Oh, sod it.

“Humans are inherently selfish--" Then why do so many cultures value hospitality, to the point of dictating it in their religions? Why is it so common for hosts to offer their visitors their best food, and as much of it as they can? At some point, multiple cultures decided that they knew what it felt like to be alone and vulnerable, and promised each other to never let those who stay with them feel that way. That doesn't sound very "inherently selfish" to me.

And to everyone going "Oh, but he probably had other qualities", you're kind of missing the point. Sure, he could have been a storyteller, a philosopher, world's best babysitter, a genius at thinking up dirty jokes - but he could also have been grumpy old uncle Nandy who never really enriched anyone's existence and he still had value as a person.

The first sign of civilization is a healed femur. The first sign of humanity is an old scar. The first sign we were people at all is the grave Of a child Laid to rest as though sleeping With flowers all around.

I recently attended a queer community event and there was a group of older women who coordinated to provide hugs to any participants who needed one. I went over to tell them how cool this was and to thank them, and the lady I talked to said 'hey, so, we're all moms, but we don't have any dads with us. Want to join us as a dad?' (ADATF assigned dad at the function, woop!) (understandable because I am white-haired and butch and giant and was also wearing brown plaid flannel, plus my entire being is suffused with an epic level of dorkiness that I guess really reads as dad for some qualities of dadness) Anyway I was like Fuck Yeah Hi I'm Dad and started giving hugs as assigned, attempting to give the kind of enveloping, all-encompassing and all-accepting hugs that I thought would be most effective, but this one little masc person pulled back afterwards and said 'no offense, but that was like a mom hug. could i have a dad hug?', and I was so confused by this for a moment I said 'dad hug?' and waved my hands like patting, and they were like 'yes! like the back-slapping! like you gotta knock the gay cooties off!' so I squared up and gave them a big back-slapping hug, and, being amused, added 'you want me to call you Sport?' and they got very small in my arms and quietly said 'yeah... please', so I rocked them a little while still patting and said 'oh, it's okay, Sport, I got you. Pal. Buddy. Champ. Ace. We're gonna keep the gay cooties, yeah?' and they nodded and then snuggled in and didn't let go for some time so I guess I did okay. Anyway. Further study on gendered hugs needed, apparently.