts anymore. 

“No, I don’t want you to apologise for anything.” Not if you meant it. If Grayson truly meant everything he said then apologies wouldn’t meant anything to Andrej. The truth deserved to be spilled because at least for once they were being honest with each other. The only times they’d ever been truly open and honest was when they admitted they wanted to be with each other. He still didn’t quite meet Grayson’s eyes when he came closer. It was probably not possible for him to see how blurry Andrej felt behind his eyes but he wasn’t going to give Grayson a chance to see, either way. “Yeah, you’re right, you DON’T fucking get it. You don’t get how I feel, you never will, never have. Four fucking years, I just…” He trailed off. It was stupid because Andrej was always the one who insisted this needed to be no strings attached. They both did but Andrej went out of his way to make sure he didn’t feel anything but he did a shitty job of doing that. As soon as Emmett’s name as mentioned, Andrej’s face changed and he half shook his head, swallowing. He didn’t want to admit that he’d ruined things with Emmett too. “He left the apartment too. He… he doesn’t want me either.” And frankly? Andrej didn’t blame either of them for not wanting him. 

   it didn’t matter how angry grayson got, or tried to get, with andrej; no amount of it could make him actually mean any of the cruel things he had said to the other that night in the alley. he loved him. he loved him with every fiber of his being, and it was because he loved him that he was trying to hate him all the same. he wanted to find a way to make it easier for andrej to live happily ever after with someone who was stable, more relaxed, someone who wasn’t going to get into bar fights every other night, who could control their temper, who was good. maybe if grayson had ever felt like he was good somehow, he would have been able to give himself the courage to fight for andrej when he was breaking things off rather than putting on a smile and pretending like it was okay. for someone who was very confident in almost anything he did, grayson’s self-esteem wasn’t as high as most people would think. another thing about grayson that most people seem to brush over is the fact that he could possibly have feelings that get hurt; though it often didn’t bother him, people not noticing that resulted in grayson turning hurt to anger rather quickly. as much as he wanted to tell andrej that he was more hurt than angry the moment their eyes locked again, even if for a brief second, grayson felt the wind get knocked out of him. all he could do was tighten his jawline and slowly exhale a breath he didn’t even realize he had been holding.

Andrej didn’t know why the fuck he was here. Well, he KNEW why he was here – he’d already called in sick enough times over the past two weeks and made up feeble excuses to get out of work, and he actually needed money considering he was close to having to eat Aristotle’s dog food if he didn’t pick up some more shifts. But he didn’t know why he thought it would be a good idea to actually come in on a day that Grayson would be working. They’d done a good job of avoiding each other since that night – he thought two weeks of moving their shifts around to completely avoid each other was impressive but it was hard work keeping it up. Andrej had considered just quitting altogether but he knew he would never be able to find somewhere as good as Delia’s so he was just going to suck it up. And the shift was absolute hell. Every single customer seemed to be grating on his nerves, he was just feeling hot and uncomfortable all day and he spent the entire day wishing he’d filled his water bottle up with vodka instead of water. During his break he actually did go out and do that, just so he wouldn’t feel as shitty when he had to finish the day alone with Grayson.

The best part of the day was when he finally got to turn the sign around to say Closed and was able to begin shutting the place down. He’d already started on it before the last customers trickled out because there was no way in hell that he was remaining here longer than he needed to. Yet in the back of his mind, he knew they still had a fucking stock order to put away too so there was probably no avoiding Grayson. As he scrubbed the place down, Andrej could hear him come out to the front and instantly he felt irritable and prickly even without him speaking. He stood up from where he was bent down by the cupboards and leaned against the counter, hoping he didn’t look quite as awful as he felt. “Are you not capable of getting it yourself?” he responded dryly, raising an eyebrow. Still, he complied and picked up Grayson’s phone and ignored the urge to just smash it on the floor as he passed it over. “We still have an order to put away. I’m not letting you get out of that. I thought that it was me who was the one who’s good at leaving, right?” He scoffed and then grabbed a cloth so he could busy himself cleaning the counter that was already polished, just so he didn’t have to look at Grayson.

   a soft sigh left his lips the moment andrej replied, carefully taking the phone from his hand. it’s not like grayson expected the other to be warm in the slightest with him; hell, he barely expected to keep up his attempt at a peaceful shift for much longer, but it still stung. the fucking stock order. it took a lot of self-restraint not to let out a loud groan when andrej reminded him about it, if only because he didn’t want the other to think the groan would’ve been about having to stay longer around him. he didn’t mind that he had to stay around the other, even if there was clear tension in the air and it was physically hurting him to be around andrej at the moment, at the end of it all, he missed him. hearing andrej repeat the last words grayson had thrown at him that night nearly knocked the wind out of him, that DID trigger a part of him to become annoyed. it’s not like it would take much to push grayson over the edge right now anyway; he knew andrej knew that he knew andrej knew exactly how to push his buttons if he really wanted to. and it seemed like he wanted to do just that. for a second, grayson thought about not caving in, he even turned around to begin walking back towards the back room, but those fucking words kept coming back to his mind. 

         “i thought it was me who was the one who’s good at leaving, right?”

   grayson had been living in moorbrooke for quite some time now, sometimes it felt like his entire life, and as a result, he had gotten familiar with the locals in one way or another. whether it be personally or because he often saw them at their workplace, either way, he pretty much knew a majority of the people who lived around town. he had also gotten familiar with spots around town and which ones he enjoyed versus those he didn’t care too much for. the wolfeton library was in the middle for him. he didn’t seek it out daily as he didn’t feel like he had much time to dedicate to reading most days, but on the rare occasion he did feel like picking up a book, or someone recommended him something good to read, he enjoyed his visits. but he didn’t enjoy them because he enjoyed visiting the library that much or because reading got him that excited, not really. He enjoyed them because of one of the very kind and cute librarians who worked there. sometimes he would go there and ask for a recommendation just for an excuse to keep the guy around him longer. what could he say? when someone caught his eye, they caught his eye.

   one hour, two, or three had gone by since grayson's arrival to the beachwood diner. he hadn't gone there with intentions of meeting anyone but rather with intentions of spending some time alone but also not secluded like he had been doing recently. it was around brunch when he arrived, and by now he had lost track of how many times he'd taken advantage of the coffee refills, but he was appreciative of the kind waitress who didn't seem to mind. for a while, he had sat and stared out the window, people watching, letting his mind wander from thought to thought. everything was a mess for grayson lately. it truly felt like he had lost control of everything in life and no matter what he did, it felt like he only made things worse. as he sat and watched the people of moorbrooke walk by, some semi-familiar faces from the cafe, grayson wondered about their stories. he wondered if someone out there was walking on by who was having a much crappier time in life right now, and if they were, grayson wished them the best. after a while, however, he could no longer take living in his head. it became a bit of a nasty place if it was given too much time to be in control, and so, he decided to pull his phone out and get lost in random articles on the internet.

   grayson had accepted to double today before he realized who was closing tonight. he was never good at checking his schedule to see who he worked with. honestly, he only ever cared to see what time he had to come in by, and by the time he realized who was on the closing shift tonight, he was already at work, and andrej was clocking on. the entire shift, he tried his hardest to remain in the back, as far from the view of anyone as possible, but every so often, it was inevitable that the two would run into each other. as the hours ticked away to closing the doors, grayson’s nerves grew more and more. part of him was expecting andrej to begin lashing out at him the moment they closed the doors, something he wasn’t entirely up for dealing with tonight, and another part was unsure of how to deal with whatever was going on between the two of them. where they fighting? it seemed silly to think they were, but there was no denying that what had happened the night andrej found him was something that couldn’t just be looked over. things were said, and while they couldn’t be taken back, grayson felt horrible for having said them. he actually wanted to apologize, for once, but he had no idea how even to begin that conversation.

   ever since grayson met jackson, the guy was instantly intrigued by the other. honestly, he would be surprised to find out someone in the town wasn’t intrigued by jackson; he was fascinating in many ways. for grayson it was the way jackson made him laugh but also could get him to want to slam him against the nearest wall and smother in kisses simultaneously. unlike andrej, his friendship with jackson was strictly flirtationship and a bit of bromance here and there. it was simple, and right now, grayson desperately needed simple. so when he reached out to see what jackson was up to tonight, he was happy to find out that he could steal him for the night, and he did just that. as much as he didn’t feel like being in an open setting, he also had zero intentions of bringing jackson back to the apartment he shared with two roommates that things were currently very awkward with, so he chose to meet up at the bar.

The moment Andrej came over here to speak to Grayson, he instantly knew it was a mistake and maybe he should have just thrown his morals down the drain and left Grayson’s ungrateful ass to freeze to death in the cold. He didn’t think his day could possibly GET any worse but apparently Grayson made that very much possible and he would be impressed if he weren’t so angry now. It didn’t take much to make Andrej’s temper flare, not when he was in the state he was in right now. The answer to Grayson’s question was that he didn’t know why the fuck he cared about him. If Andrej had it his way, he would just never see the man ever again and forget about him completely but his brain had other ideas. So did his heart too, apparently. “You know what? I don’t fucking KNOW why I give a shit what happens to you. Maybe I shouldn’t, maybe I should just leave you out here on the floor so you can beg for attention from the entirety of this town. Because that’s all you want, isn’t it? You want attention but not love so you don’t have to feel a fucking thing or allow anything with anyone to be real.” His voice was bitter and he really shouldn’t have been doing this right now but once he started, it was like everything just spiralled out of him and he couldn’t put a lid on it until his brain decided it was time for him to stop. Maybe later he’d feel numb and empty again, guilty too, but right now his anger had taken over every single nerve in his body and he could feel himself trembling, vibrating with all the pent up fury inside of him. Maybe it was himself he was angry at, not Grayson, but it was just easier to direct it all at him. 

Home was the wrong word because home didn’t exist anymore. It was just an empty apartment filled with what were once happy memories now frozen in time. And just a sad man and a sad dog to sit and look at them. It wasn’t a home, it was just a building that nobody really lived in anymore. How could so much change within two weeks? The apartment had once been filled with love and joy and Andrej had always known that eventually he’d ruin it but after four years, he was wondering if maybe that part of his life was over. Clearly he’d become too comfortable. As he listened to Grayson, his face grew colder and crueler and it was an expression Grayson had probably never seen on him before but it was one that used to permanently live on his face a long time ago. Cruelty was easy, cruelty was something he could do and anyone who had known him before Moorbrooke knew that. “You’re right.” He scoffed and then folded his arms over his chest as a horrible smile so unlike his own appeared on his lips. If this was the game that they were going to play then he’d be damned if he showed Grayson even the tiniest bit how every word that left his lips was twisting the knife deeper and deeper into his heart. It hurt that everything Grayson said was so cruel yet so true because he DID ruin everything he touched. He’d ruined Emmett now, too. “Yet you’re the fool who fell into my trap, aren’t you? You know that nobody will ever truly love you because you won’t LET them, so that’s why you’re drawn to people like me who will pick you up and then tear you apart because that’s how little self-worth you possess that you know it’s all you deserve. You run away the second things get real because you’re a COWARD.” He wanted to slap Grayson away as he was touched but instead his face hardened and he stared him coldly in the eyes. Hearing Ravi’s name brought into this cut him again but his face remained unchanged. “Maybe I fucking will. Maybe Ravi should be warned that you are a shitty person. Because one day, Grayson, one day you’ll get scared or angry again and then you’ll take all of his vulnerabilities, all the things they’ve told you in confidence, and just spit it all back out and use it against him because THAT’S the kind of person you clearly are. You don’t deserve anyone as good as Ravi which is why you’ll only ever be stuck with somebody like me who doesn’t even truly want you. You’re just a temporary fix, nothing more.”

   oh. how grayson wished he could have taken back every word he had just spat out at andrej, but he couldn’t, he couldn’t undo what he had just done. he didn’t hate andrej right now, but he was furious with him. it filled him with rage to see the other reach out a helping hand to him right now because it felt like such a tease. why did he have to be like this? why couldn’t he just leave grayson to be a pathetic piece of shit in the streets? that’s all he was to the other anyway, wasn’t it? as he listened to andrej throw words back in his direction that felt like small invisible blades, each cutting deeper and deeper, he felt his face and heart grow colder. andrej could’ve thrown anything at him, but when it came to speaking about what he wanted, sounding like he knew exactly what grayson wanted, that’s when it hurt the most to listen to him. or so he thought. he had no idea what more andrej was about to throw at him, nor the effect it would have on him the moment those words were spoken. right now, however, all he could do was shake his head as andrej spoke, “you’re so fucking wrong, andrej.” that’s all his stupid pride would let him utter in defense. in reality, he wanted to spill everything else to andrej; he wanted to tell the other how it was him that he wanted all of that from. but, how? how the hell was grayson expected to be open with his heart when he had been told to basically take a hike because emmett was here now? and when he thought about things more, he knew ravi was right in also leaving him. maybe he was mad at himself more than at andrej for everything happening at the moment because grayson should’ve known better; he should’ve never allowed himself to cross any line beyond flirting with anyone. 

“just who i wanted to speak with then.” cat said with a grin. “and from the looks of it… i’m assuming everything is good here. this is going to be very, very difficult. i can tell.” she bit her lip as she looked towards the display case. “well… i like cream cheese. is that any helpful?”